WhatsApp group being ruined by underwear pics

[Boreoffwithyournakedpics]

I don't really know if I'm overreacting here.

I'm in a WhatsApp group with some mums originally from reception. Our kids are teens now. We are loose friends for years, have a night out about twice a year and a summer get together with the DC. These gatherings usually have about half the group there so while we keep up-to-date with the chatting on the group it's not unusual to not see a person in person for a few years.

One of the women, Natalie recently got into fitness working out with a PT twice a week. She was slim already. A few months ago she went to her school reunion and shared that she was nervous. She posted a photo of herself about to go out and we all told her she looked gorgeous - she did! Later she said some of the women were unfriendly and we all joked that they were jealous of her. She then made some nasty remarks about them being very fat and old looking now. It was a bit weird but the conversation moved on.

Some of the women in our group are struggling with their self esteem and upset about their weight. I don't know why as I only ever see them looking great but this is what they have shared.

Natalie, possibly spurred on by our compliments is constantly posting photos of herself. What started with outfits is now underwear shots every few days referring to her thighs, snatched waist or whatever.

I personally am delighted for anyone working on their fitness and feeling good about themselves (I'm in that camp) but the relentless photos and self congratulating are really peeing me off. It's not a group about fitness, nobody else is sharing progress photos and frankly it's bloody annoying.

It's gotten to the point I have muted the group and rarely post. I am holding myself back from making a caustic remark.

Yabu : she can do what she wants and is possibly inspiring the others
Yanbu : what a tedious bore - tell her to get a grip.

Aha yes, or 'me and dh really look forward to your underwear photos 🤤'

Don't do this. Own your own thoughts. She'd love the idea your man is liking her half naked pics.

Just for avoidance of doubt, my post was a joke. I think if you just block her separately the group chat will be ok minus her photos and comments.

Pretend that you've been hacked and that you the hacker have saved her photos!

Give it a couple of hours of her being worried and then go back on and say that your back in control.

🤣🤣🤣 I would love to see her response to that!

I hate when people treat WhatsApp groups like their Facebook feed. A woman at work does it with photos of her pet. She only gets one or two thumbs up now so I suspect I'm not the only one who feels that way. I don't understand why she can't see that she posts more than everyone else combined

This. She sounds ridiculous.

You're mistake was telling her the other women were jealous of her. She was clearly fishing for that, you gave it to her and now you're hoist with your own petard, because you can't possibly say anything without her thinking you're jealous too. Next time someone hints that you tell them how jealous everyone must be of them, do not say it!! Meanwhile I'd just heart the pictures. Takes two seconds. She'll hopefully get tired of it when the novelty of being thin wears off.

I'd just mute her or leave the group (and contact the others individually if I wanted to) but I'm anti social and in too many WhatsApp groups 😂
Either that or go for the fitness Instagram suggestion.
Some people are just bonkers aren't they.

Natalie its great you're so happy with your body and I understand that you want to show it off, but can you stop whataapping so many pictures of yourself please? My phone is filling up with pictures of you in scanties!

If it's getting on your tits it's likely the same for others too.
If it was I'd put up with it a little bit, and then probably end up saying something simple like 'you look fab, but enough of the underwear pics. They're wasted on us 😘

Harsh. Love it though 😂

Blimey Natalie I know your knicker collection better than I know my own.

I'm in Favour of sensitive, direct, personal feedback,

Message her individually with something like: Hi X, just wanted to send you a quiet request- I think it would be better to lay off the underwear/ body shots in our group chat. Some members may find it insensitive if they are struggling with their health or weight, and others I think find it irrelevant, with these kind of posts being more appropriate on social media, if you like that kind of thing. I really congratulate you for meeting your health goals, but I personally value the group chat for real conversations and arranging meet ups, rather than pic sharing of our bodies.

Or would that be crazy?

Would you combine this with the fitness insta recommendation?

She really will be making the other women feel like shit.

This ^

Or this …. Blimey Natalie I know your knicker collection better than I know my own.

Or ask for them in higher res so they print better, you know, for the posters

Blimey, OP. YANBU! This is a bit much. Does she post on social media? If not, maybe suggests she does this, say you will follow her but then mute her immediately or something.
Out of interest, is she quite young? Absolutely no offence meant by that question but I seem to see this more commonly among my friends in their 20s

Sounds like she really needs to read the room (group) 🤦🏻‍♀️. I’d do something like above. As you’re into fitness too, it’ll be better coming from you and she can’t shrug off as “more jealousy”.

Do a shit sandwich - lovely compliment followed by suggesting she leaves the pics off the group and reasons followed by another compliment or something nice.

I'd be tempted to post a pic of myself snacking each time she posts a pic. Just for balance like.

Make a joke about it? 'Where's Natalie's pants pic today?' or 'What are you (not) wearing today, Natalie?'

@Boreoffwithyournakedpics If you're into exercise, why don't you set up and suggest a fitness etc group then say in the main one "oh I've done a fitness group boasty and anyone who wants to join - means we can keep this group for gossip and we exercisers don't take over!" Then mute the group or just post weekly 🤣

I did this recently in a general WhatsApp group for the Archers addicts among us and it's worked a treat

Jeez, Natalie. This is WhatsApp, not OnlyFans. Put your arse away.

In your shoes I’d put a message on the WhatsApp stating you’re setting up a second group whatsapp group for fitness and fashion posts then do it

I would have said “Natalie, I think you’ve posted in the wrong group, this is the school mums one” 😬😂😂 at the very first picture.