Husbands buying flowers?!

[babymama3938475749022971111]

I want to know how often your husbands get your flowers?
me and my husband have had the conversation that he should make more effort with romantic gestures. Even buying cheap reduced flowers every now and again to me it’s the thought that counts.
Before anyone states do I buy him gifts, YES all the time when I go out I always get him something I know he likes, a chocolate bar or his favourite thing. But I never get it in return which I find quite upsetting and he knows this. So AIBU to want flowers or a chocolate every now and again?

Not super often. But I don't really care becuase he does other romantic things. It's about feeling valued and desired, I feel that way constantly so I don't really need the flowers. If he doesn't make you feel that way then there's more to it than flowers.

only on Mother’s Day, Valentine’s Day and my birthday. So predictable .

Every time the ones in my vase die, he replaces them. So every 2 weeks or so?

Rarely. In fact, apart from a special occasion, probably never.
It wouldn’t feel romantic if I had to ask him to buy me flowers, I like flowers so I just buy them for myself when I go past a florist and see a bunch I particularly like.

I hate being bought flowers and my husband and DC know this.

I do love chocolate though, so he often surprises me with random bars of that, or little bags of sweets.

@Nottherealslimshady I wouldn’t say I don’t feel desired He loves me dearly I know that and can tell that but I find the effort side in our relationship sometimes is lacking from him.

A couple of times a month usually

Every two or three weeks.

DH regularly buys me chocolate from the shop; it’s his love lanaguage

He would never buy me flowers except on Valentine's Day, anniversary etc. Tbf I wouldn't usually buy him little "no reason" gifts either.

We've been together 27 years and I still love him to bits btw.

Only specific occasions these days, he always gets them for anniversary, birthday, Mother's Day and somewhat randomly Christmas, but it's been a long time since he randomly bought me some. Oh actually last year after a big holiday to thank me for my planning which was quite sweet, he's more of a practical person tbh, not overly romantic or spontaneous, so long as he keeps doing the laundry though that's fine by me!

He’ll get a bunch from the supermarket if I ask him. He buys me Raffaello ice lollies and oatcakes too. He’s a good lad.

Mine used to get them regularly at the start of the relationship mainly when he had upset me ! He very rarely does now but often comes in with a little treat for me

This sounds a bit like a formulaic template of what the movies say that romance is supposed to look like. DH has never bought me flowers - and I’ve never thought that an issue, if I want flowers I buy them for myself. He’s a blue-collar boy from Detroit, he’ll sooner make me a full set of garden planters from clapboard he hauled a mile in a handcart, knowing I wanted some. But in terms of other forms of showing appreciation - such as planning surprise trips or events for each other, finding random gifts just because, dates or outings planned to weird places we know the other would like, quality time just bimbling somewhere, encouraging words for each other etc - DH and I do all of those things for each other most days / weeks, fairly unconsciously I suppose. I wouldn’t call it romance, just being in a healthy relationship where you enjoy making each other happy.

What attracted you to each other in the first place? If you asked him how he thinks he shows you how he appreciates you, what would he say? If you asked him whether he acknowledges your appreciation of him, would he agree?

If he bought me random flowers I’d wonder what he’d been up to 😂

Bog gestures feel quite contrived to me. I love it when he comes back from the garage with a bag of my favourite sweets just because I like them or something like that. Those little ‘thinking of you’ moments.

Only daffodils. I told him way back when if he ever come home with a bouquet of flowers I’d want to know what his done wrong.

He clearly listened 😂😂 he does bring random wine and chocolate though.

Plants more than flowers, and generally when there's an event, or when theyre reduced and he knows I like the challenge of saving a plant at deaths door!

My husband has never bought me flowers, I don't enjoy them and he knows that. He buys me Lego, chocolate and books instead.
Do you spend quality time together, does he appreciate it when you cook etc, surely that's worth more than a cheap bunch of supermarket flowers.

Oh yes I get succulents and cactuses.

Once in 14 years we we're together. Late DCat ate the heads of every one of them and puked multi coloured piles of petal puke all over the living room carpet 🤦🏼‍♀️

He doesn’t really do flowers as a surprise treat but he often says “Let’s get some flowers” when it’s his turn to pay for the weekly supermarket shop. Mainly because flowers cheer him up as much as me. Who says romance is dead, eh? 😃

He is incredibly thoughtful and kind in most ways though, and I wouldn’t really say that gifts are my love language anyway. We don’t tend to surprise each other with random small gifts but we do go out for nice meals etc and he’s good at organising nice stuff for us to do, which I greatly appreciate.

DH regularly buys me chocolate from the shop; it’s his love lanaguage

My husband's love language is sending me cat videos from YouTube he thinks I'd like 😂

Once.

Buying gifts is not really our love language.

What's his love language?

And is yours just gifts? He needs to understand that.

Whenever he sees the ones in my vase starting to droop, he puts a reminder on his phone to get more in a few days. It's very sweet.

The thing about romantic gestures is, are they romantic if you have to ask for them? Isn't the point of them that the person giving the gift was thinking of you at a random point in the day and wanted to show you that?

Idk, maybe he's not much of a gift giver, some people really aren't. Does he show his love and appreciation for you in other ways, or are you just feeling a bit undervalued and unappreciated in general in the relationship and this is how it's manifesting? As a want for flowers?

he Could literally bring me a kit Kat home and I would be over the moon 😂
ive been to the shop today and got him a choccy bar he likes because I saw it and thought of him 😑😑😑