To sleep with a 23 year old?

[Possomoppossum]

Given that I am 42,he knows full well how old I am,we met on a dating site where he wanted to meet older women.ok or creepy age gap?

This^

No, they would be talking about power imbalances and control.

Happy to be corrected but I’m not sure 20 something women put fake ages on their OLD profiles and trawl the apps looking for sec with older men to ticket DILF box

I'm 39 and my entire life I have NEVER been able to tolerate even the IDEA of shagging a younger man. When I was 15, 13yr olds were gross. At 20, 18yr olds were babies to me. At 30 even the prosect of hooking up with someone 29.5 was unthinkable to me!! BUT - that's just my weird preference. Honestly I would've shagged a 60yr old man at 21 if I thought they were impressive. Inspiring. Charming. Haha. It's always been a red line for me to go younger. I've no idea why. Perhaps a fear of mothering a partner. ALL THAT SAID... One of my favourite movies of ALL TIME is Harold and Maude. A beautiful, wonderful story. Watch a trailer. Watch the film. It doesn't change my personal preference but I absolutely respect the idea of a age gap between the older woman / younger man, if it works for them!! I can't recommend that film enough. I believe there can be a connection of free spirits (of course, between adults). Sometimes magical connection's are made. If only for fun. But yeh. Not for me personally. Maybe if I was 80, that would change. Who knows!! Dont worry about others perceptions. If it doesnt feel weird, and if your expectations are aligned, I say go for it Xxx

I think some people need to move beyond ‘yuck’ as their best argument against this relationship!

it doesnt matter what everyone else thinks, its none of anyone elses business. if you want to date a 23 year old then do it? you may need to consider other people judging you, if this kind of thing doesnt bother you, then happy days, but if you are the kind of person who worries what others think, you need to bear in mind this will probably affect the relationship.

at 23 hes likely to have a different outlook on life to you, lots of things may be firsts for him, whereas you may have lived a fuller life. theres also the whole marriage and kids thing, is it something you still want, so if this did turn into something serious and he wanted children.. do you?

if it doesn't bother you, then date him, shag him, do whatever with him, but just be mindful it will probably come with complications.

Grim

Sex with my toyboy was so disappointing that I developed an ick straight after.

As the mother of a 25 year old I find it creepy.

I think it's creepier to have any opinion about the sex life of your 25 year old son, to be honest.

Two consenting adults can shag if they want to.

Clearly another one with no morals 🤷. Consenting adults or not, most 23 year old “men” are still boys . Why would a mature woman be interested in a boy? Either afraid of getting old no doubt.

Fuck morals. How old are you? In your 80s or more?

Consenting adults or not, most 23 year old “men” are still boys

No they're not, or shouldn't be if they haven't been completely infantalised.

Morals is another word for misogynist control of women.

Not from me, it wouldn't.

Unlike many, I think that adult women have agency and can be trusted to make decisions on their own behalf.

Well said, at 23 you are an adult.

Consenting adults or not, most 23 year old “men” are still boys

Of course they’re not! They can fight in wars, get married, own property and every other adult thing… but sleeping with a scary 40 year old woman is too ‘adult’ for the poor little lambs?! 🙄

I have a FWB who is 26, I'm 46. We've been seeing each other for over 2 years (23 & 44 when we met at a party). It works great for both of us, it's not going to lead to anything long-term which is perfect for both of us, but we're good friends and it's a fun relationship. As long as you both establish what you're looking for, you could have a great time

Age is NOT an issue, not at all but one needs to be aware of other possible issues (as with any new acquaintance or a stranger) issues of psychiatric background, criminal background, honey-trap, etc. etc. Enjoy. Maybe, I spend too much time watching TV documentaries!!

That's what I want@lilkitten,just a fun time with no expectations either side.Tbh when I chat to him about his day and what he's got going on,he seems more than mature enough to cope with some fun in the bedroom,I don't expect him to do anything more than let me have my wicked way with him,which he is more than happy with.

Don't worry what other people think. If you and he feel comfortable then that's fine. There are loads of couples with that age gap the other way round. And then there's the Macrons

Go for it but only for a fling. You're both in your sexual prime. You'll most likely have a ball in the bedroom.

YANBU Go have fun. Be safe and don’t take it too seriously. If we see a future post saying AIBU to marry a 23 year old off a dating site, I may not be as encouraging!

Go Girl. Just let us know how it was could you keep up 😀😀😀😀

I know a few men who actually just like older women. Our fetishism is usually fixed by age 7. Are you seriously condemning all men who might prefer older women to being weird abnormal or just needing practise?Reactions on this site often surprise me. It might not be your thing but a long as it's with consent and not coercive go for it.