To think Brits dislike success?

[garlicmashpotatoes]

After many years of reading comments from posters on MumsNet and other forums, I get the impression that many Brits cannot stand to see people who have 'more than them' or achieve 'success' when they've worked hard to do so.

In America success is celebrated, and aspired to. Whereas in the UK it's often looked down upon.

Why?

Oh okay then Lady Mumsnet.
can you see me doffing my cap and tugging my forelock? Hope so

Searching for a fuck to give... Searching... Searching... Nope, all out.

Oh the irony, I never brought up having a disabled child originally as I didn’t feel it needed pointing out that some people are born in a better situation to ‘do life’ than others…..yet I get told I should be more transparent by one poster and another one (you) says it’s irrelevant.

Clearly some people can’t see beyond their own privileges to be able to grasp this notion. Do you have NT children?

How do people know you're successful?

If a state school child has all of the above they should do well too. The private school with its smaller class sizes etc still gives it pupils an advantage- if it doesn’t,
why do people pay?? What are they paying for?

Huh? I think because people don’t like
arrogance. And what counts as ‘success’?

No.

It’s nuanced.
I respect those who work hard and do meaningful jobs - healthcare, own a factory that employs locals, farming etc.
On the other hand, I rarely respect finance types who move money around and produce little of value, and get paid a fortune in bonuses for it. My (ex) partner was one of them and admitted they were vastly overpaid for doing very little that was worthwhile.

I was going to say - there are also clever kids who do basically no work and still do well at exams.

Ditto kids who work incredibly hard and do average. An element of it is definitely luck

It’s because they didn’t like the poster acknowledging their upbringing and how lucky they were @Floatingvoternolandinsight doesn’t like anyone saying that luck plays a
role, they won’t have that!

The point is not everyone can be doctors. It doesn’t matter how hard someone tries, they won’t make the grade! That can be said for the majority of people.

Yes that all the poster was doing isn't it. You can't make this shit up. Well you can, clearly.

Right, so you don’t have NT children, ok…..

I can only assume you don’t have children then? Because surely as the mother of a ND child you wouldn’t have such an acid tongue with your response!

If we had to score points for shitty childhoods and upbringing, I’m pretty sure I’d score higher than most folk. I know more about bad luck and shit times than most!

That is true. It would not matter how hard I worked, I could never be a professional ballet dancer. I do not have the build.

It's odd that so many people have disdain for the successful yet are quick to marry them!

I never married him. We never even loved together.

*lived

I wasn't referring to you specifically. Your post just made me think.

Yes I agree. It’s a negative and significant part of British culture. Many Brits would rather nobody has anything lest one person they don’t like gets it.

Brexit was also successful because the Leave leaders knew appealing to the ‘cut off your own nose to spite your face nature of many Brits would be a winning strategy.

Even though VAT on private schools will probably end up in a bunch of rebates and cost more than it brings in, many love it as it’s about potentially taking away something from other people.

Envy is a sickness in our society and all it’s done is make the country poorer and more bitter.

And that’s why ‘British’ people don’t like it - we prefer fair play, level playing fields, quiet integrity and favouring the underdog. Leaving crass bragging and whooping to other cultures thanks.

If that’s what we prefer then how do you explain the fact that British people repeatedly vote for Conservative governments, who stand for precisely none of those things?

In some ways I think what’s weird about our country is that people don’t resent certain kinds of success more. There is such vast inequality, yet people seem totally comfortable with those born wealthy, like David Cameron and Boris Johnson, having cushy billets for life. There’s weirdly little resentment of the upper classes.

I feel like someone starts a thread on this topic this every few days. I’m actually hoping it’s some sort of dystopian division-stoking bot and there aren’t multiple actual people deciding to put this out there and then run away and watch us all fight like rats in a bag about who’s deserving and who’s not.

It’s not so much a dislike of success, it’s the very black and white idea that hard work pays off and if anyone struggles it’s their own fault. There is no nuance and it’s as if people have no idea or empathy. You only have to read the threads on here to see the staggering ignorance around MH issues, benefits, low wages etc. it’s not success people have an issue with, if someone works hard and is successful, great for them! It’s more the inequality and ignorant attitudes that people take issue with.

I am an American who lives in the UK, and I just retired.

Maybe some people in the UK see success as a zero-sum game. If you win, I lose. In the States, if you win in a company, I win too because the company or institution does better for itself. And it seems very much bound with class in the UK…and not appearing to try very hard or inherited privilege is more rewarded than evidence of hard graft.

I learned quickly never to say anything about what I achieved, talk about holidays, my family, or much of anything in my life with work colleagues so nothing would be used against me or be bullied. Just banal pleasantries. I am also v. careful not to mention any success, etc to most casual friends here…reserve that for very close friends I can trust and family. Never could understand why people just can’t be happy for each other in the UK. Life is hard enough, no?

There’s weirdly little resentment of the upper classes.

Because they're out of reach, a bit like celebs. A different world.

People envy those around them. The neighbours who are doing well. The parents turning up after school in the new Range Rover etc.