…To Ghost Employer

[ThePlumVan]

..not resign, not communicate that I have a new job, literally just block and move on with my life ?

Been in current job 8 years.
Had the most horrendous Line Manager for 6 of those. I work across a matrix structure so am answerable to several Department Managers - but LM is the one who has refused to sign off legitimate expenses with receipts so I no longer submit them, has refused all training/CPD opportunities in that time, micromanages things she knows nothing about, contradicts me, produces meeting minutes that are misleading/inaccurate, requests very shading business practices be carried out and when I refuse has tantrums and tries to do it herself but again she isn’t qualified so can’t do it, won’t sign off annual leave until the week before so it’s too late to book holiday and then says they might have to be cancelled anyway depending on business need so I can never look forward to anything, books evening meetings when I have caring responsibilities, books daytime meetings onsite with no notice when I am working miles away, demands me to drop everything with the other departments when she has something that can wait and they don’t, so I end up working evenings to meet the other deadlines. If I miss a call from her will continually phone me until I pick up even if I’m in meetings, I could go on and on - but basically it’s been awful and has affected my mental health horrendously.

I don’t want to work my notice. I don’t want to see or speak or think of her ever again.
I feel bad for the other Depts, but not enough to go back (currently on annual leave).

YABU - just be professional and work your notice.
YANBU - your life has been hell for long enough, just block them and crack on with your lovely new job.

have you raised the issue with the HR?

How has that gone on for 6 years without you telling anyone else? Going above her? Going to HR?

She sounds like a complete dick and the type to really push for a breach of contract on your part if you don't work your notice. Without any complaints from you in 6 years, HR would probably back her because they don't know anything.

Tread carefully here as this may backfire.

If it's affecting your mental health could you get signed off sick for the period of your notice? I wouldn't just leave as I would be too worried about repercussions. At least if you work your notice, after that you can be sure never to have nothing to do with them again.

Just get on with it. And mention your brilliant new job as much as possible, to her.

Yes I attempted to involve HR - it’s very clear they’re not there for me.

My only option is to leave. It’s taken a lot to be in a position to go through a recruitment process, it’s affected me that much.

She sounds like a nightmare. Can you take some time to document everything and submit it to HR as a formal complaint/ grievance to cover yourself and then send in your resignation and cover your notice period with sick leave. As galling as it is, if you cover yourself and follow correct process and stick to your notice period, then they can't claim you have done anything wrong.

Can you just hand your notice in, and a sick note for the notice period? Get signed off with stress. If you just disappear how will they know you’ve left and pay final salary etc.

Just hand your notice in and then leave. Its not worth the hassle of her trying to hurt you.

Morally perhaps you're right, but legally and for tax and pension etc. etc. you'll obviously have to resign formally! If you're employed in two places that'll create a tax etc. mess and you might be in breach of your employment contract.

You can do that of course.

You simply have to be willing to accept any consequences of breaking your contract, up to and including legal action against you.

Realistically they probably won't bother unless you walking away causes them massive financial loss.

You really do have to resign formally, as it will create hassle for you if you don't . Whether you work your notice, cover it by sick leave or whatever is up to you.

You've managed 6 years, just manage 1-3 months more and they won't ever be able to say you breached your contract in references.

Then you never have to see them again!

You have coped this long, so for the sake of no repercussions, hand in your notice formally and work it. Or hand in notice and see if you can get signed off.

You coped with it all this time, don't lose a final wage and any pension/benefits for the sake of a few more weeks. Then you can stick your finger up and move on

Surely you will need your employer for a reference? Even if not for this job, maybe another. It’s not worth risking that.

You can hand your notice in, you can even be explicit as to why you are leaving, and then do only what you are contracted to do and ride it out. And all the time you are working your notice, you will feel such relief and happiness that you are on your way out!

OK, here’s what I did in similar situation.

I resigned (you have to really or it can cause tax issues) but told HR I would not agree to any meetings or phone calls with bully micromanaging arsehole. I would communicate with them only in writing/email.

He was INCANDESCENT which gave me great satisfaction.

You'll need your P45.

You need to end your contract properly to get that.

If you don't turn up they'll probably send the police out for a welfare check

You could try a third option.

Take copies of every snarky and bullying communication (probably paperbased is the best way to avoid accusations of breaching security through emailing things to yourself)
Get signed off sick.
Leave the means for her to continue to contact you so that she further evidences her behaviour.
Submit a grievance, ensuring that she still has the means to further support your case by contacting you.
If it's clear on investigation that they're in danger of a constructive dismissal case, they may be open to negotiating a settlement and agreed reference.
Leave.

Have you got another job lined up already?

I would go to the GP and get signed off. Once you have a sick line, email that and the resignation letter at the same time.

I would also contact ACAS to see if this needs to go to tribunal.

This.

What you want is constructive dismissal.

But in order to have a strong case for that you need to show that you have tried to engage HR and you need to have a strong body of evidence.

Have you tried writing to HR listing all the grievances you have outlined here and asking them to act?

You need to resign properly as others have already said. You have options such as trying to negotiate down the notice period or simply telling them that you’re not working it.

You need to hand in your resignation one way or another to get your P45. Otherwise it can cause issues with the amount of tax you pay in your new role.

If you don't feel able even to send your manager an email, you need to contact HR so they can go through the process of terminating your employment, taking you off the payroll etc.

Officially they will expect you to work your notice, but if you have any annual leave left you can take that within your notice period. You could also see your doctor and ask them to consider signing you off work for mental health reasons, although to be honest, if you've stuck this out for six years I'm sure you can coast to the end for four weeks.

Get signed off sick and hand your notice in

I am very professional and only leave on good terms. As long as you don't ever want a reference or anything from this employer....I'd be be tempted to do what you're thinking. However, I think if I'd put up with it for 8 years I'd just go and work my notice so that references or anything shouldn't be an issue. If you walk out never to be seen again that's ammo for them not to give you a professional reference.

You need to submit a formal grievance as HR cannot ignore that.