To have taken my sisters cat to the vet and hope she will pay

[InWithPeaceOutWithStress]

My sister has a 19 year old cat.
Cat has lived at our mums house for a couple of years because my sister has a younger cat and a child and felt the older cat would be happier at my mums house.

Cat has come to stay at my house as my mum has gone on holiday.
Cat is clearly not well - skin and bones, ravenous and thirsty but not putting on weight. I weighed her and she is just over 2kgs. Breathing heavily at times and unsteady on her feet.

I messaged my mum to say I think cat needs to go to vet, I’ve had no response for 3 days. she’s in the U.K., not abroad.

Phoned my sister who agreed I could take her to the vet.
Vet wanted to do blood panel due to suspected hyperthyroidism so I got the ok from sister by text (she is owner so needs to agree). Sisters response to the possible diagnosis was - ‘that sounds expensive’.

Results came back and cat has severe hyperthyroidism. Too weak for surgery so treatment is special diet and pills. I explained this to sister by text and response is “ok”.

I am on the way to pick up pills now. Sister hasn’t asked me how much any of this costs (£300 so far) so is possibly expecting me to pay for it? Not sure how to approach this?

My mothers response when I’ve previously suggested cat is ill and should go to the vets is “she’s just old”.

sisters response when I said cat may also have renal failure, just to warn her that outlook may not be good was “she’s super old I wouldn’t be surprised if she needs to be put down”.

its like they both just think oh she’s old, just let her die.

But she is really suffering with the hyperthyroidism as she eats and eats but doesn’t get nutrition. With treatment she could have quality of life so to me it’s a no brainer to give her that.

I have two cats and I love them ti pieces, can’t imagine letting them come to this. I also have pet insurance for them, she doesn’t. I’m picking up the cost possibly. Should I have stayed out of this? It felt negligent to not take her to the vets whilst under my care and clearly ill.

feel really put off my mum and sister as they seem so heartless. Or am I being a martyr?

not sure how to convince my mum to buy / give cat the special food and pills once the lot I’ve got runs out.

vet needs to do more bloods in 2 weeks to check treatment is working so it may be easier to keep cat with me till then. Treatment will be for life.

I’m considering keeping cat but my partner is not keen because there is an impact on our existing two cats. They’re scared of older cat and have retreated upstairs and have been vomiting so I think they are stressed by her.

AIBU = I should have stayed out of this. Now I’ve got involved I need to suck it up in terms of vet bills and ongoing care.

IANBU = I was right to take cat to vets and sister is the owner and responsible for care, including paying me back.

Your mother isn't suitable to care for a sick, elderly animal. She won't give the medication and doesn't want the responsibility. Tell the vet to pts. They have no reason to refuse. Tell the vet there is no one to care for or pay for the treatment. The cat is being neglected.

I have three cats and adore them, but in that situation I wouldn't be prolonging their life.

The vet has to do a second round of blood tests to make sure the dosage is correct and that the thyroid levels have gone back to the where they should be. Sometimes they have to tweak the dosage.

My 18 year old cat has hyperthyroidism. She's been on meds for a year, is comfortable and happy.

However, something to think about is that getting the tablet down her throat every day is a bit of a battle and can be stressful if you're not confident. Will your mum be able to manage that?

They'll make as much money out of you for a few months then suggest it when it's blindingly obvious there's nothing else to be done.

I'd have cat PTS now and save their suffering.

Your dsis doesn't want to prolong the cats life and is OK with cat being PTS. She doesn't want to pay for expensive treatments or meds. Again, not your cat and so not your decision.
I think you need to clearly engage with her before you incur any further costs

Vet's are businesses - for profits. Putting the cat down is less profitable than medication and treatment. If you had insurance they may well have offered surgery.

No because they can only earn £15-20 profit for that! As opposed to £££ every month trying to keep an ancient cat alive.

You agreed to £300 worth of tests without getting agreement with the owner to pay for that? On an elderly cat who’s owner was happy to let nature take its course (and at this point you have to view your mum as the owner).

sorry think anything beyond the initial appointment fee that your sister agreed to should be covered by you. Clearly both your sister and mum would go for PTS not tests and treatment.

I am shocked. I wasn’t expected this. I thought we would treat her. The vet didn’t mention PTS at all.

And yes, daily pills and treatment will be a struggle. Why make the end of an elderly animal’s life horrible?

You really should have stayed out if it until she returned. It isn't your call and I would be annoyed at the bill too. There is a difference between emergency treatment for an animal in severe distress or pain and treating a long term chronic condition.

No it was £50 for the vet appointment. £50 for a months worth of the special food. £200 for blood panel. Owner agreed to it all but we didn’t discuss costs.

I was writing my post as you updated so I saw that after I posted.

As other people have said vets are all about profit, especially since there are few independents around now.

The cat has hypothyroidism and probable renal failure, it's time to let her go. Your mum and sister don't seem interested so I doubt they'd resist if you suggested the cat was PTS.

My parents had this with a vet with their much loved dog. They were like you and did all the tests/pills etc because they cared so much for him and desperately wanted him to get better but really the vet should have suggest PTS much sooner.

I would PTS

You need to send DSIS a message along the lines of
DSIS, I am unable to afford further treatment for dcat. Please advise what the vet should do next.

I don’t think pills will be an issue for her to be honest. She’s not fussy at all. Wolfs anything down.

It doesn't sound as though the cat will have much longer left, poor thing. Your sister and mother have neglected the cat, and seem heartless. They should have to pay the vet bill.

I had cats for over 40 years, would never have let any of mine ever get to that stage - one did have an underactive thyroid and kidney failure at the age of about 16, and had medication for both conditions, was well-fed, much-loved, and lived to be 19.

The words of someone who has never tried getting pills into a cat.

I have an 18 year old cat that weighs about 2kg and isn’t responding to hyperthyroidism meds ….. she’s thin for sure but doesn’t appear to be in distress or pain and so she’s currently still wandering around the house peeing in places she shouldn’t . Our vet would put her down if we asked but isn’t suggesting that we do if you see what I mean

I’ve been struggling with the idea of knowing when I need to let her go - her sister was pts last year and it was obvious but with this cat I just don’t know. It’s interesting that the consensus is that it’s kinder to usher her along. Maybe I need to think again

My cat didn't have pills - she had a cream stuff rubbed into her outer ear, and a liquid stuff squirted into her mouth (she didn't mind it) or onto her food.

This

The vet's eyeing up a nice juicy bill, that's why. The kindest thing to do with a 19-year-old cat this poorly is to PTS.

If she’s wandering and peeing in places she shouldn’t then it’s likely that she’s going senile. It happened to one of ours and was genuinely heartbreaking how quickly he went downhill. He was incredibly confused in the end and couldn’t even find his way around the house. I would honestly suggest that you let her go sooner rather than later and avoid any suffering.

I would have asked the vet to put the cat to sleep. She doesn’t sound well at all and I wouldn’t be trying to keep an animal with such a poor prognosis alive. Just because you could treat her doesn’t mean you should!

I agree with my two cats it’s would be really hard. But I think it’s possible with this cat as she is known for eating literally anything.