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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

The post person entered my house.

408 replies

Globules · 30/06/2024 16:12

I've just seen it on my Ring doorbell.

17yr old DD had left the door unlocked for her friend so she didn't have to come down to let them in. Not uncommon.

Post arrived, including a parcel, during this time. When no one answered the door, the post person tried the handle, opened up the door and came into my home.

Granted, DD shouldn't have left the door unlocked, but it doesn't make what the post person did ok.

Just me who thinks it was completely unreasonable for them to have even tried the handle?!

OP posts:
fieldsofbutterflies · 30/06/2024 18:11

I don’t think you should have to keep locking your door just to prevent someone who doesn’t have your permission to open it

What about to prevent burglary?

Wishiwas24again · 30/06/2024 18:12

Not metaphorical ones ! Maybe it’s my age ,

CosFuckThatGuy · 30/06/2024 18:13

What the zeus is a metaphorical kitten, I am dying laughing here

Wolfpa · 30/06/2024 18:14

Why did your daughter not answer the door? Is there a chance she shouted that the door was open as she didn’t want to move?

Cerealkiller4U · 30/06/2024 18:15

magnoliablooms · 30/06/2024 16:31

What's your recorded safe place on the Royal mail app? Have you set one?

Don’t put a safe place people!!!

this is because if your parcels gets stolen it’s your fault. Whereas if your postman puts it in a safe place and it gets stolen then the company should send you a new one as they didn’t fulfil their part of the contract.

Wishiwas24again · 30/06/2024 18:15

When my mum who is no longer with us was worried she’d say she was having kittens , sorry maybe it’s just me

Megifer · 30/06/2024 18:16

Arlanymor · 30/06/2024 17:55

No, the responsibility lies with the person who is taking care of (and being paid for it) the animals.

And the responsibility for not opening the door uninvited in the first place lies with the stranger.

I feel this could go round in circles 🤣

GetThatBloodyFaceOff · 30/06/2024 18:17

AlfrescoPotato · 30/06/2024 16:15

Did they come upstairs and put it in your knicker drawer? Or, as I suspect, pop it inside the doorway? Good grief.

this

Wishiwas24again · 30/06/2024 18:17

Agreed 👍

Wishiwas24again · 30/06/2024 18:17

About going round in circles

fieldsofbutterflies · 30/06/2024 18:18

Megifer · 30/06/2024 18:16

And the responsibility for not opening the door uninvited in the first place lies with the stranger.

I feel this could go round in circles 🤣

Well, yes, but the postman can't be held responsible for the fact that PP is a home boarder who should be securing their home properly.

If you don't want people opening your door, then you lock it - I would have thought that was just basic common sense, lol.

But yes, it's kind of a chicken or the egg question Grinr

Hedgeoffressian · 30/06/2024 18:19

He entered your home. Of course he shouldn’t have done that. Am I suprised most of Mumsnet voted YABU. No 😂

Arlanymor · 30/06/2024 18:19

Megifer · 30/06/2024 18:16

And the responsibility for not opening the door uninvited in the first place lies with the stranger.

I feel this could go round in circles 🤣

You can make circular arguments if you like, but legally it’s very clear. It’s a contract between the owners and the boarder, not a third party. If the boarder doesn’t do enough to secure the animal’s safety then they would be in trouble, not a postie who popped something inside the door.

WeMeetInFairIthilien · 30/06/2024 18:19

I have had something similar, but with a sickening twist.

June/July 2021.

I was in the kitchen, batch cooking prior to my return to work from maternity leave.

I had the kitchen door open to the hall, so I could hear if DS awoke from his nap. I could see the front door, and porch door.

I had the backdoor (from the kitchen to the back garden) open, as it was hot. The side gate, from the front garden to the back garden was closed.

I saw something in the corner of my eye, span round to see the postman inside my kitchen, putting a parcel down on the floor.

I screamed in shock, said something like "you made me jump" he smirked and walked off.

He had not tried the front door, because I would have seen him through the glass, and he could have left the parcel in the porch.

Instead, he walked around the side of my home, opened the side gate and then walked in through the backdoor and into the kitchen.

I did not complain, because he had just started to wear a skirt, full face of makeup and a long brown wig, and I was terrified of being accused of being transphobic.

I'd seen him over the last couple of months dressed in the male uniform, with stubble/male voice). This was the second time I'd seen him dressed that way. If I had been accused of transphobia, I'd have lost my job.

However, I wish I had complained.

He did similar to a neighbour, who found him in her back garden.

I saw him a few more times, still dressed in a long wig/excessive makeup, but driving the post vans, rather than walking the rounds. I did wonder if someone else had complained.

Caveat - dress/present how you like. However head been dressed, he still crosses the boundary that day (in more ways than one).

fungipie · 30/06/2024 18:20

just tell them, next time leave the parcel on doorstep to be nicked!

Mumwithbaggage · 30/06/2024 18:20

Happens all the time round here! But that's the countryside for you.

Inthedeep · 30/06/2024 18:20

Are you sure it was the actual postman? The shirt doesn’t look like a Royal Mail shirt, the white stitching looks wrong on the red shirt/top.

As a side note, the postwoman who delivers to my parents house in France once walked in and put a parcel on the kitchen table whilst I was upstairs, I hadn’t heard the knock. I came down just as she was leaving 😂.

DerekFaker · 30/06/2024 18:20

NigelHarmansNewWife · 30/06/2024 17:15

I'm concerned about your daughter's personal safety. Anyone could let themselves in. I'm willing to bet she found the parcel and hadn't heard him ring the doorbell, which led you to review the footage.

She's 17 ffs!

Do people seriously lock their doors during the day when they are at home??

nosleepforme · 30/06/2024 18:22

I happen to agree, he should in no way have tried the door and walked in. He had no warrant or permission to enter, this isn’t a judgement call scenario.
if op was walking around unsuitable, or if something further had happened like an assault, we’d all be asking why rm allows their employees to think it’s ok just to walk in!!!

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 30/06/2024 18:22

So they tried the handle to see if they can leave a parcel in the vestibule or something and did you a favour rather than a sorry we missed you card?

I couldn't get worked up about it.

fieldsofbutterflies · 30/06/2024 18:22

Arlanymor · 30/06/2024 18:19

You can make circular arguments if you like, but legally it’s very clear. It’s a contract between the owners and the boarder, not a third party. If the boarder doesn’t do enough to secure the animal’s safety then they would be in trouble, not a postie who popped something inside the door.

Yes, exactly.

If I left my dog with a home boarder and he ran out of their property because they hadn't locked the door, it's not the postman or delivery driver I'd be angry with!

Megifer · 30/06/2024 18:22

fieldsofbutterflies · 30/06/2024 17:56

Nope.

Legally speaking, a home boarder has a duty to ensure that dogs remain safe on their property - leaving an external door unlocked goes against that completely.

Ah tbf I'm not thinking of legalities, just whats the done thing. Can't imagine postie would feel good in that situation either.

Maybe it's just different norms? It's genuinely just not the done thing in the area I live to have a delivery driver or postie open your door 😱 I'm really surprised when I read about this on MN.

Iseeyoupekingduck · 30/06/2024 18:22

This has happened to us a couple of times.

Epicaricacy · 30/06/2024 18:22

DerekFaker · 30/06/2024 18:20

She's 17 ffs!

Do people seriously lock their doors during the day when they are at home??

yes...

MasterBeth · 30/06/2024 18:23

DerekFaker · 30/06/2024 18:20

She's 17 ffs!

Do people seriously lock their doors during the day when they are at home??

Yes. Of course. Why wouldn't you?