To think these are typical meal times/bed times in the UK

[Verybritishtimings]

Breakfast - between 6 and 8 (weekday/weekend dependant). Accept will be later if you have a long lie in - I have small kids so it doesn't happen.
Lunch - between 12-1.30
Dinner - generally between 6-8 - could be as early as 5 for small children.

Bedtime - between 9.30-midnight for adults under normal circumstances, no special events. Between 7-8.30 for youngish children.

I have a friend who constantly gaslights me about this. I'm crazy that my kids go to bed at 7 (they are ready for bed then and always wake before 7 regardless). I invite her round at 2pm and she brings HER OWN LUNCH because 'i eat so early and she couldn't possibly'. Is she trying to be every so continental or something?!

This is light hearted, don't care when people eat on their own time but my timings align with the majority of the population and the work/school day do they not?!

i think your timing is about right as well.

We are;

Me up at 5 am
DCs up at 6 am.
Breakfast by 7 am
leave for school at 7.30 am
lunch around noon
Dinner around 6 - 6.30 pm
bed around 9.30 pm for us all - lights off around 10.

Dcs 14 and 12.

Bringing her own lunch is very rude IMO.

All this angst!

I adapt mealtimes to whatever suits at the time.

When DC were small, we worked around preschool and school. I recall cooking and eating around 5pm with them and DH eating his later when home from work.

As teens, we'd eat later, and fit around clubs.
Everyone had a packed lunch but I have absolutely no idea when anyone else ate theirs, or whether the DC bothered with breakfast (unlikely). Not into micromanagement!

Now DH and I do our own thing and one of us will cook dinner as and when we get round to it.

Never had any issues with behaviour or heaven forbid this 'hangry' nonsense.

The OP is talking about generally accepted norms though, I'm just wondering how it comes about that you know everyone you meets bedtime, maybe I'm out of line but my friends don't even know when I go to bed mevr mind everyone else I happen to know

Have I missed out on a social convention of some sort?

I go to bed when I'm tired rather than to a schedule anyway so if I met you I wouldn't even be able to answer your question

I adapt mealtimes to whatever suits at the time.

Same, meals fit around everything else, not life around mealtimes. If I was going to a friend's house for a bbq and expecting to eat at 8 then we'd take a plate of nibbles or give children a toastie at 4 or 5pm. Children tired and they'd take themselves to a sofa with a blanket on it for that purpose, or be shown to a bed.

The evening news 😂 Or broadcast of a major national event on some occasions. BBC basically. We’re talking age 7+ obviously.

But yes I’m increasingly realising my family is weird 😂 I’m just more used to kids fitting around adults’ lives once they’re in school or doing their own thing such as homework or having a friend over, so adults not being limited in what they can do while kids are awake, apart from maybe 1-2 things.

We just avoided 15 rated films or programmes which I am rarely interested in anyway. Anything slightly inappropriate goes over their heads or they play rather than watch as they aren't interested.

I follow your pattern roughly. On a work/school day breakfast is 7am ish, lunch is between 12-1.30 depending what time I get out on our lunch rota, my preferred dinner time is 5/6pm but if I'm on a 6.30 finish it can be as late as 8pm but that is the latest for us.

My kids are pretty much grown now but when they were preschoolers they would go to bed 7/7.30pm after cbeebies bedtime hour. I used to love my evenings! It crept up as they grew up and often they go later than me now. I'm in bed between 10.30 and midnight on a work night.

I think things have changed a little with working parents and children in nursery as the evening routine can start later for those families, dinner and bedtime are probably later so they can spend time together.

I have breakfast around 10am at my desk during the week, don't bother with lunch and then have dinner super early as soon as I finish work around 5ish as I'm starving by then. I go to bed early (around 9.30/10) as I'm a lark and usually up by 5.30/6am.

I'm not sure, maybe you have. Certainly my friends all know when we go to bed/haven't slept/are knackered etc.....just a normal part of every day conversations we have.

Fair play. Hats off to anyone who only needs an hour before school. Could never have done that with mine. Factor in showers (or at least wash), clean teeth, breakfast, dress and walk to school. That’s being organised and putting clothes and school bags out ready the night before and pre-packing lunch box. Always needed more than an hour.

Isn’t that what the friend is doing? Asserting that it’s normal to lunch after 2.0 and that OP is weird in eating earlier?She’s not just disagreeing, she’s saying her version is shared by everyone else and it’s OP who is out of kilter.

When we lived in a Mediterranean country, DDs started school at 7.30am. We left the house at 7am... they were definitely not up until 10pm at night, as were none of their friends. The latest seemed to be about 8pm. Even the teens seemed to go around 9ish at the absolute latest... their bus left our village at 6.45am. (They finished school at 1pm)

I think brimging a pack lunch is odd / a bit extreme but if you know 2 is difficult for her, why not just invite her for 3 ?

They showered at night when they were little. I was up an hour earlier and showered and had my coffee and some time to myself, and made the lunches then. It was only dress, breakfast, teeth, go.

I don’t mind those programs and my kids enjoy them but I also like watching adult themed shows like House of Dragon. Definitely not suitable for kids! When they’re in bed is my only time to do so.

This!

And so many people on this thread doing the same thing with the 'everyone I know goes to bed at 1am', 'why on earth would you want time apart from your children', 'we just eat when we're hungry, doesn't everyone?'. It's the faux 'shocked' that gets me. Pretty sure the inference is 'how could you be so horribly conventional, when I'm just so free range'.

I think the consensus is my times are normal for the majority of the UK population.

Quite surprised that there was no real deep dive on the etiquette of someone bringing a packed lunch to your house when you invited them round for a cuppa!

I'm only occasionally interested in the odd 15-rated film, so I'd just stay up late for that or just ask them to play in rooms early.

midday is very early for lunch in my opinion but I wouldn’t bother to comment if someone else chose to eat it then. I usually eat mine around 2 and have dinner at 8ish so I guess if you’re having dinner closer to 6 then it’s the same difference. It’s weird that your friend makes you feel bad about it but not weird that she brings her own food as I wouldn’t be wanting to eat lunch any time before 1 at the very earliest.

Actually I retract that - it is weird to bring your own food to someone’s house in this situation regardless of when you usually eat lunch!

I'd find the bringing lunch thing weird. Unless theres some sort of medical reason for eating at strict set times you'd just eat earlier wouldn't you?

Each to their own but we personally don’t follow those timings. Little one may get his lunch and dinner within those timings but nothing else follows for us.

That,

she is being bitchy and should mind her own business. If she doesn’t like when you eat, she can say « no, thank you. » and come later 🤷🏼‍♀️

she isn’t really friendly, is she…

Your timings are bang on. Your friend is an idiot 😀

I think your bedtimes are fair.
Mealtimes standard southern mealtimes.

I'd ask if she's from the north but obviously not if she thinks your timings are early (she's the weird one)....maybe it gets gradually later the further south you come from....IOW perhaps 👀😳