To be angry husband forgot car seat for the 10+ time

[Dodgeballllll]

I’m not really the kind of person to blow things out of proportion because life has dealt my family some tough blows and I feel like I have a balanced perspective generally on life and what to get stressed about.

HOWEVER I feel soooo angry because for what must be at least the 10th time since we had our 3.5 year old my husband has gone to work with one of the car seats in his car so when I came to leave this afternoon to go somewhere I couldn’t actually go because the car seat wasn’t in the car. It was transferred into his car last night because on a weds eve we meet at our son’s activity and he takes one car seat home with him with our other child in it. It sounds complicated but I’m so mad I can’t explain this properly!

AIBU to be enraged that he’s forgotten to transfer it back to my car this morning? I don’t understand how it’s possible to forget the same thing that many times!

If you needed it the next day you should have taken it out yourself the night before.

Hang on back up why are you wrong? You are doing the equivalent of 5 full time jobs if you do t work so why do you need to remember the car seat why can’t he be responsible for one thing ??

^^ This!

It’s easily done when you are in a rush for work. After the 3rd time I’d of bought a new one. You are not being unreasonable for being annoyed but you are for being only annoyed at him. It’s your responsibility too.

Definitely second car seat. We have 2 kids…4 car seats at a time!!

Well, you possibly are right but it's not worth the aggro.

Annoying yes but you are also capable of doing it yourself or reminding him the night before instead of him pissing about first thing before work taking it out

I’m with you OP. If you are the main user and the default is setting is seat in your car then if he takes the car seat out of your car he puts it back that night.
If he can’t be trusted then get another seat.

Nothing like the car seat brigade getting in on the judgemental action.

A HBB is suitable as an occasional seat. Especially as at 3 the kid will soon be outgrowing the weight of harnessed seat (if not already, my 14 year old was out of harnessed seat at 2.5)

This was a common issue with my husband when our DS was smaller. He works away during the week in his company car and didn’t like to drive my car at weekends, so would insist on moving the car seat in to his company car. I can’t count the number of livid phone calls I made at 9am on a Monday morning because he’d driven off down the M1 with the seat AND the buggy in his car and wasn’t coming home until Thursday night?!

It was resolved by getting a cheaper car seat for his car so the main seat (expensive Joie 360 thingy) never had to be removed from the main family car.

I also just started taking the buggy out as soon as we arrived home from wherever we had been instead of relying on him to remember. Not ideal, was just necessary.

You’re not unreasonable to be frustrated that he doesn’t think. It’s very tiring to be the one that has to remember all the time.

I think you are being unreasonable. Buy another car seat and stop faffing moving the seat around. I honestly can't believe that this has happened ten times and it hasn't dawned in you to get another one. It doesn't need to be an expensive seat, just get a reasonably priced, safe seat and put it in the car the child is in the least.

In 3.5 years you'd think you'd have had the time / money to just buy another car seat so you have 1 permanently in each vehicle.

YABU. Now stop whinging and get your ass down to Halfords ffs.

Stick a sticker on dash that just says car seat. Get in and look behind. Also start allocating him the jobs you couldn’t do because no car seat.

You could move the seat yourself or get another car seat 🤷🏼‍♀️
Ive learnt not to rely on my husband to remember to do stuff like this, although he doesn’t have adhd.

That’s ok, it’s perfectly safe and much safer than forward facing. Unfortunately when my kids were young they never had rear facing car seats for higher weights/ages, but my friend’s son stayed in one until he was 7 with his legs right up.

I agree.

In the days before iso-fix, or at least before it was universal, I used to wonder at all the parents faffing about with car seats at my son's nursery and leaving them in a store area they had rather than having one for each car. We had a cheap one and a (more) expensive one and kept the cheap one for the car that did the shorter journeys.

Get another car seat and have one in each car. Problem solved.

We have car seats for both kids in both our cars. The grandparents who do school pickups have car seats also.
Life is too short to constantly stress about switching seats 😅

Or you could’ve taken it out of his car last night? Or asked him to take it out of his car last night? 🤔

When we had two cars we had two cars seats (well four as we had two kids). I would be the same as your husband probably. I think if you move the car seat you need to move it back when you get home or only use your car if the child will be with you.

Why haven’t you got two cars seats if you have 2 kids? You’ve created the problem!

Nah, you're right! He should surely have noticed when he got in the car that the car seat was still in it! I would give him a mild gobful 😂

It tbh men are arses sometimes and thoughtless.

YABU it is easy to do, buy another one it will make life easier for everyone.

My husband was exactly like this with many things and it was infuriating . I divorced him in the end and became a lesbian …….