Colleague has said I'm vain a few times

[Spottttty]

Well not said it, but heavily implied it. I could understand if I'm going around saying 'Look at me I'm soo beautiful' but obviously this isn't the case.

She's said this because I sometimes put make up on or use a mirror at work at lunch. So what? Like it's not affecting her in any way.
She's made comments about 3 times, I've just laughed but next time I'll say something maybe?

It might just be friendly ribbing as she's nice otherwise but not sure what her goal is. She's someone who doesn't wear a scrap of make up and that's up to her, I'm not someone who can do that and that's just me.

That's a ridiculous and insulting leap.

OP you are not doing anything wrong. People here are nuts. Your colleague though is way out of order. If she mimics you, maybe just stop mid-action and give her the side-eye until she packs it in.
If she calls you vain tell her no, not vain, just a bit lacking confidence/insecure with your appearance. Look her straight in the eye, keep your voice factual, make her squirm. Then carry on as you were. It sounds like a bit of sly bullying to me. (For what it's worth I don't wear make up because I'm allergic)

Someone might die from poisonous toxins floating in the ether or, worse still, dropping in their food.

🫣

Perfectly put.

There are some really vile and snobbish comments on this thread.

Makes me realise feminism still has a long way to go, when there's still this level of bile over how a woman chooses to manage her personal appearance. It's depressing (and imo pathetic) that it's even still a thing in 2024.

It's not considered good manners to apply makeup in public. Maybe she's also kinda grossed out by you having concealer on your fingers and going back to eating id you're doing that. (Don't know how you apply it?)

I don’t understand the point. If you are concerned enough about your public appearance to use concealer, why do you want anyone and everyone to see this part of your routine, anyway?

If that's true she's not articulating it very well is she. 🤔
She's not exactly 'Beryl from accounts calls a spade a spade'... so much as
'Beryl from accounts counters inappropriate behaviour with rudeness of the indirect/irrelevant vocabulary variety, in the hope it is efficacious enough for you to unravel the code and modify your behaviour'.

Exactly. Sad to see that internalised misogyny is still rife amongst so many women.

It's not particularly nice.

You may not be vain but no-one needs to see you put your 'face' on in the canteen. People are eating their lunch for goodness sake

Why can't you get up and go to the loo to do it?

Not dictating.
Common courtesy

Why did you bother to ask in the first place?

Is this actually a thing? I've powdered my nose and retouched my lipstick at my desk plenty of times and now I'm paranoid everyone has been silently judging me 😂

Is this a British thing? A Mumsnet thing? Or have I missed the memo on a universal norm

I'm an occasional make up retoucher at my desk (along with 90% of the others in my office).

I do it openly because I don't want to cart my shit into the toilet and make someone feel uncomfortable if they are in there with a dodgy stomach, and i dont want my stuff getting wet from the sink area. And i dont care if it means I've revealed to everyone that I wear it, they have eyes, we can all see we all wear makeup and don't naturally look the way we do.

Its not taboo, it's not something I feel I need to keep secret, I'm not calamatiously throwing my powder everywhere into everyone's sandwich and if they don't want to see me doing that then they don't have to look at it.

If you already have make up on and you are touching it up midway through the day she probably finds that quite vain given that you are presumably just going back into the workplace where the same people have been looking at you all day anyway. She's rude to mention it though. She obviously thinks you are a bit self obsessed. Do it in the loo without an audience in future.

I also don't think she's jealous (WHY IS A WOMAN ALWAYS LABELLED AS JEALOUS FOR MANIFESTING IRRITATION FFS)

Misogyny?

Well I think it is vain to look in a mirror during the day but it's rude of her to say so.
One of my closest friends would do this. I also noticed she used to appraise herself in any mirror she passed, for example in a shop.
I look in a mirror once a day to brush my hair.

Are you a nun?

I have no idea why it is considered by many to be inappropriate. But I do know that it is considered by many to be inappropriate.

This is a good way to put it. It reminds me a bit of the “is it okay to go out in my pyjamas?” threads that crop ip
on here. I think there’s something in both (seeing someone apply make up/seeing them in their nightwear) that forces a level of intimacy on the observer that they may prefer not to have. That’s why it’s something that’s not done in public.

The virtue signalling on this thread is off the scale today isn't it?

You're vain if you look in a mirror more than once a day, LOL!

But what has she actually said?

Some of these comments! It must be exhausting to have to get up and go to the "powder room" everytime you want to reapply your chapstick or use your hand cream and I hope none of you EVER reapply your sunscreen in public, like on a beach or by the pool. That would be outrageous!

Are you worried about The Candyman?

Posh restaurant - lipstick/discreet teeth check/nose oowder only
Work - depends where you work really. I've done a full face of makeup at my desk before, and in my old job nobody would even bat an eyelid. I've seen someone with latex gloves on trying to get another colleagues lip piercing out, mascara wouldn't even be glanced at!

🤣🤣🤣