Quiet neighbours now making noise.

[OpalBird]

My neighbours talked to us about the noise coming from our property. OK, my son has a hobby that does make an annoying noise. Since then we have made sure he's doing it less but we obviously aren't going to stop him completely. They haven't said anything since and I think we've been considerate in reducing the number of hours our son does his thing.

It seems like they've now decided that they are allowed to make more noise. We've been neighbours for years and they've always been quiet. Now we get occasional music or radio in their backyard. When I asked them about it they said they have always worn headphones to be considerate but they don't really like listening that way, so they thought it was fair they got to have their hobbies the way they enjoy them best as well.

Would I be unreasonable to complain to them again? There is a difference between children playing and music when they have the option of headphones.

Sounds like a plan. Well done for listening. I think implementing ways to make it quieter before the conversation would help so you can try to create a more positive environment before talking about timings. Most people are pretty forgiving if you genuinely apologise and admit you got it wrong ime

So in aggregate, your neighbour is having to hear the bouncing for 1.5hrs - 2 hrs every day? It great that your son is active, but can't he go out somewhere and do this?

It probably doesn't disturb OP as she has more control of the situation and can ask her son to stop playing.
The poor neighbours can't. Psychological torture for them not knowing when the "thud, thud, thud" is going to start again. Their cortisol levels will be raised and they will be very stressed.

do you live in England? Its not comparable.

Houses tend to be much further apart in the US. Additionally, the way many US homes are laid out would mean thumping from a ball being bounced on a driveway in front of an attached garage would be much more muffled in most rooms of the house than thumping right next to the fence to the back garden.

Dear lord it gets worse.
"when the weather allows"
So most of the year they're on tenterhooks just waiting for the the thump thump thump and praying for gale force winds and rain no doubt.

The OP is actually the other party. OP is really music player. Normally when behaviour is so bizarre a normal person could not justify it so they reverse parties involved.

Good plan.

Though I still can't quite believe you were so self unaware that you needed to have this spelled out for you by other people.

The lack of awareness on this post reminds me of one of my neighbours out the back of our row of terraces.

Every summer, he opens his upstairs window and plays his music really loud. He's got the most bizarre taste too, everything from D&B through to Gerry and the Pacemakers.

On a few occasions we've been in the garden with friends and it's been booming. We've joined in singing along to the ones we know, and every time we do that he gets the right hump and slams his window shut. Brass neck of him is amusing.

On and off. At completely random times throughout the day. No wonder they're unhappy.

I'm not saying I agree. It is an overwhelming majority though so there has to be something to it. I think the earlier poster just a little bit back was right when she said it's easier to bear when you have control of it. I asked. What's the point if I don't take an overwhelming majority on board?

The OP has admitted that they were BU, is going to talk to the neighbours and reach a compromise and posters are still piling on and falling over themselves to stick the boot in and accusing her of being a troll for saying people go about their lives before 10.20am

It's a shame that you don't live near a park with a hoop OP.
I think that silent basket ball looks like a great idea.

Maybe leave it as it is - you are both being inconvenienced by the other. Unless your son is going to stop playing basketball at home completely, they are going to feel (quite rightly) that you have no right to complain about occasional noise coming from their side.

Can your son time at least some of his basketball to coincide when the neighbours are out? work, shop, day out etc? They must leave the house sometimes.

Anyway if I had to live next to that sort of constant thumping I'd be putting on some very loud annoying music and pointing the speakers towards it so the basketball player knows what it's like to live with.

There’s is 2 hpurs

yours is 2 hours

i I mean. And?!?!

@Otherstories2002 I do. How is it not comparable? Are basketballs quieter in the US?

OP I have very considerate neighbours. Their son likes basket ball too. He plays about once a day for about half an hour in the early evening.
If your son wants to play more than this could you find a club for him?

Then they will be able to play music at least 90 mins each day then 🤷‍♀️

igiveuptrying how did you find this? do you know if they really work? I’m keen to get one for myself now! If I were opalbird I’d be straight onto ordering it and telling neighbours along with that plan of apology and discussion. We had to tell neighbours how badly their son’s basketball ball thumping was. We didn’t want to stop him just make them aware and see if we could compromise like play when we’re away it was so bad. They remain good neighbours.

The houses are spaced considerably further apart and they have actual spaces for playing aren’t immediately by a neighbours window.

I thought you had a change of heart but I guess not. I guess there really are entitled people like you in the world.

You think it would be selfish to stop son but are not prepared to put yourself out. If it was that important you would change garden. Instead much better to reduce neighbours enjoyment in their home at set times.

I was going to say that was a bit unfair on you when you said you got the basketball down to 30 mins a day but then you said 30 mins a day a few times a day. I think the neighbours are being fair enough tbh…

Well done OP for taking the "feedback"(!?) on board, and for remaining polite in the face of some fairly venomous replies. IMO this makes you a better potential neighbour than many on here!

Do your neighbours use their garden a lot op or have friends/family over much?

You let him play basketball BEFORE SCHOOL?£??

😳😳😳😳😳