My husband has the heating on

[SarahYou]

We're in a small flat in the UK and it's boiling. He's washed some clothes and decided to put the heating on to dry them over the radiators.

"We" tried drying them over a drying rack next to an open window and he decided that they smelled bad after 30 mins so washed them again.

Now every radiator in the flat is blasting out heat and I've got a headache. He won't turn them off.

Is this normal?? Im so pissed off!

Please google Women's Aid.
They will be able to help and advise.

You feel guilty because he’s done a total number on you.

No. He's not the best husband at all. Ever. He's a controlling, violent and sbusive husband.

You say he's a good person 99% of the time. But if 99 out of 100 random chocolates are harmless and one is poisonous would you still eat them?

Don't apologise, you've nothing to be sorry for. It sounds like your eyes are opening to just how awful he is and that's a good thing.

I'm so sorry. Is the football making it worse? Do contact women's aid if you can. They won't judge or tell you what to do. They'll listen and understand.

But he won't do anything for you, he won't behave like a rational person doing washing

Get a heated clothes horse and shut it in another room, I do find if I don't dry tracksuit bottoms and hoodies either outside or on the heated clothes horse they do smell musty. X

I would murder him

Is he? He sounds like a fucking prick

I did my bedding today and it dried in about 2 hours in front of the window. Just meant I had to keep moving stuff about but it all dried lovely.

You can't stay with someone who scares you. He's the one who should feel guilty. For the shitty way he treats you.

Wow. Open your eyes OP.

People though the sun shone out of my paranoid, abusive, lazy ex's backside. They didn't have to live with him.

What do you mean 'you' have to?? If he's that particular he needs to do his own washing.

Op. Ask yourself why you don't have any female friends. Is it because of him?
He doesn't sound like a good husband. He sounds like an aggressive manipulative all round nasty piece of work.

Absolutely insane!

Well I'd be just switching that heating right back off again and telling him to stop being such a prat. Why don't you feel able to do this? The dynamic in your relationship is worrying.

He isn't nice at all. Batshit crazy. Definitely middle aged crisis and entitlement

Won't do the fabric of your home any good

He won't do anything for you

The heating is on in this heat. It's making you unwell. He won't turn the heating off. You are scared to ask him to do something that benefits you.

I'm guessing you are often too scared to ask him for anything

So no. He will not do anything for you. Anything he does will either be to benefit him or make you feel bad.

Please contact woman's aid.

NRTFT so apologies if already mentioned, but if you do an extra spin on your wash then they’ll dry quicker too. I also put each load in the dryer for 7 mins before shaking and hanging up on the airer (or line in this weather). This helps ‘steam’ them a bit and helps reduces creases so only need to iron the odd thing.

We also have a dehumidifier for in the winter which doesn’t cost a lot to run.

But to answer your question, he is very unreasonable. Ridiculous, in fact!

Bloody hell id literally faint if the heating was on in this weather
Assuming you don't have room for an outside airer, there are lots of options
Ceiling airer( Sheila maid?)
Over bath
Radiator airers( radiator off!)
Balcony airer
Dehumidifier
Not to mention the cost

Forgot to say
I'm sorry he's abusive to you behind closed doors
It's not unusual to present a " lovely image to the rest of the world
Please don't apologise or think it's your fault, and you can't leave because you've been with him for a long time
You deserve a life free of fear and freedom to make your own choice
Please tell someone
You can go to any boots store pharmacy and ask for Ani and they will help you, if it's easier
Womens aid when you can too of course.
I lived with an violent alcoholic who was lovely sober, gradually the drunk person outweighed the sober one and I ended up with a broken shoulder
Please take care

OP, if he would do anything for you when sober, he would never drink again given that he is physically abusive when drunk. If you suggested this, what would he say?