…To Ghost Employer

[ThePlumVan]

..not resign, not communicate that I have a new job, literally just block and move on with my life ?

Been in current job 8 years.
Had the most horrendous Line Manager for 6 of those. I work across a matrix structure so am answerable to several Department Managers - but LM is the one who has refused to sign off legitimate expenses with receipts so I no longer submit them, has refused all training/CPD opportunities in that time, micromanages things she knows nothing about, contradicts me, produces meeting minutes that are misleading/inaccurate, requests very shading business practices be carried out and when I refuse has tantrums and tries to do it herself but again she isn’t qualified so can’t do it, won’t sign off annual leave until the week before so it’s too late to book holiday and then says they might have to be cancelled anyway depending on business need so I can never look forward to anything, books evening meetings when I have caring responsibilities, books daytime meetings onsite with no notice when I am working miles away, demands me to drop everything with the other departments when she has something that can wait and they don’t, so I end up working evenings to meet the other deadlines. If I miss a call from her will continually phone me until I pick up even if I’m in meetings, I could go on and on - but basically it’s been awful and has affected my mental health horrendously.

I don’t want to work my notice. I don’t want to see or speak or think of her ever again.
I feel bad for the other Depts, but not enough to go back (currently on annual leave).

YABU - just be professional and work your notice.
YANBU - your life has been hell for long enough, just block them and crack on with your lovely new job.

Yes do it properly. You'll need your p45 and reference for future jobs. You don't have to.work your notice. You could send hr an email to.say today's my last day. At least they'll know to send.you your.p45..I left an.old.job on bad terms, took a few months to.get it,.and I.was emergency taxed for those 3.months. It was annoying.

I would resign, citing the reasons why I find my position untenable. I would ask to be released from my contract of employment with immediate effect but state that I will work my notice if required.
I would go off sick if they insist I work my notice.

Do this. I did this when I was in a similar position. Boss made my life hell, instructed me to do something totally illegal - I was so glad to walk away.

If you don’t resign you’re in breach of contract.

How on EARTH have you tolerated this for SIX YEARS?

I would just go down the professional route of doing it properly. 'When someone else aims low you go high' etc........

HR are never there for the employees. That is fore sure as sure the sun shines in daytime and the moon in night time

I had smiles, laughs and chit chats with HR girlies all the time and the day when my boss said he won't pass my probation ( but actually saying the complete opposite) two weeks ago and these ladies completely froze. No help, no eye contact, nothing, just one cold email for leaving without even a signature, just department

I cannot believe you did this for 6 years. Why?

She'll be baying for blood so best just to get signed off sick.

I had a similar thing in my last job. What I did was hand my notice in and then went immediately to the GP and said how bad the situation is and that I knew it would be worse in my notice period and got signed off. I had no HR department as the company was small and the person was the MD and he took great delight in reminding me I had no one else to complain to.

Once I had resigned and was signed off and had handed back all my laptop phone stuff I blocked everything, however to get to me one individual resorted to using their personal email and phone number to get at me... (I was then so angry and petty I used his personal email and phone and signed him up to whatever telemarketing/porn/call girl sites I could find - childish but I was so angry) It was awful I know how you feel and I am so sorry you have endured 6 years....

This sounds awful. Unfortunately my DH has just been through similar. He was supposed to do 3 months notice. In the end he did 1 month, helped along by telling HR some of the shenanigans and the fact he'd been put on beta blockers for anxiety. When we were looking things up I don't think there's anything much an employer can do if you don't work your notice, other than take you to court for costs which probably isn't worth their time.

Just confirms the conclusion I came to long time ago in that Rank is no indicator of ability. The number of times I have come across it....

Look for a new job even temping work until you find another full time job.

When HR ask why you are leaving ignore it as sounds like they wont do anything about anyway and give them an easy out.

Someone will come along who knows more about this than me, but if you have had a grievance upheld and nothing was done, and your manager actually got worse, then surely you have a claim for constructive dismissal. Your manager is behaving inappropriately by withholding expenses and annual leave and you should be reporting that to their manager and HR. I’d be tempted to get some advice from ACAS or an employment lawyer before pushing the nuclear button.

You need to resign. Otherwise it will look like you have two jobs to hmrc (50% tax) plus your current company will need to formally end your employment, which may take longer than notice period.

Resign, how much annual leave do you have?

Write a formal notice letter then see if you can get signed off on stress (although you may need to declare to new employer?) so id probably work the Notice so you have a clean sickness record.

Definitely put in a complaint about your Line Manager. Not sure why you haven't already though?

Surely there will be tax implications if you start a new job without formally finishing the old? Plus they might later claim you owe them wages.
I agree with others. Grin and bear it for the rest of your notice period or go off sick.

This. I've done it. You need to do it.

Based on how poor HR have been and how much worse the bully will be if you work your notice I'd withhold my notice.

Start the evening before your new job with an email to your old job (HR, payroll and a sympathetic manager if there is one you worked with, even the big boss if you feel brave). State day you have left, you will not be working your notice because of twat micromanager and the potential for them to be more abusive.

Your new job can sort of HMRC, you can also log onto your personal tax account and see what happens.

No-one has mentioned it, but do spend half a day getting screenshots (rather better than forwarding stuff to yourself, as there is no record on their server) of anything you feel might be useful if they tried anything on (like suddenly dismissing you, or suing you for breach of contract). Not that I think they will, but it's one of those things that sod's law says definitely won't happen if you are prepared for it.

Not sure if getting signed off for stress is a good idea if your new employer gets wind of it.

Take a few days off with the shits or similar too, just make sure you keep it under the level where a sick note is needed.

"approach HR , advise about your new role and claim constructive dismissal in view of the LM behaviour. If the evidence is sufficient you could agree a final severance , no notice to serve and they pay you in lieu."

This was good advice apart from telling them you have a new job. If you want to try for constructive dismissal you dont admit you have anew job.

If you have now told them you have a new job then work your notice avoiding the difficult persona s far as you can. There is a lot of covid around at present, it could easily keep you out of work for a week if things get too desperate.

Good to see that you have handed your notice in - don't forget that if you are owed any holidays that you actually take those and reduce the number of days left that you actually have to work and if push comes to shove you can always self certificate a week's sick leave with a dodgy tummy!! This will help you feel a whole lot better and you'll have a break before starting your new job. Good luck!!

Hand in your notice along with a record of all the bullying and description of how it has got worse since the first grievance. Ask to be put on garden leave for the remainder of your notice.

I missed the update.hopefully the notice time passes quickly. Good luck in your new role

I've nothing to add that hasn't been said except to ask why are these arseholes allowed to continually make people's lives a misery year after year even when it causes business losses and good staff to leave. I've worked for nearly 45 years and these bloody people have made my life a misery all that time.⁹

@ThePlumVan can you at least take this year’s accrued annual leave towards the end of the notice period to reduce the number of days until you finish? That would help. If she phones all the time during notice then I would just switch phone off in meetings/leave it in drawer and you decide when you speak to her. Count the days down; she sounds awful.