Date wanted me to buy her coke

[MixtapeEssential]

I went on a second date with a woman, the first date had been good, no issues at all.

We arranged to go for a drink, she insisted on buying me a beer since I had picked up the the tab on our first date.

All was going well, we had a couple of afternoon drinks and strolled around chatting. After a little while, my date said she was hungry and shall we stop for something to eat. I told her I didn’t want to spoil my dinner but was happy to order a little starter and sit with her while she ate.

She picked a very smart place. While we were were waiting for our table, she told me she didn’t have any money but was it alright to sit and eat at the window table. I was a little suprised and put on the spot. I may have been alright with that at one point in time, but I was currently short on funds myself.

I told her quietly and discreetly let’s go for a walk, and explained that I had dinner waiting for me and preferred to eat there due to being short on funds, but that I knew a very good quality tasty food truck close by where she could pick up something. She declined.

We continued chatting nicely and strolling for a few minutes, at which point she sat down on a bench and asked me if I wanted to do some “gear”. I told her I wasn’t into that but she was welcome to if she really felt like it.
She got her phone out and began texting her “connection”, asking if that was alright. I told her sure, but I thought she didn’t have any money. She quietly put her phone away looking disappointed.

At this point I just wanted to go home, and told her so, she appeared very excited and said she wanted to come with me, I told her that wasn’t possible.

On the way to the station, we passed a really buzzing place and she wanted to go in for a quick drink.
Being thirsty myself at this point, I agreed, we waited at the door to be let in, at which point, she again said, but I have no money.

I hugged her goodbye and left.

Was I being unreasonable? Is this all quite common now? I have been out of the dating game for a while.

She was otherwise very nice, very attractive, and didn’t look like a drug addict at all, I know that lots of people use coke recreationally without being addicts.

@MixtapeEssential
Precisely

To quote Lil Kim:

We independent women, some mistake us for whores
I'm sayin', "Why spend mine when I can spend yours?"

This is a very valid and reasonable point.

Many people I've known (as I'm not in my 20's anymore!) Have had cocaine habits in the earlier years (so still have it 10 years later) from starting on social use. Part of me feels she might have been using you a bit for your money, as other say, stay clear. She'll never have any money if she has a coke habit.

I'm on the dating scene, and no this isn't normal behaviour that I've seen thankfully. Clearly some very dodgy stuff that you have managed to get away from, but don't let it change your thinking on dating genuine people

Sounds like a scam to me, and you made yourself a mark by generously paying for everything on the first date. I doubt she's the one in charge of running it. The goal was probably to get you to go back to the hotel room and either rob you (or worse) or get pictures/film of you snorting coke with her and turn it into a blackmail situation. She's probably being used to target gay women because a straight woman would be less likely to go back to a hotel room with a random man, but she's possibly targeting men as well. I doubt anything she told you about herself was true. I'd say you've had a lucky escape. The whole OLD thing makes my blood run cold tbh. No one much seems to have a good experience and the risks are huge imo.

Run

Dodged a bullet!!

Absolutely outrageous of her.You have had a very lucky escape there. Weird that she had a hotel room booked. I have heard of prostitute's in the States booking a cheap hotel rooms by the hour, can't believe that someone would behave like she did on a second date. Was she normal on the first date?

sounds like a honey trap.

I actually thought you wouldn't buy her a drink of coke, thought you were being tight. You had a LUCKY escape my friend, if you’re asking people to buy you drugs because you’re skint that’s not recreational that’s a drug addiction.
Think of it as a gift of knowledge about what it could’ve become later on down the line. Also, no this is not modern dating norm.

You are overthinking ALL of this and are spending too much mental energy on explaining why she did this, that or the other.

She is a drug addict. And she does not manage her funds well. Walk away and let it go.

I think she was winding you up since you came across so tight and financially challenged over food. ‘Had dinner saved for later’ honestly sound like an 18 year old

Sounds very dodgy if you ask me, trying to get you to take her home or come to her hotel - I wouldn't be surprised if she had accomplices and were planning to rob you 😬 you've had a lucky escape!

She sounds terrible but you shouldn't be dating if your broke. Deal with your money situation first then date, women come later

He said he was broke so they would have had nothing to rob. She was just a weirdo

She's using, so drop her like a lead balloon.

OP is a woman.

Thank you for sharing this. Compulsory viewing for many perhaps.

Read all the OP’s posts people, it’s not difficult!

Oh my god I thought you were going to be getting grumpy over a can of coke... But no, this is INSANE. Run for the hills!

My guess is, she had a room and a 'date' lined up for financial reasons.

Agree with this 1000% - it's not cool for anyone to be shaken down for cash on a date

Would love to know which 3% said YABU. 🤣 you are deffo not unreasonable, she sounds like a complete loser. I wouldn’t waste a second more of your time on her. Sad cow

Block and RUN!