To think people at work shouldn't ask 'what happened to your hand?'

[StarShineHello]

Currently have a bandage on my hand due to a skin infection. I have bad eczema which got infected and in a very bad state.

I've had to wrap it up because it's just so gross to see.

Today five different people have asked me what's wrong with my hand.

I don't want to explain my medical issues to strangers.

I understand there's a level of small talk in the bank/shop/post office but to ask someone a medical question just seems rude? It was every shop I went in.

And I just lied and said I burnt myself because I didn't want to go into details about infected skin and my eczema.

AIBU to think people in general shouldn't ask things like that and especially in a professional capacity? It's common sense to not point out something 'wrong' with a customer??

Wank friction burn

"You should see my partner!"

Yes, is ok to ask discreetly if you think the person needs help.

That's different from a public "what did you do to your face/hand" etc in a banter sort of way.

Odd maybe but not unfriendly. I’d think that they’re telling me to mind my own business but indirectly.

YABU, it is normal to ask when someone has a visible injury.

Last year I broke my arm and I was surprised that a few people I knew well had whole conversations without ever asking about the big obvious arm cast. All women, and maybe they were trying not to be intrusive but I just found it weird. Most people (and all men) just went straight in with "Hi - hey what happened your arm?!" which to me is more normal.

My colleague walks with a cane, many customers ask her why. Her latest reply was 'too much sex' with a straight face!

It's always uncomfortable when people ask but I suggest making up fun answers!

It is ignorance and lack of empathy. I don't care how "curious" you are, you don't ask, because it takes very little imagination to realise that the bandaged person is going to be asked repeatedly throughout the day, and that you want to be in the adult half of the population who control their nosiness, and it is none of your business anyway

Well, I might ask if you are OK, as I rush to open the door for you, or offer to push your trolley to the car, put your bags in the car boot, etc. Yes I don't know you, probably won't see you again, might see you again randomly. It's just that general care of all in our society and polite good manners. I don't need all the details but if someone is clearly suffering can I help? If I can, pleased to do so.

I saw a thing like that with a good friend. His hand had all swelled up. I didn't ask and was careful to make sure he didn't see me looking. But I was quite panic stricken and it still worries me.

I kind of wished that I could have asked just to have reassurance that he was okay, but I supected that he probably really wasn't, which was why I didn't ask.

I suppose that means that people probably assume with you that it is likely to be something fairly minor and with a 100% recovery rate and they just want to give you the chance to get it off your chest.

I think as well I wouldn't ask about this incase it was a self harm injury

Oh, there were plenty of people around, end of a lecture. Wasn't a problem as I could choose what to say. Though pretty obvious and easily guessable, two black eyes, stitched up cut to the head. I don't see a problem personally. I was also asked in a supermarket.

Bellsandthistle · Today 20:23
they’re not her workmates*
My mistake!

To be honest it still wouldn't bother me if strangers asked. However I acknowledge not everyone is comfortable with that.

I'd rather people ask what was wrong than jump to conclusions.
Last summer I had a black eye that was huge and so obvious. As the day went on I more or less forgot about it but I noticed that I got sympathetic looks and DH was getting evils. Dh is the most easy going person and has never raised his voice to me never mind his hand. People assumed he had done it by the looks they were giving us and the 'Are you ok love' comments I got.
If I said that I had walked into a door I would not have been believed but it was true. I grabbed a door handle and slipped at the same time. DH was 20 miles away at the time!

I’ve had weeping crusty eczema on my hands that also needed bandaging for work. When asked I said it was eczema. When I hurt my foot and was limping around the office and people asked what happened, I said I’d hurt my foot. What’s the problem? Colleagues asked because they noticed something was wrong and hoped I was okay. In fact I was told to wfh until my foot got better, so a win for me.

Just for clarification they are NOT my workmates.

I worded my title badly.

It would be normal for colleagues to ask, but I'm talking about strangers in shops and banks and post offices
In THEIR place of work, who I do NOT know know at all.

I meant they shouldn't ask people about their health as small talk whilst processing a card payment etc...with lots of other customers about to listen.

Next week it will be 'I have an injured hand, all bandaged up yet no-one has bothered to ask what's wrong or if I'm all right'!

I’m a terrible person, I always ask if I see someone with a bandage on!

It’s not rude to ask about a bandage. If they saw your eczema and asked ‘what’s that?’ I think that would be rude.

No reason to lie about the cause either, just say it’s an infection of your eczema. I can’t understand what is wrong with that.

I would ask one of my regulars if they had that, both in the pub and when I was in a supermarket. Its shows empathy and concern.

You are are feeling self conscious about it, so you are feeling a bit snippy about anyone drawing attention to it, but realistically they are think "Oh poor thing, hope it doesnt hurt too much". Just say "Was carving the meat for Sunday lunch and managed to carve myself up instead!" and laugh. They will cringe at the thought and wish you a speedy recovery, job done.

@StarShineHello I hope it heals soon. I used Fucidin cream (prescription) on my impetigo and it works really fast

When I was a teenager, working in a newsagents, I had orf and had to keep my hand bandaged . If you know you know.

Try explaining to people that you’d been bitten by a lamb and see what reaction you get😉

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/orf/

I would ask if I care about the person

I'd like to be asked. It would feel rude to me if what looked like an injury was completely ignored. So they couldn't please everyone either way.

It is polite to ask and show a bit of compassion so people do. It is not really nosy as no one is that interested unless you were bitten by a snake or something equally unusual.

Me too.

How utterly, utterly ridiculous.
Suck it up sugar and be pleased that people actually seem to be interested/care.

You'd like to be asked about an injury from every single customer service person you encounter eberytime you go out?

That seems incredibly needy?

Why would you need a complete stranger to ask you about an injury?

😂😂😂