I’m a Brit and I’ve been living in the US for 10 years, in one if the mountain states.
In all honesty, I worry more about the terrible drivers than I do about guns. Healthcare is a bureaucratic nightmare but in my experience is pretty decent - make sure the job is offering good health insurance. Cost of living is much much higher than it was even 2 years ago. If you’re in an eastern state then it’s only a 6-7 hour flight to the UK and there’s lots of them - it’s definitely trickier out west. Where you live is key- I would not live in the southern states because of the humidity.
In saying that, there are a lot of negatives apart from the obvious one of missing family. Politics is a big one. I work in a red area, and the evangelicals have way too much influence. If Trump gets in, which is worryingly likely, healthcare and women’s rights will be gutted. Poverty will skyrocket. Racism is already pretty open and will get even worse.
A major negative that I’ve encountered is the irreversible damage to my career and my self esteem. I had a good career in the UK, now I work in a crappy customer service job which is high stress, crap pay, very poor benefits. I am burnt out but can’t get anything else.
It’s hard to have friendships here too. All the friends I’ve had here were other trailing spouses, who’ve all moved back to their home countries. There’s no one to call up for a coffee, go for a night out, help out in a crisis. It’s extremely lonely and I’m acutely aware that if the shit hits the fan I’m on my own, apart from my husband.
I don’t regret coming here, but I do regret staying. Think very, very carefully before you do it. Come and visit the area you would be living in (a decent company will pay for a sussing-out trip and will set you up with a relocation agent who can take you round houses, schools, answer questions about practicalities such are getting your SSN and driving licence, etc). If you do want to move forward, find out what kind of visa you’d be applying for, and whether it gives you, as the trailing spouse, the right to apply for an Employment Authorization Document (EAD). Does the company have access to a specific bank or credit union, so you can get accounts, credit cards, car loans quickly? Your UK credit history counts for nothing and it’s a lot harder to get up and running without banking access. Will they set you up with an apartment to start with? Renting a place with no credit history is extremely hard.
Good luck whatever you decide.