Family holiday drama

[familydrama1]

So we are due to go on holiday next year with family. We invited my parents, they booked their own room - they then invited my nephew (who is 17). My brother didn't pay for my nephew or even offer to pay for their place.

I found out I was pregnant recently and can't book the baby's space until they are born. Also there will be no spaces as, the baby is due 4 months before the holiday. Anyone we trust with our child will be on that holiday. We need to take my nephew off the booking and change it to the baby when they are born.

AIBU to take my nephew off the booking (I have spoken to my parents about this and they understand) but I know my brother won't be happy and it will cause drama. Or should just not go and lose thousands 😣

Need an outside perspective pleaseeee

None of this is the nephews fault (and who paid for what isn’t his issue either). Of course you can’t boot him off the cruise. Well, unless you actually want a family rift going forward.. If they can’t accommodate a small baby (really?), you will need to find an alternative, and if that means losing money so be it.

OP, you may have paid a (very) small part of your parents room to accommodate one of your children in their room for the duration of the cruise BUT your parents paid for your nephew to be in their room.
How can you possibly think it's okay to now kick your nephew - that your parents paid for - out of their room so that you can put another of your children there, presumably for free.
Your poor parents are being treated like free childcare!

That last paragraph is the only way I can make sense of it all.

If that’s what it is, no nephew should go; he’ll enjoy it far more than a baby. I can’t think of anything worse than a cruise with a baby anyway.

Of course you can't take your Nephew off the booking.

There is no way that a 4 month old baby would need to take the place of an Adult. I have flown/been on holiday with my kids when they were young loads of time (from the age of 9 weeks).

If you read my previous replies. I did pay for half my parents cabin as my child would be in there too. My brother, however, did not pay a penny for my nephew

Nowhere in your previous posts have you said you paid for half of their cabin, you said you paid for your daughter, and that your parents paid for your nephew. It's unclear what else your parents have paid for,as you have said they booked their own cabin, and then later said that you booked it for them.

Surely it’s no one else’s problem you got pregnant after booking other than your own?

And this is what it is clearly all about for you - you are jealous that your brother isn't contributing for his son.

But really, if its 4 people per cabin then you would need 2 cabins even if your parents weren't going. By them going, you have only paid a contribution to your daughter's share of their cabin rather than the whole thing. You're being subsidised by your parents just like your brother is.

Just book and pay for another cabin. If the cruise operator wants names now then you just put your husband and one child.

But don’t you now need to pay for a full extra cabin ( not half?) . Am I right in thinking you have worked this out on the basis you and DH have to share? Sometimes ( and it will happen increasingly with 4 children) you just have to suck it up and put some children in a room with him and some with you on holiday. Are you suggesting nephew just doesn’t come?

So the bottom line is how are you going to resolve this?

And are you 100% sure your baby will meet the age criteria on the date of the cruise?

So going from this reply alone.. it sounds like you're put out by the fact your brother hasn't paid for the Nephew but you have paid towards the cost of their room?
I don't think you should be basically chucking the nephew off the cruise completely, that's unfair! None of this is his fault.

What about upgrading to suite where you can fit all your family and parents and nephew keep their cabin?

So basically you put money towards your parents cabin so they could have your child in with them? They agreed and then offered to take (and pay for) your nephew and now you're trying to use an unborn baby as an excuse to get your nephew to not come on the cruise because you're bitter that your parents paid for him and your brother didn't have to pay anything.

Got it.

OP you seem quite determined in your course of action, even though there is a very sensible alternative.

It’s coming across strongly in your posts that you just want to exclude nephew any which way because your brother didn’t pay for him, your parents did. You come across as petty and cruel.

If you’re not going to change your mind when presented with alternatives, stop trying to seek validation for your actions from this thread. YABU.

I am still confused, are you already a family of 5 or 4 (currently 3 or 2 children?). You recently found out and are currently about 4/ 5 months pregnant and baby due by January/February? So will be 6 months by July/August. You and parents have 2 cabins both allowed 4 passengers, 2 adults and 2 children (including your nephew). None of the other members of family travelling have space in their cabins, which will sleep 2,3 or 4 and none of them can swap to a cabin that is currently free which sleeps one more I.e a 2 person to a 3 or 4, so that another can ge added? In this case, I would be asking cruise line to move your booking 12 months to the following year, whether the rest of the family move as well is another matter and surely you are within cruise line cancellations to get most of the money back as 12 months before the holiday even if they wont move the ho,iday (which is unusual as most will).

Let's hope OP doesn't have twins, otherwise she'll need to decide which of her DP's she's booting off the cruise alongside her poor nephew 🙈

@banoffeelover 😂😂😂

@HelpmyDCbecomefinanciallysavvy

What???

We always paid for two rooms split me and DH up as the two adults on the booking but actually let the children have their own room to themselves.

You can't boot your nephew off of the trip, but I suspect you are going to, regardless of what anyone else says on here!

Not on a cruise in hotels when they were older always adjacent rooms with connecting doors too.

Cruises are my idea of hell on earth. I have been on one in my twenties never again!

Because after that, she then said if she was to book another room it would have to have an adult in it. So its not fully booked shes just bullshitting

It doesn't work like this on a cruise

1. the baby absolutely has to be over 6m - to the day so check your dates

2. the age of the child matters there are a number of spaces per age range you can't hurt swap a 17 yr old for a 6m old.

3. babies on cruises aren't charged full child price often they are only £99

4. cabin size matters, if you're goi g with multiple members of family maybe you can rejig the cabins? BUT you CANNOT as suggested by some stay in different rooms to what is booked - you can get away with this in a hotel but not Ona cruise where your cruise card is your ID, payment method and room key. The cabin stewards also will notice and report.

I suggest you call the cruise line and discuss with them. This is all pointless speculation until you know what is possible with a in availability and spaces.

I'm not sure why the need for the 'family holiday drama'.
Just book another room for your husband and one of the children. Problem solved.
I'm amazed the cruise company didn't suggest this as the solution quite honestly.

If your parents hadn’t decided to come - where was your child that is now an occupant of their room going to sleep ?

Your poor parents having two kids in their room. My idea of hell!

The whole thread is bonkers.

I don't really understand the logistics, but ousting your nephew from the party would be a rotten thing to do.