DH, Anita Rani and the see thru dress

[DontShow]

Going to a ball soon, and I want to wear something lovely, also fashionable.

I was looking at more transparent dresses, as they seem to be in and I definitely have the figure for this. I am 46.

DH said it's all inappropriate. He's never really been fussy about me looking sexy before, he has always liked me to look classy, I call it Princess of Wales style.

So I said, what about Anita Rani, she is my age and looked amazing. "Let's see" he said, "I have always thought she is beautiful". So he looks at the photo for a while, says nothing about her, but says I should not wear something like that as it would be sad.

So, AIBU, or do you need a divorce like Anita to wear what you want at 46?
She has credited her divorce as the catalyst for wearing this, and I think she looks amazing frankly!

Women don't dress like that if there is no one to see them.

Why is it women have to expose lots of skin to look amazing but men can just wear a suit?

Dressing for the "male gaze" is not girl power.

You want to wear a see through dress to your child’s school??? What planet have I woke up on this morning, when would anyone think turning up to their kids school looking like a 10 pence hooker was a good idea or remotely glamorous? WTAF!

@FTPM1980 i’m not sure he’s telling her what to wear? I think he’s just expressing an opinion on a dress he’s been shown, isn’t he?

As for saying he likes her to dress in the style of the Princess of Wales, again he’s just expressing an opinion. Much like I would say to my husband I prefer him to dress in jeans and a nice jumper rather than the shorts and football shirts he usually wears. I’m not telling him what to wear, just saying what I like.

Later on in your post you also say to OP ’don’t wear that’ so why is it ok for you to say it but not her DH?

You want to wear a see through dress to your child’s school???

The ‘PJs on the school run’ mums may finally be finding a reprieve though 🤣

I think the PoW has the gold standard on partially transparent but classy! Still OTT for anything but a red carpet, though.

Anita’s is not a good look for all sorts of reasons - perfectly decent, I suppose, but not flattering and again not appropriate for anything but headline grabbing red carpet wear.

I don't think the dress flattered Anita Rani at all. Alex Scott also recently wore one and looked really uncomfortable in all the photos. I think it's one of those things that seems like a better idea than it is in practice. I wouldn't do it.

Im.all.for confidence, but there's better dresses out there. This just looks like pretty little thing dress yuk

I honestly don’t think that would look good on anyone. I dislike all over fleshy/beigey/browny coloured clothes because it just makes me think of a butchers shop window (not that there are many butchers shops these days). If that had been a strong colour it would have looked much better.
even so, unless you are doing genuine red carpet and expecting press photographers at your event, I would go for something a lot more mainstream. You can still show off your figure, it just doesn’t need to be practically naked.

It's just not a nice dress and doesn't even look good on someone as stunning as Anita Rani.

Just because something is a trend doesn't mean you should follow it. Especially when the trend is see through.

I think women dress like that as much, if not more, to impress other women tbh. As you say men don’t go to formal events in transparent shirts to show off their pecs or abs.

What sort of dress are you looking at?

Hahaha OP you’d be the talk of the entire school if you went to the ball looking so trashy! And your kids would die of shame! It’s not empowering, it’s attention seeking.

Tacky as fuck. It’s an expensive private school, it’ll be designer dresses wall to wall, you wear something see through and I think you’ll be laughed at. It’s inappropriate and yeah, you’re not a Kardashian.

Wow Kate looks amazing there!

Maybe you could go for the ones that
were worn at the Met Gala earlier this year

No do not wear that to a school ball, unless you are going to “get tongues wagging” in which case your DH is right, it’s a bit sad. Think Amanda from motherland “look at meee, I’m still young, I’ve still got it…”

There is a time and a place for statements about girl power- by all means wear something see through for cocktails, clubbing or a hen night but for a ball at a private school you should be going for timeless elegance which you can dance in without having to hitch your visible pants up every 5 minutes. Otherwise I can guarantee you’ll be sat in a corner feeling uncomfortable. Even Anita only chose this for a red carpet where she had to walk about 10 paces and have her photograph taken!

There is a difference between a ball and a red carpet ever t.

And even at red carpet events I still don't like the transparent/barely there dresses and outfits. The celebrities who wear proper dresses/outfits look much nicer, more classy, more,elegant imo.

I have been to balls in the past, normally either through work or school contacts. A transparent dress would not have been appropriate for any of those situations.

If you have the confidence to wear something like that then do.

I would look like a sausage and spend all night hiding behind plants but on someone else I would admire their courage.

What's your goal, OP?

What image and message would you like to portray about yourself?

That type of dress is a real class indicator!

Definitely go for OP. Two fingers to everyone, especially if your husband is dead against it.

Just imagine swanning into the ball in your see through dress with your husband silently fuming at your side as every head turns your way and you can almost hear people collectively thinking “what the Hell is she (not) wearing?!”.

Magnificent! What do they know anyway?

Definitely an opportunity to make everything about you and be the centre of attention and sod anyone else.

The only way to make it better would be to get obnoxiously drunk and have a very loud argument with your husband when he tries to get you to leave, shouting random insults to the people inevitably gawping at you making a spectacle of yourself.

It will be the stuff of legends. You’ll go down in the annals of history at this top private school. They will talk about you for years.

Marvellous 😂😂😂

Did your spellchecker change fuck to fuxk? Weird* *

also no idea, what the women's hour comment means.

However - your DH can shove it with having an opinion on how you 'should' look as it's entirely your business and not his

If my dh wanted to go to a ball in a transparent suit with his underwear showing I would definitely have an opinion on it! I wouldn't be happy about it and wouldn't want to attend with him.

Why is it different the other way round?

@Heronwatcher so true! This dress screams Amanda from Motherland!