I’ve bumped my husbands new car 🚗

[StaceyAl]

I’m in a panic. My husband bought an expensive new car last week. He was having an afternoon nap so I just borrowed it to collect my son from sports training. I’ve reversed into a low wall in a car park (couldn’t see it in my rear view mirror) and have dented the rear bumper.
He’s working from home tomorrow- is there any chance I can get up early and take it to a garage to get fixed and return it without him knowing?
what should I do, I can’t tell him he’ll be furious and I took it without asking

Not stunned by that, that isn't news to everyone. But stunned that an adult feels so intimidated by the other adult in their relationship and thinks it's normal. And stunned that a reasonable adult would be so angry about an object that they would be scary.

I'm a bit concerned that I'm sharing the roads with all these people that think it's nothing to bump and scrape cars.

I had to have the car resprayed when I bumped it. Took 3 days and cost £1300

Is he violent to you, OP? It’s a bit worrying that you’re so scared of his reaction that you can’t say anything to him?

If you’re worried you’ll receive “ major consequences” for a dented bumper then you have a serious husband problem..
A man you’re scared of is not a good man.

I met my husband and I asked him if I can borrow his car to go to work. He said yes (we’d probably known each other 2 months at this point?). Someone drive into the back of me, his car rolled 5 times and landed on the roof. It took them 6 hours to cut me out and I was taken to hospital.

his car was a complete write off obviously and he was just happy I was alive with no broken bones.

Often it's abusive men that have charge of things if things are not shared

Your husband sounds abusive. It's concerning to hear about "consequences" you expect to receive.

You're a grown up in an adult relationship.

Unless you drove drunk with children in the car, I would barely bat an eyelid about some cosmetic damage to a heap of metal

My husband would probably be angry if I took his new car and damaged it. But ultimately he’d be happy me and the kids were ok.

And stunned that a reasonable adult would be so angry about an object that they would be scary.

I don't want to dig into OP here but what kind of reasoning is this?

If your partner cheats on you, you shouldn't be angry because it's just two consenting adults having sex?

Some yob steals your phone. Oh, it was just an object, you can buy another for £400. Be grateful you weren't hurt?

The car isn't just an object, it's a luxury item that was bought and probably intended to be looked after. Then taking without permission and returned damaged. Of course anyone has the right to be angry. The line of obviously drawn at abusive and threatening behaviour.

Quite how you managed to overlook/ignore the parking assist is beyond me - the impact sensor would've been screaming!
Hopefully a lesson learnt, that you need to be more careful when driving.

I don't see where we are disagreeing. You said the line was abusive and threatening behaviour. Being angry and taking that out on the OP as she was clearly afraid of is abusive and threatening.

I think that the OP is being very vague in an effort to get people on her side, it wouldn't surprise me one bit if she was indeed a bit of a muppet which is why she essentially stole her husband's car and scraped it because she had music blasting.

If I did this to my husband’s car he’d likely say “ah fuck’s sake, is it bad” and then we’d look at it and make a plan. He’d probably be mildly irritated but wouldn’t shout. You shouldn’t be scared of him

I’ve reversed into a low wall in a car park (couldn’t see it in my rear view mirror) and have dented the rear bumper.
**
New and expensive cars have parking sensors.

It doesn't make sense that you couldn't see the wall because the sensors would have beeped like mad!

That’s quite different to driving someone else’s brand new car into a wall of your own accord though, isn’t it?

It did have sensors, unfortunately I had music playing loud and didn’t realise they were beeping

I think the lesson learned is you don't play loud music when you're driving and especially reversing.

What if it had been a child behind the car and not a wall?

The music must have been bloody loud.

Being honest, you need to reflect on your driving and consider how playing music so loud that you can't hear other things is dangerous.

I don't understand this comment, when my sensors are in use the music volume quietens so I can hear the sensors - I thought this was standard

My husband took my car to work and while parking up he reversed it into something at work and damaged the back, arranged to take it to the body shop and text me a photo.
My first reaction was thank goodness nobody was hurt and second grateful he's taken
in and it was good as new.
Not a raised voice in the house, accidents happen and it was rectified.

Also, many new and expensive cars have parking assisted braking so the car will stop before you hit something. (That's what BMWs do.)

I always put the stereo off completely to park, I need every ounce of concentration!

I don't know if all cars have it, but my side view mirror moves down when I go into reverse - I think its worth @StaceyAl checking if her car has that option!

Mine doesn't as they are after market ones but on a new expensive car they should, I doubt they are after market.

Make sure the garage does a thorough check.
Bumpers do occasionally 'pop' back into position, or at least a semblance of normal, masking the bodywork damage within...

New and expensive cars have parking sensors.

And parking sensors start bleeping far too early so how many people leave it until the solid beep anyway.
If I relied on my parking sensors I'd be parked in a field on my own.

Hope you’re ok @StaceyAl