To think these are typical meal times/bed times in the UK

[Verybritishtimings]

Breakfast - between 6 and 8 (weekday/weekend dependant). Accept will be later if you have a long lie in - I have small kids so it doesn't happen.
Lunch - between 12-1.30
Dinner - generally between 6-8 - could be as early as 5 for small children.

Bedtime - between 9.30-midnight for adults under normal circumstances, no special events. Between 7-8.30 for youngish children.

I have a friend who constantly gaslights me about this. I'm crazy that my kids go to bed at 7 (they are ready for bed then and always wake before 7 regardless). I invite her round at 2pm and she brings HER OWN LUNCH because 'i eat so early and she couldn't possibly'. Is she trying to be every so continental or something?!

This is light hearted, don't care when people eat on their own time but my timings align with the majority of the population and the work/school day do they not?!

Yep, your rough times are correct

I don't think you understand what gaslighting is.

Your friend just disagrees with you. That's all.

Your times are about right though.

No, I do. Perhaps I didn't express it well but she gives off the distinct impression that I am the odd one and my timings are weird. She's making me doubt myself. And the fact that she just couldn't possibly eat her lunch before she arrives at my house (to accommodate a social engagement) compounds it.

I'd say your timings are about right though I never bothered sticking to them much myself.

Gaslighting is rewriting events to suit your own agenda, and arguing that your version of what happened is the right one. It is not just disagreeing with somebody's opinion.

Your timings are absolutely normal. Given your broad range I'm left wondering what times she considers standard?

I'd have put lunch at 12-2 as some places have 12-1 as lunch hour others 1-2pm for lunch but for the rest I would suspect that 90% of the UK eat at those times 90% of the time

Your timings for eating arent outlandish, but no way I have I ever eaten breakfast as early as 6am or lunch as early as 12pm. Dinner before 7pm only when my children were very young. So I’d say some (lots) of people might eat later than you.

No need for your friend to be bitchy about it. People are different.

Isn't it also making someone question their reality? As if I'm been presuming I'm normal all this time, when really my family operates in some kind of parallel universe! That's really the vibe she gives off!

https://www.newportinstitute.com/resources/mental-health/what_is_gaslighting_abuse/#:~:text=Gaslighting%20is%20a%20form%20of%20psychological%20abuse%20or%20manipulation%20in,their%20own%20judgment%20and%20intuition.

I think because she has pre school age kids and a non standard job she shifts everything a few hours later. Which is totally fine - good for her! But 10pm is not ludicrously early for me to go to bed, for example. I think she might get a shock when she has to get her kids up and breakfasted and off to school.

Not for us or anyone I know. We never do lunch and my children have never ever been in bed at 7pm, much closer to 10/10.30, the same time as us. I'd hate my kids to be stuck in bed that early.

Your dinner and bedtimes are super early for me. Dinner around 8/8.30. Bed closer to 11.

Oh wow, I wouldn't like that at all. My evenings after the kids go to bed at 7 (or 6 until they were at school) are precious. And how do they get up for school? But like many other posters say, everyone is different, and as long as it works for your family then it's right for you.

You don't know anyone who has small children in bed before 10-10.30 .... Or eaten lunch at 12 (don't these children go to school?) not one person you know...I find that impossible to believe to be honest.

To clarify, my times are to 'start'. So one could start lunch at 1.30 or dinner at 8 etc.

I don't think they sound abnormal but I prefer things pushed back personally so lunch around 2ish and dinner 8.30/9. I have a 5 year old and he's relatively flexible at the weekend. Today he had breakfast after swimming so around 10.30, lunch about 3pm and has just had his tea.

Are you my friend? 😂

I think because she has pre school age kids and a non standard job

Bingo. Due to my job, lunch is usually 3pm and dinner anything between 8 and 11pm. Even ignoring my (“continental”) background of growing up eating at different times than in the UK, it’s still because of my job that I have a skewed view of what’s normal.

Your timings are the most average I would say, yes. Doesn’t mean your friend’s timings aren’t just as real, to her. I know I don’t eat at normal times, but I still joke / insist with my friends about how early they eat. Although I don’t think either one of us spends so much headspace on the topic 😅

Breakfast 7.30. Lunch 12.30, Tea 5.30. Bath and in bed for 7pm was the rule when my DC were small (they are now in their early 30s).

As they got older tea moved to 6pm as I didn't get in from work til after 5, and obviously bed times stretched out, but were always before 9pm til they hit teenage years.

I guess people do what suits them, but your timings sound pretty normal to me.

Your timings are quite early for me but everyone is different. You do what’s suits you she dose what suits her. You have already said she’s on a much later schedule then you.

We eat breakfast at 7.30 on weekdays, lunch at 12, dinner at 5, bedtime for 9 year old Is 8pm and 10 year old is 9. I’m usually in bed about 8.30 and asleep by 9.30/10 😂

Your timings seem absolutely reasonable / typical for me.

“How do they get up for school” keeps being asked on here - most countries don’t put kids to bed at 7-8pm. I grew up going to bed at 10pm (as early as primary) and we had to be out the door at 8:30am. It was never an issue - wake up would be around 7:30 which gives plenty of sleep, that’s 9.5 hours which is not that little for a primary aged child.