To have elective surgery DH disagrees with?

[WhatWouldYouDoEh]

I'd be interested to know if anyone has been in a similar boat and what did you do?

"Surgery" might be a bit strong - it's LASEK or LASIK. Something I've wanted to do for a long time as I hate wearing glasses or contact lenses.

My DH has seemed supportive so far, but now I'm at the point where I've had an initial consultation and I'm suitable to go ahead, he has said he doesn't agree with me having it done. He's concerned about the potential complications (mainly driving at night).

Ultimately he will respect my decision and not stop me going ahead, but now there's a voice of doubt in my mind.

He called it "vanity" surgery and has said he doesn't think it's worth the risk.

I have dreamt of being free of glasses for years and can finally afford to make it a reality. I must admit now I am having doubts.

I had it done over 22 years ago, best thing I did, I struggle a bit with night vision, but don't really drive much at night, I do have to wear sun glasses every day in summer, I find the sun really bright, never regretted it, one thing I will say , my pain relief wore off to soon in the night, I was in lots of pain, but by morning it was fine.

@lesgalettes I'll PM you details.

I was seriously myopic (-7 and -6.5) with varifocal glasses and had cataracts 3 years ago at 54. I also had some double vision (diplopia I think is what it’s called) and was told it “could” be the cataracts causing it. With DH’s full support (emotional, physical and financial) I spent around £8k getting a full lens replacement. Surgery was no big deal, I was given some diazepam beforehand and the whole procedure took around 15-20 minutes on a Thursday afternoon and was back at work looking at a screen the very next Monday. For a couple of months I think I saw some halo-ing around car lights at night but I had it done in the height of summer so didn’t have much occasion to be out in the dark before that effect was gone.

It didn’t take long though before the double vision came back and I went to an orthoptic ophthalmologist who gave me plain glasses with a prism on one lens so I can drive. My vision really isn’t quite right - you want vanity, I can’t apply a winged liner anymore because I can’t close my left eye and see it from my right. I can’t sew, I can’t read small print without masses and masses of light (and even then it’s a crapshoot). It’s great being able to “see” enough as soon as I open my eyes in the morning but there’s a lot I feel I’m missing now. And I can’t just pick up a pair of high street reading glasses and make it ok - I think my left eye is basically fine but my right is definitely not. I just started a new job with private health insurance and am going to look into a private ophthalmologist and have resigned myself to the fact I may need glasses again forever.

I can’t tell you OP whether or not you should go ahead with your surgery but be prepared for it not to be the slam-dunk you may have built it up (totally reasonably! Glasses suck!) to be. Good luck.

It's approx £4200-£4500 for both eyes. I think high street companies like Optical Express, etc. might be a bit cheaper. But that seems to be the going rate to be treated in a private hospital setting.

I was -4 and -4.25, so not all that different. Unlike some here I had zero pain after, maybe what I needed was less invasive because it wasn't a strong correction.

According to the consultations I did have big pupils (news to me) and asked the doctor if that was good or bad, he replied "it just makes my job easier." My eyes are a pale colour so I always wore sunglasses anyways.

I’m a glasses/contact lens wearer but opted not to get this as it’s a lot of money and at best, buys you a few years of normality before your eyes start to deteriorate again. I know quite a few people young and old who have had it over the years and one who still needed glasses afterwards as it didn’t work. Everyone ends up wearing glasses eventually anyway but it’s personal choice at the end of the day.

I had it done 30 years ago and still have 20/20 vision for distance - now need glasses for reading though

Absolutely do not do this! The risks far outweigh any benefit! If you don’t mind me asking how old you are? Unless you are in your late 60s and are suffering from loss
of vision due to cataract then you should not go ahead! I have a lot of experience in the area and honesty you will end up in a worse position. Look up how many cases there are against these companies they are not regulated any of them.

