Why do people think parents who pay for private education are enormously wealthy?

[SheineOn]

Is this just the stereotype?

I went to a school that cost 18k a year (15 years ago). It’s now 24k a year.

There were wealthy people there. But also many ‘normal’ people. At least 40% fell into that category. People who lived on estates, drove modest cars, skipped holidays and ate cheaply.

They made a choice to spend their money on private education. For context, two of my closest friends have dc in private. They live off 450 a month after paying fees. They are not high earners.

Not everyone has endless wealth. Some are just happy to make the sacrifice. I find it strange people don’t seem to get that and makes me wonder how lacking in knowledge you must be to have that view of the private sector.

@DanielGault they shouldn’t, they can do what they like with it and most people choose holidays and houses and cars over education. But you don’t get people immediately identifying someone driving a fancy car as ‘wealthy.’ Whereas someone who spends money on schools fees is automatically deemed wealthy and it’s simply incorrect

I have not read all the comments. I am aware that not all people who send their child to a private school are wealthy, however, most are high earners. Private education is primarily geared towards people who have a certain lifestyle. People who make sacrifices you are describing are not the target audience.

I do think it's a bit different when we're talking about a child with SEN. I was very lucky to get my dd into a state special school for secondary after she had a horrendous time in mainstream primary.

I'm pleased you said this. With an annual income of less than 30k and paying ludicrous rental prices, I was more than annoyed at your opening post insinuating that if I cared more about my children I could somehow send them to private school.

I barely spend a penny on myself, the little spare money goes on after school clubs. So spending approximately 20k a year per child IS for people I would consider wealthy. Two working parent families with one child and low housing costs I can see how it may be more achievable if you don't spend thousands a year on holidays.

I am more than happy with children's state schools, and if I did have extra thousands pa I would choose to spend it on experiences. I'm not sure why people think others feel hatred towards them just because their child goes to a private school. One of close friends went to private school and another has both her children at one. Not once have I thought it was any of my business or thought anything negative about it.

I know people who have done this too or sent the eldest and not really thought it through but not withdrawn them, kept them in and the younger ones just go without

So we are ‘bad’ parents for not making the sacrifices?

Thats what you’re saying.

I would never spend on private school, I have 6 cousins all went to private school not one GCSE between them. 2 cousins went to grammar school and left at 16 with good grade and now work in pubs or admin jobs.

Out of 4 siblings only one 1 doesn’t have a degree, but has a high paying job.

Out of (of age) 5 DN/DN are going to Uni or are nearly finished the others are too little for school yet.

Sum up - those who went private didn’t get very far, those who went state have degrees.

Doesn’t add up does it? They could’ve brought houses with the cost of their education and set them up for rent free living.

This.

@Scarletttulips no, I’m not saying that. Do you feel bad for it? Because I haven’t said you should.

im saying people need to stop labelling parents who pay for school fees as wealthy.

Most people ? most generally means the majority so you are trying to explain away why you use private education because you think you are part of the majority but making better choices!

Because at £24.000 that's nearly all my husbands wage silly sod picked working in 3rd sector .Changes kids life, really well respected and loves his job but boy is it underpaid. Also interesting during covid how many low paid workers were essential to this country's running and well being .So private school is way beyond us

I find it strange people don’t seem to get that and makes me wonder how lacking in knowledge you must be to have that view of the private sector.

Indeed OP - I find it strange that you are so lacking in imagination and intelligence despite having gone to a private school.

It can't have been that great!

As an example of a middle class family. We have 3 kids. 3 x £24k is £72k. When they were in secondary school I was on £32k (before tax) and my DH on £50k (also before tax) - you see where I'm going with this??

£82k - £72k = £10k per year to live on for 5 people. The £82k figure isn't even correct - it would be a lot less than that. Oh, and we were still paying a mortgage then too.

It would seem you either like to start a bun fight - or you're seriously lacking basic maths skills.

I 'choose' a house because a homeless kid in any school might stand out somewhat. You seem awfully judgemental about what other people spend their money on yourself. You actually seem quite fixated on 'stuff'. And yes, if you're spending that money on fees, you are very wealthy. You need to reconnect yourself with the real world. It's up to yourself whatever you choose to do, but it reeks of 'my wallet's too small for my 50s, and my diamond shoes are too tight '.

@Mrsjayy if someone chooses a big house and fancy holidays over their child’s education then yes I think that is the wrong choice. But it’s not mine to make!

Except that the whole premise of your thread is that private school parents are morally superior because they prioritise their children's education.

@DanielGault im fixated on stuff because I’d rather go without stuff than not pay school fees. Ok, makes sense 👍🏼

They are though. £24k of discretionary money is lots whatever you choose to spend it on.

Do you go without to pay school fees? Or is this all hypothetical snobbery?

OP most people don’t have 24K sitting there per child to spend on other things either

@leafybrew PE isn’t just about academics. Hence why people choose it. Otherwise you’d just get an evening tutor?

What 'stuff' are you suggesting that families on minimum wage should go without to pay school fees? Food?

Which raises the question of Labour aren't targeting other exemptions from VAT like books and children's clothes.

Rather than facilitate the industrious to lift themselves up via thrift and sacrifice, Labour resorts to pulling everyone down.

Marx and Lenin (and Stalin) are still Keir Starmer's heroes even if we days otherwise. Watch the actions , not the words.

Most people don't have that choice though because most people don't make that kind of money.

@Kinshipug our dc is 10 months. We’ve saved 1,500 a month for several years for PE when she’s 5

Wealth is relative, however if you are paying 24k pa on school fees you are wealthy, you may not be as wealthy as others, but you are a lot wealthier than the family living on 24k a year.

That's not what "most" people do at all. Most people couldn't afford a private education, even if they didn't spend any money at all on holidays and cars. We spend about £2k a year on holidays. Our car is 14 years old, we haven't spent anything on it in 12 years. Even if he didn't spend £2k a year on holidays, we still couldn't afford private school.