First date - is this not a bit weird of him??

[Lilifer]

I joined an old fashioned dating agency a month ago and was sent a match last week. The way it works is that if you like the look of the profile of the guy you let the agency know, and they then contact the man to let him know to contact you, and they give him your number,

So far so good, man, let's call him John rang me on Tuesday to see if I would like to meet up. I suggested we meet up in a city that's half way between us both, (we both live rurally) initially I suggested coffee but he said he would like to go for lunch so I said that's fine, pick a restaurant and let me know which one and I'll see you there at 2pm Saturday.

I waited to hear back which restaurant he was choosing. Yesterday he messaged me to ask where I would be parking so that he could choose a place that's within walking distance of where I parked. (Which I thought was considerate of him.) I told him where I was parking and heard nothing back until just now when he messaged me to say that if it's ok, he'll contact me at 2-ish tomorrow to let me know where he is.

Aibu to find that bizarre and more than a little annoying? He's had 3 days to figure out a restaurant, it's not that hard to settle on a place. And we were meant to be meeting at 2 so what's with the "I'll message you at 2ish" about?? So I'm meant to drive an hour to get to the city , and park and then wait to be given my instructions ... 🤨 I'm a bit unimpressed to be honest.

He did say a couple days ago when we chatted on phone that as he lives rurally an hour from this city he's not too familiar with the restaurants but we all know how to google these days, it's not that hard.

I just think it's weird. I was already a bit nervous of this date as it's my first time getting out there since my divorce and now this has kind of thrown me and I don't know what to respond to him .. can anyone advise?

Suggesting a restaurant for a first date is a bit presumptive, and you might be setting a ££££ tone that he is not comfortable with. Restaurants are for third dates, birthdays and special occasions surely. You should have suggested coffee or meeting in a cafe. All this, book a table and tell me what time our reservation starts is a bit lady Jane, no?

I went on a date like this, the guy just wandered about and picked somewhere when I thought he would have arranged it, and it was quite embarrassing, plus he was dressed like he didn't have washing machine or iron which he probably didn't as he was divorced and clearly his wife had been doing all the washing! Hope it goes better than mine did, he might just be a bit uncertain but I think the message you sent is fine, I don't want to wander about with someone, it might be raining and then you have to find it yourself. You can't wait for a command at 2pm!

Maybe read my op which says I suggested coffee and he was the one who decided he would like us to go for lunch

@Dontgetdebtpet he suggested the restaurant, she suggested coffee, it's not her driving the lunch!

I agree the above text and tone is great. You could also google and choose a cafe and suggest it?

And it sounds like you may have to be clear about timing! If you are thinking 2pm and he's thinking 2 ish. Mmmm.

I would still give him a chance though!

Yeah I'm gonna go with that text and give it a chance though half of me is in agreement with a pp who said he is already messing about but it suits me to go into the city tomorow anyway as I've stuff I can do there so I'll just pick a place I think and nip it in the bud,

😮🙈😱

2'ish' is late to decide on a place for lunch anyway... then you have to get there, then order. I'd be starving by then 😂. Is he trying to string the thing out til the evening in the hope of....?

Be interested to hear how it goes OP and also intrigued about this old fashioned agency

I'll come back to the thread tomorrow and update you 😀

😂 he'll be hoping in vain

Make sure you get elevenses - I’d be starving by 2 and getting hangry which wouldn’t help the vibe! If you’ve got stuff to do anyway it’s less of a big deal. He might redeem himself

It's ok I never eat before 1pm or 2pm any given day anyway so no worries on that front. Just drink tea and coffee till lunchtime mostly.

Id be a wreck on just tea! Good luck and let us know how it goes 👍

2pm is a weird time to suggest for lunch, most restaurants lunch services finish at 2 or 2.30pm surely.

OP now is exactly the right time to set your stall out regarding your expectations. You (should) expect him to have good and booked a restaurant and let you know in good time by at least the day before (amd that's pushing it).

I'd text him and tell him that you're not really feeling it with the vagueness and suggest that he arranges something properly for another date (time).

Sounds very strange, he wants to know where you will be parked but won't be telling you where to meet until after you have parked up. I'd be concerned tbh and if you were a friend of mine I'd advise you not to go but would be following you if you insisted.
If he didn't know the area he could've just asked you to chose or said let's just meet at x and then have a walk round to see what's around.

That is a result! Enjoy.
And if he turns out to be your dream man you'll be compatible in terms of mealtimes too 😁

That sounds like a really lovely date tbf

That sounds lovely. Hope you have a good time.
You might want to get the details redacted from your post though, as it's a bit outing

Glad he’s pulled it back on course. Good luck OP!

Aw just saw update. Enjoy, hope it goes well.

Ooh true - how do I edit it or redact?

You can report your own post. Or try Night watch as it's late now. That's in Talk and you'd have to start a post to ask them.

This.