To report my neighbour for indecent exposure in his garden?

[jumbojumbo]

On regular occasions when I look out of my bedroom window at the back of my house, I have seen the elderly neighbour opposite standing fully naked in his back garden. Not only this but he is touching himself, and stands right by his back door clearly wanting people to see. It's absolutely disgusting, and bothering me quite a bit, especially since I have young children.

I have looked into indecent exposure but this seems to need to be in a public place, not sure whether since this is his own garden whether that would count?

Does anyone know if I can report this and whether anything is likely to be done about it?

Could you not shout out the window "put it away you dirty old git before I ring the police"

I remember getting flashed at as a kid/teenager people used to joke about it sketch shows would have men in macs and it would be "hilarious " it isn't hilarious its horrific, there used to be an old man do it at his window when we walked home from school, nobody did anything just laughed at "old jim"

Could you put up a fence?

I'd knock first and tell him that your children have witnessed this (whether they have or not) and that if you see it again you will be reporting him. Then if it happens again call 101 and explain that he is doing it in full view of children and that he is aware they can see him. Police will take it very seriously if he is knowingly masturbating in front of children.

If you don't want to knock, put a note through his letterbox.

Bloody hell. Only on MN would you find someone who suggests a woman goes and speaks to a strange man who's masturbating in public.

Just to update everyone - I called 101, they took it very seriously and sent out an emergency response straight away. which I didnt expect tbh. The police have then just visited me to say they spoke to him very harshly about it, and they got him on body camera admitting to it and saying he is sorry and won't do it again.

Hoping the police visit shocks him and he doesn't do it again.

Thanks everyone for your advice.

This is visible from my upstairs rooms.

That is really great news. A similar thing happened to my elderly mother with a neighbour. None of the other neighbours believed her as he was such a 'nice guy' and she was more or less ostracised from neighbourhood events. We believed her of course and my brother in law did have a few sharp words with the man and he backed off. After she had died we heard that he had been arrested and imprisoned for abusing his grandchildren. I wished so much my mum had been alive to have known that her suspicions were justified.

I think you did the right thing - in situations like this, especially when there may well be a mental health component that isn't clear yet, it's always better to involve the police from an early point so that they can get someone help (or punishment) rather than trying to deal with it yourself. You may well find that things don't improve despite the warning in which case keep letting the police know so they can build up a picture of the behaviour.

'@fortifiedwithtea
If you are that bothered could you out a note through his door or actually speak to him?'

This is a daft suggestion.

The OP should not directly engage with a potential sex perv/exhibitionist or even someone who is trying to attract the attention of children...

OP, ring the police as suggested and leave them to act on this.

They can also do a welfare check and involve social services if this is related to a health condition (dementia, mental health issues...).

@fortifiedwithtea you seriously suggested that your daughter go and confront a man who was masturbating in public? I have young adult children and my mind is blown by this.

That’s good.😃

Someone local to me got done for indecent exposure in his own house. He answered the door in an indecent manner, and was reported, charged and plead guilty.

So no, it doesn't have to be in a public place. Good luck!

"If you are that bothered"??? In what world are women supposed to be not "that bothered" about a naked man deliberately masturbating in their full view? An accidental exposure to neighbours while naked inside your house is nothing like what is happening here.

Missed the update (and managed to quote the op.. two big faux pas in one post.. sorry).

That's great news op.

Someone being briefly and unwittingly visible while naked in their own home is very, very different to someone standing in the garden and masturbating, which is what the OP’s neighbour is doing. Putting a note through someone’s door to say “Hi neighbour, would mind stopping committing sex offences against me and my children, please?” is not going to help anyone.

I feel sick reading this. Absolute vile vile man.

Report today. Hope you're ok. I'd find that so upsetting.

I'm sat waiting to have something to eat in nandos an put me off my food now

Good result OP. I know someone who reported a neighbour for wanking in view of the street and the man was prosecuted.

I'm surprised by that. The officer I spoke to today seemed to think that if he was in his own house, nothing would happen to him. He even said if he was just naked in his garden it would be difficult to find a crime. But it was the masturbating part that crossed the line.

This really annoys me, why should she be the one putting up a fence , or averting her eyes !
Smacks of victim blaming to me , but I may be over sensitive.
He's wanking in public view . It's a police issue not an OP issue...

Someone round here used to do that in their bedroom window and they were charged by the police. Definitely report!

When I said 'in an indecent manner', I didn't just mean naked. I don't remember the specifics though.

I’m glad you reported the pervert op.

More often than not, men who exhibit this kind of behaviour have already committed or go on to commit other disgusting sex crimes. It should absolutely be taken seriously.

I think the law depends on whether he is intentionally 'outraging public decency'.

If he thinks he is being discreet and not overlooked, that is very different from blatantly masterbating, knowing someone is watching.

I'd call the non-emergency number and ask their advice. Most adults are capable of averting their eyes. But if he was 'putting on a show' in front of children, that would be completely unacceptable.

Well done OP.