Quiet neighbours now making noise.

[OpalBird]

My neighbours talked to us about the noise coming from our property. OK, my son has a hobby that does make an annoying noise. Since then we have made sure he's doing it less but we obviously aren't going to stop him completely. They haven't said anything since and I think we've been considerate in reducing the number of hours our son does his thing.

It seems like they've now decided that they are allowed to make more noise. We've been neighbours for years and they've always been quiet. Now we get occasional music or radio in their backyard. When I asked them about it they said they have always worn headphones to be considerate but they don't really like listening that way, so they thought it was fair they got to have their hobbies the way they enjoy them best as well.

Would I be unreasonable to complain to them again? There is a difference between children playing and music when they have the option of headphones.

You are entitled. You're having me on this can't be real.

Be grateful next door haven't downloaded basketball noise and played it loudly and randomly through a speaker near your house for a couple of hours at a time so your family can enjoy the undiluted pleasure of what they have had to endure for some considerable time by the sounds of it. You've already lost the goodwill of your neighbours imo.

Why can't he play 1 to 2 hours at once. Why does it need to be split that would drive me mad. At least with music there is an end to it.

But not ok for the neighbours to listen to music 🤦🏼‍♀️

I had to do similar with a neighbour who parked really selfishly opposite our driveway which made reversing off it reallllllly difficult due to the shape of the cul de sac. We'd asked and asked very politely over the years but they refused to stop. I parked awkwardly for them maybe 3 times before they complained. I replied saying "given you have been parking awkwardly for us for years, I didn't think you'd mind where I've parked, but now you've asked of course I'll stop doing it." After that, they suddenly realised how difficult it had been and rarely parked that way from then on. Sometimes you've just got to be petty because some people (ie you OP) just don't get it otherwise.

Just because your neighbour's lights are on at 6:30 doesn't mean it's OK to be out playing basketball pre-9am. People making unnecessary noise at that time of the morning is very annoying.

It all sounds like normal household noise though 🤷‍♀️ on both sides.

Just ignore it and get on with your lives unless you want to live in a house with no neighbours.

I'm clearly the odd one out here, but I'd MUCH prefer to hear a kid practising basketball than someone playing music out loud. Move next to me OP !
😆

Our ndn have a basketball hoop on their garage, it’s just outside our lounge window on the other side of a fence, it’s a constant bumpf bumpf, I am wondering if their mum has limited the time they are out there as it’s short burst of about 15 mins which I know will stop but having said that it’s really loud it our lounge and makes watching the tv difficult so we end up going to our conservatory.

Sorry but you cant complain. The noise of a ball thumping every minute or so is incredibly intrusive. Like water torture...even the human rights act covers the right not to be tortured.

YABVU

Once before school? That’s totally out of order to be creating that sort of noise at that time of day.

This.

Basketball noise is fucking annoying, and for someone who has misophonia like me is actually really distressing, I can't stop my twat neighbours bouncing their ball but boy would I like to. I can't actually believe this is real YOU are definitely the annoying neighbours and I would be having my music on from morning til reasonable evening hours, YOU wear the headphones for a change.

Good for you taking the criticism on board. It’s not an easy thing to do.

I get that but if the music isn't too loud, it should be OK surely?

There's no comparison to someone having a radio or a speaker in their garden and the slam of a basketball on concrete for more than 30 minutes at a time.

I really think the OP fucked up when they tried to draw an equivalence.

3 or 4 times a day, are you nuts? I’d want to murder the lot of you. Take the little shit to a park.

So your neighbours have been considerate in the past, you haven't and now you're annoyed that they are also taking that stance. Righto ...

😂 you're on the wind up with this one. No way can you think this is ok.

“I am thinking about how to address it with the neighbours. I have a feeling they've not said anything for months, so we thought all was well“

I’m the equivalent of your neighbours in this situation OP, this is what I would have totally wished for and welcomed as an approach - and one that you could make:

Invite them in for coffee / invite yourself to theirs (if that would work), be conciliatory and say that you would love to listen and work things out with them.

Then I would let them talk, just listen to everything they say, don’t interject at all until they finish. Be interested.

Then you can say that since you became aware of the nuisance you had modified the number of times etc and want to work with them so you are all happy again. (e.g if they know it’s only going to be 30 mins at fixed times, say lunchtime and at teatime or whatever, that might be manageable).

Based on experience they will be living in stress much of the time, because they don’t know 1. when the noise will restart, and 2. how long it will continue for, they have no control over it, but are just passively subjected to it.

I think in these circumstances people just want to be heard. Just listening might alleviate things.

No, but hopefully you're beginning to understand how considerate your neighbours were, now they are following your example and enjoying some music in the back garden etc.

You really need to find a park with a hoop.

Yep this. ^ You have been asked loads on here @OpalBird why is your son not doing this in a designated space? Why do you think it's OK to do it on your property, with neighbours directly next to you?

This! ^

I agree.