Why do people think parents who pay for private education are enormously wealthy?

[SheineOn]

Is this just the stereotype?

I went to a school that cost 18k a year (15 years ago). It’s now 24k a year.

There were wealthy people there. But also many ‘normal’ people. At least 40% fell into that category. People who lived on estates, drove modest cars, skipped holidays and ate cheaply.

They made a choice to spend their money on private education. For context, two of my closest friends have dc in private. They live off 450 a month after paying fees. They are not high earners.

Not everyone has endless wealth. Some are just happy to make the sacrifice. I find it strange people don’t seem to get that and makes me wonder how lacking in knowledge you must be to have that view of the private sector.

The shortsightedness over this issue is so mind numbingly tedious that I can’t believe intelligent women can really engage with it in any seriousness.

@Didimum

It's because despite their very expensive education and superiority complex, they're actually quite emotionally unintelligent and a bit dense.

You do realise the average median salary in the UK is £29k? So you are saying that post-tax, NI, housing, bills and food and all life's other expenses, someone on that would have £18k left over for a child's school fees? I'm assuming the friends you have who are supposedly living off £450/month are living in a house largely paid for by their parents, or else how would they have a roof over their head?

The notion that if only parents made the "sacrifice" they could afford private school is nauseating. What about those who quietly sacrifice time at home reading to their children and helping with homework, rather than those that turf out educational responsibilities to the private sector at a cost.

I say this as someone who went to private school myself 20 years ago - I don't want the same for my children but I can assure you I have made plenty of sacrifices on their behalf, including stalling my career progression so that I could spend more time at home mothering them. Ironically if I had persisted with that career I would have been on £150k now and we probably could have afforded private school fees, but I have no regrets with the path we have taken.

But they are wealthy! You are wealthy if you can save £1500 per month.

I assumed this also. But about 2 years ago I got a job in a school uniform shop and that stereotype is so so far from the actual truth it's unreal. Parents come in and buy the overpriced uniform for the private schools and I cringe when I charge them sometimes twice the amount for an item a state school parent would pay for it with a different school badge

But…why does it matter? Why does it matter if I think people who can pay for their child’s education have money? why do you care, what difference does it make?.

People who can pay £10+ k on their child’s education, be it one child or more have significantly more money than me, so yes I’d class that as having money/wealth. It’s subjective is it not? How much money makes someone wealthy? I’m a single parent in a council house with 2 kids & (2 adult kids) part time nurse with a complex child with asd who needs a place in a specialist school, I can not pay for that, I would if I could though.

It’s madness that there are people in the world with so little to worry about that they are getting worked up about maybe or maybe not being classed as wealthy.
meanwhile my child sits on his own in a school that doesn’t meet his needs and is failing him. But heyho must be nice.

What a load of rubbish. Sorry OP, although I’m not a Labour voter, they are guaranteed to get in and this policy will lessen the disappointment. Anyone who can afford to pay for a private education for their children is enormously privileged. Private education is a luxury. You either suck it up and pay, or admit you can’t afford it.

Have you even paid so much as a single nursery bill at this point? Completely talking out of your arse. Come back in 15 years when you've put your money where your mouth us (assuming you can pry the silver spoon out of it).

I went to state school and so did virtually everybody I know. I do generally associate private school with being rich and privileged, and so do a lot of people 🤷‍♀️

Is only a private school education a 'good education'?
And how much sacrifice? Because so much of the time on these threads when ps parents talk of working multiple jobs, living in a wee shack, walking instead of driving and living off turnips the key 'sacrifice' seems to be actual time with their children.

If you cannot afford school fees + VAT, you should work harder, make sacrifices like cancelling your Netflix and Pret subscriptions, and live within your means.

The fact you think so many people have the ability to save 1500 per month if they just cut back is where your confusion is coming from.

What if someone loses their job? What if you separate? What if they want to join a competitive sport that will costs thousands a year? Your PE savings won't remain untouched if you've only managed to save now by spending nothing on yourselves.

Because they are. The average household income in the UK is £35k. Most families don't have a spare £24k knocking about

Does anyone have stats for the % of pupils attending private schools on a bursary?

The simple answer to the question is "because they know how much more money they would need to be able to afford it".

if someone chooses a big house and fancy holidays over their child’s education then yes I think that is the wrong choice. But it’s not mine to make!

Its ok to not chose PE even if you can afford it…

It's reverse snobbery to belittle families who scrimp and save to send their kids to private school.

So the question is, why does the government feel is has to make that choice for people?

It thinks we are all small children and it needs to decide for us on a whole range of issues. Just like at Sunak's ridiculous smoking ban that would never be implementable in practice

And snobbery to think only private schools provide a good education, and mindless drivel to say that those who can afford them aren't wealthy compared to 90% of the population, and total ignorance to say everyone could afford them if they only made the right sacrifices.

And it is offensive to belittle everyone else by using the words "scrimp and save" to refer to a luxury item which costs upwards of £20k per year.

@Contemplation2024 but my OP is about the fact that paying fees doesn’t mean you’re wealthy.

we are not wealthy. It’s been a struggle to save 1,500 a month! A massive struggle

They may well not be wealthy after spending £24k per yr on fees. I'd rather spend the money on holidays, eating out, private tutors if needed, kids hobbies, a few luxuries.

@Pollipops1 of course. Choose whatever you like. It’s just my opinion and as you can see, plenty of people have opinions on those who do choose to pay fees.

Define "massive struggle" please.

yes that’s correct. But stop labelling parents who pay fees as wealthy. Many are not

But most are though which is the point.

You do understand that saving 1.5k after housing, childcare & bills every single month means a lot more disposable income than most?

Are you for real? Sorry to hear it's been such a massive struggle to save the equivalent of many people's monthly salary each month, it must be so hard for you.