175k salary and all gone

[175allgone]

This will ruffle some feathers, but after tax, mortgage , childcare, living expenses….there doesn’t seem much left. SE London, commuting, wrap around care. Whilst I appreciate I’m not having to watch my bills I’m hardly living an extravagant lifestyle.

Ah you are right :) We got a letter through the other day to day we will qualify in September which should line up with our child starting nursery (currently childminder) the free hours will likely make it affordable for us to go up to three days a week which will make a huge difference to how much my husband will be able to work as we are self employed. I feel very lucky this has come in now.

It’s the childcare that’s killing you, we were in a similar position and made some adjustments so both our net adjusted incomes were under 100K. We ended up financially better off, worked less hours and got a new car out of it.
If you haven’t considered it it might be worth it.

Ahaha. Yeah their £250 a month are more than my taxes. Sure. Newsflash - high earners ALSO pay council tax.
and state services aren’t only roads and council services anyway. The taxes pay for pensions, social care, etc etc etc, in addition to what I already listed (police, schools, NHS, all civil service, MPs)

I mean, we're on less than 25k a year as a family but I still don't think you're being unreasonable. If I understand what you're saying correctly it's pretty reasonable to assume that on a salary as gorgeously plump as yours you would expect to have some disposable income and not have to be watching the purse strings. The cost of living and the cost of childcare, not to mention the price of living in the city is extortionate.

I'm a low earner but OP's situation worries me. It should worry everyone who has any comprehension of the world they live in which I understand is lacking amongst many.
All our services, infrastructure, benefits for lower income families depend on taxation and economy. Revenue depends on people aspiring to be higher earners and paying higher taxes. Economy depends on spending power. People need to spend money to support businesses and contribute to revenue by paying VAT on products and services. If even familes like OP's have not much left it's a bad sign for the country.

4k childcare costs for 2 children are absolutely accurate in South East. Two high earners can't just go part time and if they did that would hugely affect their future earnings. Childcare and mortgage costs explain why so many people decide not have children. On larger scale this will contribute to higher taxes , less public spending and higher retirement age.

Some parts of the country are cheaper but even if families from South East were able to move there would you want them inflating prices and taking school places?
People should not be blamed for not living up north, for having a job and paying childcare costs or for deciding to have children when they did all the things a person can do to be prepared to have them like having a good job , house etc.

I do work hard in a low paying job but I have enough common sense to understand that getting promoted and being a high earner takes extra effort and commitment. It often requires expensive education, long hours, extra stress and responsibility.
The main reason people aspire to climb career ladder is to provide better for themselves and their families. Obviously people on low incomes should not be their point of reference despite acknowledging they are worse off.

I'm also fully aware that women who have cheap mortgage or live in social housing and didn't work or worked part time when kids were little simply will not understand the cost of childcare or housing around London, especially when you're not eligible for any help. All they see is big salary and they start mocking and criticising so I hope OP will ignore nasty comments.

Most people could not tolerate either, let alone the combination.

@175allgone
How about all the posts suggesting a nanny or moving to a commutable area with slightly cheaper housing (it's all expensive in the SE isn't it). The nursery years are hard on your income.

Please keep working, particularly in a career you love. I know loads of people who have moved out of London. The ones who have stayed in London have been extremely high earners, probably double your income

You're incorrect. Poor people will cost revenue more during their life time then they pay in. When you take into account schooling, pension , healthcare, benefits etc. Higher earners also pay council tax, only higher because they have more expensive houses plus they will be paying higher income tax and will also buy more products and services so paying more VAT. On other hand they will take very little from the system because they won't get child benefit, free childcare, are less likely to use NHS and state schools. Majority of revenue is generated by small amount of top earners.

I say that as a lower earner who simply knows facts.

You’re not in “the south east” - you’re in Islington. That is your problem.

Sell up and move to Lewisham and you’ll instantly free up £1.5m quid.

Not necessarily. Only one child and a mortgage it is easy to not be eligible for UC. If they both work a certain with two children they won't be eligible. It is quite a low threshold.

I knew you’d get some snippy responses OP but I sympathise fully being in a similar situation. DH and I have a joint income of just under £200k and with two young children in childcare we don’t lead a remotely luxurious lifestyle. Out of interest if your salary is 175, what’s your partners - surely that is all disposable if yours alone covers mortgage, bills and childcare ? If they don’t work, why do you pay for childcare?

They would still be eligible in that case but yeah it would be low.

I’m a public sector worker on less than a quarter of OPs salary and so is DH, but I think the snippy mocking comments are unnecessary. Seems the more recent comments are more measured and thoughtful .
I often wonder how people manage. We manage because we bought our modest zone 3 flat 20 years ago and got a 20% interest free loan key worker as a deposit . Then I inherited a generous amount of money from my DGF and brought the mortgage repayments right down. I’ve always cycled or walked to work, the only car we ever had was a cast off from my SIL and it lasted 18months. But still, with 2 kids in childcare there were stressful ends of the month for years.

Out of interest OP, what were you hoping for from this thread? I understand very well that the more you earn, the more you spend. That said, you know very well that what you earn is a great deal more than the 'average' person, even in the SE. So it's hard to see that you're not just trying to be inflammatory.

Omg this is so sad, I'm crying. Poor you.

Though if OP is talking about total household income rather than her own salary, I'll temper my reserve a little!

Our bills are more than £1k and we live in a 3 bed semi in the midlands! We earn £50k between us and manage…..

4k in childcare is WILD. Is this just a London thing? I’m in Manchester and have 1 daughter in an outstanding childminder and she costs £43 a day and she is in 4 days a week. There are nursery’s around us that are £80 but we chose a childminder for that very reason. Obviously I know London is more expensive but is there cheaper childcare options such as a childminder?

Wow £43 is blowing my mind, is that a half day?We pay £2k a month for my son’s nursery, he goes 4 days a week. The nursery he’s at offer half days but the hours are totally unworkable - 7:30-13:00 etc so we have to pay for a full day even though he doesn’t attend for a full day. We did try a couple of childminders but the experience wasn’t great unfortunately. Also most child minders found here have waiting lists. We’re in Surrey and on low wages for the area. I know people say to move out of the area but we are tied to elderly parents and I wouldn’t want to leave them.

boo fucking hoo! my household income is 1/4 of that and we have 3 kids and even we manage some disposable income. You definitely can afford a nice lifestyle without worrying about money!

Childminders near me in zone 5 are £90 a day, 8-6, so still just around 2K a month. Cheaper ones are £80

You are not being unreasonable. The cost of living is unreasonably high. I don’t know how much longer costs can keep increasing. It’s very disheartening

You need to actually go through your bills. Go through every single direct debit and see what it is for. Do you need all the TV subscriptions? Do you buy a sandwich deal while working instead of making a packed lunch? Are you paying for a gym but not actually going? Are you buying new clothes rather than using Vinted etc? Coffee shop visits add up. Your mortgage sounds like you might be on a fixed rate right now so you need to think about will you be able to afford the payment with new interest rates. People see the headline salary and won't feel sorry for you I'm afraid but you can see where you can make savings if needed. Cheaper holiday this year?

Im in west London £55/60 a day is typical for childminders here.