AIBU to think that bathing your kids once a week is not 'neglect'.

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This is spurred on by another threat about someone struggling to keep their house clean. They mentioned that their kids are bathed once a week. This caused a lot of negativity amongst posters, with some comments calling bathing your kids once a week 'neglect'. This surprised me!!

My DC is 4 and has on average 2 baths a week (and yes, sometimes that means 1 a week). It has never been part of our bedtime routine - it gets them het up rather than calming them down. Their hair is washed once a week in term time after swimming class (v long hair as per DC's request, which takes an age to wash and dry). On holidays we once went 3 weeks without washing their hair. Hair was not smelly and looked lovely throughout.
My DC is not smelly, not dirty and most definitely not neglected! They have clean clothes, tidy brushed hair, are very popular at school, and have a generally nice life. (They also have a miraculous ability to somehow stay clean even when eating bowls of bolognaise and poking around in the dirt at school, which is helpful 🙏. Obviously if/when they do actually get covered in mud I wash them!).

I did some poking around and the American Academy of Dermatology say that children below pre-teens do not need more than 1-2 baths a week as long as they're not actively dirty/smelly.
https://www.aad.org/public/everyday-care/skin-care-basics/care/child-bathing

So is it really that bad not to bathe your children very often?

YABU - Children are dirty and sticky, more washing please!

YANBU - As long as they're not stinking up the bus then it's fine.

Not neglect if the children are being washed in other ways more regularly - sink wash, shower, hand washes etc.

If a child is literally only being washed once a week in a home where there is access to a bathroom and water, I’d find that quite neglectful, yes.

It’s not neglect, but I think a minimum of twice a week is needed to be acceptably clean. Little ones don’t wipe their bums properly, smear food everywhere, go in the dirt, get felt tip on their hands, wipe their noses with the backs of their hands etc

Twice a week with rigorous hand, face and bum washing in between is acceptable.

We all shower every other day here.

Dc have gone 4 or 5 days between showers when we've been camping etc and somewhere with no facilities. No one died! They just enjoyed their shower when we got home!

I don't know why people are talking about what was normal fifty years ago.

We now (for the most part) have access to unlimited hot, running water in our homes. There's not really any reason not to wash on a daily basis (medical reasons aside).

It's not neglect as long as you are keeping them clean, looking clean and not smelly. Washing skin, changing into clean looking and none smelly clothes, ensuring hair looks and smells clean.Edited to say, and brushing teeth twice a day.

Yeah, I read that post and was shocked by the neglect commens. I bathe my children once a week (4 & 8). Children don't sweat the same as adults. My kids wash their hands and face, brush their teeth, clothes are clean and hair is brushed. They don't go to school looking or smelling dirty. I don't understand people's need to bathe all the time. A bit of dirt is ok! In fact it would be so much better for the environment if we didn't waste so much water as well as bath products. I understand teenagers need to shower more but not younger kids unless they have spaghetti or something in their hair. 😂

People who claim perfectly normal things are very neglectful have clearly lived a sheltered and privileged life. If they’ve ever had a job or upbringing where they were exposed to ACTUAL neglect - where bathing your kid once a week is actually a huge step forward - I’m certain they’d not trot out such utter bollocks

We only had one bath a week when we were little - I think that was the done thing. We did however have a proper wash down at the sink (top and tail). A 4 year old would need to be wiped down I imagine - when they are having their face washed.

^^This.
It was alongside not changing bedding for a month or two and the same for cleaning the bathroom.

that might well be.
but on the days without bath people would do a pits&bits wash with a flannel which doesn't seem like the done thing these days.

3 weeks not washing the hair of a 4 yo is neglectful.

1 Bath/shower a week may not amount to neglect by itself, but it is something that neglectful parents do.

Showing their ignorance, it’s better for the microbiome to keep baths to a minimum. I bath mine 1–2 times per week. No wonder eczema is such a problem these days and so many children have poor immune systems. I believe it impairs vitamin d absorption also. I only use soap and shampoo on mine after swimming because of the chlorine, otherwise it’s water only.

The more you bathe your kids the more shit product you buy. Most people are brainwashed. Once a week is fine

It’s not neglect but I’d not be raising my kids to think a weekly bath or shower is normal,or acceptable.

I’m an adult and only shower every three days otherwise the eczema flares up. Once or twice a week is plenty for children unless they are actually dirty.

You only wash your kids once a week and only with water??

In nappies mine had daily baths.

Then from about 3-10 more like only once or twice a week showers when swimming. Children had eczema and baths didn't really help (neither did swimming but that was a non negotiable in terms of life skills).

Then when prepubescent encouraging slightly more frequent washing, esp when hair started to look a bit greasy. But probably only 2-3 times per week. Eldest has lots of sensory issues as well as said eczema so we go for basically hygienic, rather than squeaky clean. It's less frequent than I wash but I'll take it...

Anyway I don't think once a week bath or shower is terrible especially when not in nappies (need cleaning more carefully) and not adolescent. Especially not if keeping face/hands broadly clean.

I don't think once a week is neglectful unless it's in conjunction with lots of other issues. And even then if you have a particularly sensitive/willful/ND child it can be a case of pick your battles...

Unless you bathe in Dettol, it doesn’t hurt the biome of your skin.

Eczema is usually a type of atopic dermatitis an allergic reaction to harsh cleaning products, not washing. Although a few rare individuals are allergic to water.

Eczema means an excellent, but over-active immune system. Not a poor one.

Grim!

I don’t scrub my kids skin, I pour some bubble bath under the tap, then they wallow around in it for 10 minutes. I pour jugs of the water over them and shampoo/rinse.

Just water tbh leaves people smelling worse than when they got in - it just isn’t enough. I’m all for limiting chemicals/UPFs and whatever, but just washing in water once a week is vile.

Just because children can be neglected in other (worse) ways, doesn't mean that being bathed only once a week isn't also a form of neglect

The thread that refers to though wasn’t just about bathing children. The beds are not changed for 1/2 months the bathroom not cleaned for a couple of months. Piles of laundry everywhere so yeah that’s neglect. Those poor children must smell.

I don’t think it’s neglect. If they’re hand washing, clean clothes etc in between then they’ll be a bit grimy but not filthy and neglect is the worst possible treatment - depriving them of food, hardly ever washing them, dog shit in the house, that kind of thing.

It’s definitely not any form of neglect.

Mine was washed once or twice a week when he was small. When he hit the teenage years he started showering daily. I think this is something that people get really worked up about, and really isn't a big deal. There is a wide range of normal.

Not sure that makes any odds TBH. Mine were bathed most days yet DD1 still went through a non washing stage at about 11 or 12

Thinking of it though we only had one bath a week as kids. We had a tin bath that involved filling it with buckets of water. But a wash down daily