To choose to work school friendly hours?

[Niliu]

I will soon need to make a big decision about role at work- either way will be a senior position.
I can choose to do school hours (9.30am-3pm) 4 days a week at £60k, or work FT for £100k.

In the latter role I'm also more likely to be able to expand the role and have £10k rises quickly, whilst in the former school hours role my pay won't see any major leaps and I would have to take on more hours to get any more money- there's also a chance I could get 'stuck' in this role.

I feel annoyed at myself contributing to the female 'pay gap' by taking the lower paying role and I love the idea of being able to afford a a bigger house and better holidays. However my kids are still only little (5&3) and I feel they will benefit from my time.

If it's relevant husband works 30 hours week hybrid job at £35k. He is an equal parent.
Actual content of role is fairly similar so no differentiating factors there either.

Help me decide!

If you can genuinely finish at 5 and be home at 5:30 I’d go full time for definite.

many ft jobs mean working to 6/6:30 and home around 7:30 - I wouldn’t want that if I had a choice.

but 5:30 home means a family meal together every day! I wouldn’t worry about missing 3pm-5:30 if your dh can do that and a bit of after school club.

Ha only on mumsnet is 90k "not great"!!
You're already in the top few percent of household income.

As someone who is currently dumping 40% of salary into my pension to play 'catch up' I would surely consider the higher paying role now and consider pension and long term financial security. I didn't work PT but a single parent who needed the cash there and then.

Also I've always observed senior PT people working FT hours on PT pay but recognise your company may be different.

I know, bonkers isn't it.

I can't tell you how much difference it has made to our lives having a bigger house, with a playroom. You don't appreciate how much the low level stress of not having enough space gets to you until it's lifted.

You can get all the storage you want and cull toys etc but if you can afford a bigger house by having one person working full time then I'd do it, no question.

just feels like perhaps you're factoring in society's expectations that it should be you at home available for the kids - despite your huge earnings potential.

Agreed. With a decent partner, mums can keep these well-paid fulltime jobs.

Yes you'll lose free nursery hours won't you, but appreciate that's a short term hit.

I also want to know what job pays 100k on a 9-5

It's not sniping, if someone is asking for experiences of working full time Vs school hours with kids, some one who doesn't have kids yet chiming in that they have a great set up and their small house is fine just isn't relevant. Anyone can post on a thread but it's fine for the OP to point out it's not too helpful!

I’d take the full time job. Working one extra day will nearly double your salary. I do a school hours job but am going back to full time shortly. The after school time is really not as golden as some people make out. Kids are tired, you have so much to sort out (dinner, homework, taking them to clubs etc) that “quality time” is actually pretty limited. And you have the amazing option that your husband can do it, while you make much more money for the family.

The advantage of a higher salary isn’t just a nicer house and holidays - it’s also that you can pay for help with the boring stuff which in a way buys you quality time. When I did full time hours (and when I will again very soon) I used some of the extra money to pay for a cleaner twice a week, who also did our laundry. I had all the ironing sent out and basically had almost all domestic work done by others - gardening, DIY etc. It meant that the time with the kids is exactly that - just time with them. Playing board games after dinner, weekends without having to do washing or cleaning means more time together as a family doing trips or just hanging out.

I have found that school hours only is actually the worst of both worlds - the stress of work with the drudgery of housework.

The after school time is really not as golden as some people make out. Kids are tired, you have so much to sort out (dinner, homework, taking them to clubs etc) that “quality time” is actually pretty limited.

I can't emphasise this enough.

I feel like the after school couple of hours is really romanticised on here.

I would agree with this.

But my children actively hate after school club. In fact one of my children is a school refuser. You don't know what life might throw at you.

Ha only on mumsnet is 90k "not great"!! You're already in the top few percent of household income.

Contextually, if OP is capable of earning £100,000 (and possibly still in the first half of her career) a £90k household income is not great, more so given they are not yet in their likely final home.

Sure.

Mine love after school club but on the OP's potential future salary, she could afford an after school nanny if she ended up with a child who didn't. Or for her DH to give up work entirely

There's no reason for her to go for a school hours role now.

In fact one of my children is a school refuser. You don't know what life might throw at you.

Well they can cross that bridge if they ever got to it, the financial stability a £100k+ income could bring in the meantime can make those life curveballs much easier to handle though.

I think it depends if the full time job is genuinely 9-5 and not insane stress levels or whatever. If so, then I’d take that as long as DH was committed to picking up the family slack!

I work part time, mostly school hours (nowhere near your salary) although I’m lucky in that I’m flexible, there is no school wraparound, and having to stop everything at 2.45 daily is quite annoying work wise.

Also 8-9am and 3-6pm isn't really particularly enjoyable or quality time in our household to be honest. A few days a week I’m taking to various clubs then and I’m usually cooking dinner, doing washing and cleaning, and they often just want to flop and watch tv, especially by the end of the week and term.

This arrangement works for our family because someone has to be home for the kids and we’ve chosen it to be me at this moment in time. I’m sure my DH feels no guilt. I’d hate for us both to be out 8-6 with kids in full time childcare and a household to run. I know millions do though.

For 40k plus progression and with DH already potentially home a lot for the kids and on a much lower salary, I’d definitely go full time

I would pick school hours. Your kids are still very young. By the Time your kids leave primary school your DH may get promoted or you may bag another opportunity.

I miss my DC being 3! Enjoy it OP.

I'd go for the more enjoyable life where I have more contact with my kids, so school hours no question..

The OP doesn’t need after school club as she said her husband can pick up. Surely school holidays are the same problem in both jobs, unless I’ve missed where the OP gets all the holidays off too? If I’ve missed it and it’s £60k for school hours plus holidays that sounds amazing and I take it all back and would recommend going for that!

I don’t think there is any amazing quality time after school that warrants both parents to be there, I think it is unusual to have both parents there every day after school.

In terms of pension, more fun money, more progression, I think the full time job is a no-brainer really.

Is there any flexibility? I work full time and can be pretty flexible as I have a project based job so it doesn’t rely on me being at my desk for 0900-1700. I didn’t want to reduce hours and go pro-rata as I knew I’d be doing the same role for less pay.

I would choose FT role if DH fully on board that he would be primary carer essentially in week.

Full time all the way!
You have a supportive DH who can take on child admin in the week, and imagine how useful that extra money will be. Even if you don't need it, save it either for yourselves or for them for later.

School hours without a doubt.

FT definitely. Be present and available at the weekend. Sounds like you'll also be home to tuck them in every night, read them a story, hear about their day. Your DH is on board so go for it.

I’d take the bigger job. It sounds like your husband has already taken the back seat (hours and money), so it seems sensible if he picks up the slack with childcare.

I would go for the FT job and higher salary with more promotion opportunities. A lot does depend on the job and the expectations that go with it though. Is it genuinly 9-5, with possibly a bit of overtime each week, or is it written in a contract as 9-5 but the expectation is that you're available pretty much 24/7 and no one is allowed to leave the office before 9pm?

you work just as hard and you end up paying a full day of childcare unless you can be there at 3pm on the dot to pick the kids up from school.

This is a really good point. At my child’s primary, after school club is £6, whether you pick up at 3.15pm or 6pm. It’s a flat fee.

Working 9-3 would make no difference; you get to school at 3.15 or 3.30. You’d still be paying the same amount for wraparound care as working full time, plus earning a grand a month less to boot.