To think these are typical meal times/bed times in the UK

[Verybritishtimings]

Breakfast - between 6 and 8 (weekday/weekend dependant). Accept will be later if you have a long lie in - I have small kids so it doesn't happen.
Lunch - between 12-1.30
Dinner - generally between 6-8 - could be as early as 5 for small children.

Bedtime - between 9.30-midnight for adults under normal circumstances, no special events. Between 7-8.30 for youngish children.

I have a friend who constantly gaslights me about this. I'm crazy that my kids go to bed at 7 (they are ready for bed then and always wake before 7 regardless). I invite her round at 2pm and she brings HER OWN LUNCH because 'i eat so early and she couldn't possibly'. Is she trying to be every so continental or something?!

This is light hearted, don't care when people eat on their own time but my timings align with the majority of the population and the work/school day do they not?!

I spent my entire childhood in Spain and my parents definitely had adult only time! We just had a babysitter.

It really does depend on what your kids are like and how much sleep they need. I have one definitely night owl and one too young to say. We start the bedtime routine for the older one (who is 4) at 8pm and she is usually asleep by 9pm and up between 7:15-7:30am. Meal times are set at nursery during the week. At weekends it's breakfast about 8:30, lunch about 12:45 and dinner about 18:45. Works for us.

I agree with you and your timings are pretty standard and allow for a lot of flexibility. I still pretty much follow my childhood routine, breakfast when I wake (can be before 6 most days), lunch around 12-12.30 and dinner around 5-6pm. Very early for some but I go to bed early and don’t like eating late. When the kids were younger and I worked in the office more dinner was a bit later but now on my office days I’m home by 3.30-4 and log back on at home so I can still eat before 6. Obviously some days I stay later and then I eat later. My kids are grown up now, youngest is 16 and prefers to cook her own food so apart from when son is home from Uni I just cook for myself and eat when I want. I couldn’t last until 2pm for lunch or 9pm for dinner

I find it very odd she brings a packed lunch with her.

Yes I lived in Spain for a year and just saw loads of toddlers asleep in pushchairs instead of a bed to be honest.

I don't understand "adult time" either. My DC always went with me to see my friends etc, their kids were always included. I love spending time with my DC, and he loves being part of the friends group. He is now fiends with my fiends children, I think its really lovely.

edited: I also went on holidays on my own with my son since he was 9 months, we travelled a lot and I never felt like he should have not been there. I love his company!

Where is your friend from? Different cultures eat at different times. I’m Irish and nobody in my family back at home eat lunch at 12, I’m often waiting for someone to offer me food and nobody seems to think of lunch until about 3. I eat like you do as I worked with children so have that habit, also lived in the US and they eat dinner/ lunch really early compared to Europe.

And what exactly is wrong with that?))

Also my in laws live in Spain and SIL and BIL go out for dinner on their own all the time… MIL has the kids! I must tell them they’re doing ‘being Spanish’ wrong!

I do loads with my kids but I have friends,hobbies and a husband too. I like to spend one-on-one time with them too. You have to be constantly vigilant with very young children - I personally couldn't function without a break from them.

Would you have a peer-reviewed study, performed by local researchers and health professionals on a larger number of children, published anywhere other than in Spain’s “leading expat newspaper”?

Because if you look for actual facts about this national issue Spain seems to be facing, there isn’t that much that proves this “article”.

I’m not saying children should go to school tired - apart from the negative health consequences, the brains absolutely do need recovery time in order to function at their best.

But let’s stop spreading siesta myths all around - no school in Spain has kids napping at lunchtime past the age of 4 or 5. The culture and society there are totally different - commutes aren’t much of a thing for example. Children (and teens) spend maybe 10-15 mins a day max walking or being driven to school - on Mumsnet / UK people say that teenagers travelling up to 90 min to their secondary school is normal. Lunch breaks are long (up to 2 hours), so there is no eating a sandwich in a rush and going straight back into a lesson. Life is paced differently and energy is spent slower.

The only children who have long commutes and / or earlier start times are those in bilingual / international schools, which can only be afforded by the very wealthy.

Nothing particularly wrong with it but it's not the communal utopia some people make it out to be. And suggests the children might be somewhat tired....

I understand but I never felt like this, maybe because I'm quite neurotic anyway and quite used to it)

She will 🤣

Your timings are normal although I'd have said dinner 5-7pm.... unless eating out. Most nights I'm in bed before the kids (teens) as I'm up at 6am.

I don't think its a "utopia", just a different culture. Kids can sleep quite soundly in the pushchair.

Were your parents Spanish?

I’m not saying Spanish parents don’t have adult-only time. They just don’t have it in the same way a UK parent does - eg kids in bed at 7:30/8pm, adults downstairs watching TV or finishing the chores of the day.

Yes, both Spanish (well, my dad is half French).

In our house lunch is been 1 and 2.30. Dinner varies between 4.30 and 8 pm depending on who is doing what and my kids (currently 9 and 6) are never in bed before 9.30pm. They have zero issue getting up for school. Right now one is playing a board game and the other is running about in the garden with her cousin.

I don't think any of my friends with similarly aged kids pack them off to bed so early especially in the summer when we want to make the most of the daylight.

That said, whilst your timings dont work for my family...I'd never bring a pack lunch to visit a friend unless we were having a picnic.

I'd put lunch at 12 to 2, though I have been known to get something later on a weekend. If I need to go to the market for eggs, then we may have a late breakfast at around half 9, then something very light midafternoon. Especially summer weekends, everything can be later. Weekdays sound right.

Never had children in bed at 7 as they were sleeping around 11 hours at the longest at night, so 8pm tended to work.

Totally normal for Spanish parents to get a babysitter in every few weeks and go to dinner.

I would be more surprised if they had hours of adult-only time every single evening, or if said babysitter was putting you to bed by 8pm then spending hours in silence in the living room

But then as is the point of this thread, each family and child is different - so of course there are Spanish families who will have typical British routines, and viceversa!

Weekends could be up to an hour later, so might be half 8 might be 9pm bedtime on a Friday or Saturday or holiday day eve. Depends on tiredness but it's nice to stay up later in summer.

Oh absolutely not. As I said above, due to the weather is was completely normal for us to stay up late, as otherwise we wouldn’t get any time outside (far too hot in the middle of the day). I grew up in Madrid so in the winter we’d have a more typically ‘British’ routine, as it was cold. The weather is by far the main reason for the differences in routine between Spain and the U.K.

Even when they were babies?

Also, just because it’s different in Spain it doesn’t mean it’s better. I have plenty of experience of both Spain and the U.K. and there are pros and cons to both ways of doing things. My children get far more sleep than I did as a child though and I think that’s of a huge benefit to them; they are never tired and grumpy, for a start, whereas I remember being tired a lot!

Mine were in bed later as babies than when they were toddlers. Earliest bedtime was after dropping the afternoon nap, nighttime sleep peaked at around 11 hours.

Your timings are inline with mine. I eat lunch at 12. Clearly also ridiculously early. 😉