Ps my prescription pre treatment was around -2 …. Lower the prescription better the result

I had it done 24 years ago and haven't regretted it for one single moment. Most definitely one of the best decisions I ever made!

And how old are you?
having the surgery done would be like wearing your glasses all the time, so if you currently take them off to read, you will lose that ability.

if you don’t have big pupils, or unusually shaped eyes, you’re unlikely to get significant night vision problems with the modern machines.

one of the worse decisions I ever made - driving at night is a nightmare and I still wear glasses. But check the odds of success and decide accordingly. Apparently, if you have large pupils, more risk of complications.

I had lasik when I was 50. I'm now 67 and still love it. I can still drive at night.

I had it done 10 years ago and it changed my life. I now wear glasses for reading, but had a very strong prescription for my distance vision which is still excellent. Wish I'd done it much sooner. It's your decision and nothing to do with your husband. If he would 'never let you forget it' were there to be any complications, he sounds like an real arse. He should be encouraging you to do something that will improve your quality of life.

I used to work for a fellow of the Royal College of Opthalmologists who did dozens of cataracts, lasik treatments, blepharoplasties, etc every day. He refused to have Lasik, as he felt the risks were too great. That tells me all I need to know.

I now can’t drive at night due to night blindness. I’ve loved the 15 years of no glasses but I regret my decision due to dry eyes.

I work with eight or nine eye consultants. None of them would have it done and it makes cataract surgery later much more difficult

My dh has really bad eye sight and even getting to -3 would be life changing. He hasn’t had it done and one of the reason is the risk of not being able to drive at night plus many others. Want to guess the profession of his father… Ophthalmologist! Been out with so many working in the same department and so many wear glasses.

Ahh man, it’s not vanity surgery, it’s life changing and really convenient. I don’t know your feelings towards how glasses make you look but they are a nuisance, they get steamed up, dirty, fall off, being able to see without them is liberating. I had mine done in 2009 and I can only describe it feeling like Dorothy stepping out of her house after the storm in wizard of oz and everything is bright and clear. I got glasses in 2020 for tv and driving at night but even still don’t hugely feel like I need them. The only thing I regret is not having them done sooner.

Don’t have lasek of lasik is an option. I have had both, lasek in one eye and lasik in the other. This was 15 years ago. The lasek eye I’ve had trouble with dryness and a very fragile cornea. I have pretty good sight in it but not nearly as good as the lasik eye which I have 20/20 vision with still. Absolutely do have it done though. My prescription was -7. It’s totally life changing

I had laser treatment for cataracts recently. Slightly different I know but I’ve had replacement lenses put in. Amazing results. Although I have mild prescription glasses now for reading I don’t actually have to wear them. Can see without fine

Are you having both eyes done at the same time?
Where i work we do eye surgery, for those very worried and/or concerned we do one eye at a time, i LOVE how the patients come back a month later for second eye to be done, ALL have said how its the best thing they've ever done.
Ive been working here for a few years now, to my knowledge theres never been any problems so complications must be very rare.
Go for it and good luck.

I’d totally do one eye at a time as I don’t like the idea of my eyes both being out of action.

I've just had mine done and it's the best decision ever. Recovery for me was a matter of hours - by this I mean the time I felt any sort of discomfort or like my life couldn't go on as normal.

I'm 3 weeks out. Have the odd feeling of dryness every now and then but nothing major. If you are a suitable candidate, risk is very very low.
The most important factor is how you take care of yourself afterwards to avoid infection, ect..

Honestly I had put it off for years for fear of the surgery itself. It's under 30 seconds per eye.

If you're in or near London happy to recommend where I went.

I'd say go for it! You'll be fine.

I think 'go for it! You'll be fine' is an irresponsible thing to say. Statistically it's pretty likely that OP will be 'fine' but there's certainly a chance she won't be. People on this thread have explained the ways in which they're not fine, including dry eyes, inability to drive at night and other problems. You don't know that OP won't fall into this category.