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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want him to "finish" inside me...

97 replies

fairyliquidbubbles · 19/05/2024 20:57

Apologies for the un-minced wording here but here goes:

Since becoming a mum a year ago, I have found it very inconvenient for my husband to "finish" inside me after sex.

Generally we have sex right before sleep and it just seems to be dripping out for ages afterward making my underwear and pajamas wet and uncomfortable. Not to mention the bedsheets. All just feels messy and leaves me feeling unhygienic.

Equally I don't particularly enjoy the other options. Aka him finishing "on" me.

I not sure I experienced these feelings/ distaste towards the above, pre baby.

Wondered if anyone else feels like this? Any tips / tricks/ hacks?

OP posts:
0hno · 19/05/2024 21:15

CurlewKate · 19/05/2024 21:12

Are you sure it's semen, not your urine or some sort of discharge? There isn't that much semen per ejaculation, whatever the porn movies say.......

Mine dribbles for ages. Also can smell sex I myself even after a shower if I have one straight away

MillshakePickle · 19/05/2024 21:15

Pee post sex and use a peri bottle with warm slightly soapy water. Sit there a couple mins drip fry and them pat. Sorted.

It's not fool proof though.

Or change positions. Avoid positions where you're on your back

MillshakePickle · 19/05/2024 21:16

MillshakePickle · 19/05/2024 21:15

Pee post sex and use a peri bottle with warm slightly soapy water. Sit there a couple mins drip fry and them pat. Sorted.

It's not fool proof though.

Or change positions. Avoid positions where you're on your back

Drip dry...don't fry your fanny, it's never recommended

0hno · 19/05/2024 21:16

MillshakePickle · 19/05/2024 21:15

Pee post sex and use a peri bottle with warm slightly soapy water. Sit there a couple mins drip fry and them pat. Sorted.

It's not fool proof though.

Or change positions. Avoid positions where you're on your back

What's a peri bottle?

Immemorialelms · 19/05/2024 21:16

God yeah it lasts for ages and makes you feel all damp. Even after a shower and mop up I have to mop up again later. or I get thrush

YellowCloud · 19/05/2024 21:17

I feel like a wee straight after (which you should be doing anyway) plus a quick shower, and surely all is okay once you get back in bed??

Scissor · 19/05/2024 21:17

Get yourself a diaphragm / cap, old school but still prescribed by NHS. Remove after and everything is there to be washed away.

SwordToFlamethrower · 19/05/2024 21:18

My ex used to finish into his hand.
My husband and I have a sex blanket we place on the bed, that catches the sex products and it goes in the wash.

When you go to the loo, give a little push to help the ejaculate out, I usually clean up with the shower head too, for extra freshness.

WithACatLikeTread · 19/05/2024 21:18

Could you stick a towel underneath during it? Or some wipes next to you. My husband can be generous but it doesn't tend to get everywhere. Just need to move quick. Although sometimes I seem to have sucked it up and it comes out next day. Weird. 😳

MarkandElizabethForever · 19/05/2024 21:20

This happens to me but it's not semen, it's actually me from having an orgasm. I always go the loo after and that sorts most of it. I tend to just put a towel over where the sheet is wet. The only other option is a condom🤷‍♀️

Notamum12345577 · 19/05/2024 21:20

bloodyplumbing · 19/05/2024 21:14

@YouJustDoYou how much do you think there is to "go everywhere", I sincerely hope OP makes zero "mess" during sex, also that her DH insists she doesn't come on his cock.

Lady juice?😁 That can make the sheets pretty wet

CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 19/05/2024 21:20

Pants and pantyliner or light flow pad.
I have reusable ones so they just go in the wash later. Easy!

saveforthat · 19/05/2024 21:20

SwordToFlamethrower · 19/05/2024 21:18

My ex used to finish into his hand.
My husband and I have a sex blanket we place on the bed, that catches the sex products and it goes in the wash.

When you go to the loo, give a little push to help the ejaculate out, I usually clean up with the shower head too, for extra freshness.

Does your DH have a penis beaker?

Username947531 · 19/05/2024 21:20

BambooDawn · 19/05/2024 21:15

A while ago - not sure where I heard this, maybe MN - someone said they use a tampon after sex. That's what I now do as I also hate the dribbly mess afterwards (and yes, I go to the loo and also shower and it still seems to leak out for ages - maybe depends on the 'shape' of your vagina?!!
Anyway I use a tampon and remove it in the morning and job done.

Please please do not do this. Very dangerous to use tampons when it is not your period.

PhuckyNell · 19/05/2024 21:22

who's going to be showering at bloody midnight? Not me!

I do what a pp said and out knickers and a bit of toilet roll in 😂

I do know what you mean because if I forget to I am woken up by an itchy dribble 🙄 🤣

Businessflake · 19/05/2024 21:25

Howling at someone using the terms sex blanket and sex products 😂

GoodVibesHere · 19/05/2024 21:28

MillshakePickle · 19/05/2024 21:15

Pee post sex and use a peri bottle with warm slightly soapy water. Sit there a couple mins drip fry and them pat. Sorted.

It's not fool proof though.

Or change positions. Avoid positions where you're on your back

What on earth is a peri-bottle?

Devilsmommy · 19/05/2024 21:31

saveforthat · 19/05/2024 21:20

Does your DH have a penis beaker?

Show quote history

😆😆😆😆

Doseofreality · 19/05/2024 21:32

You need a penis beaker for him to spunk in to, that or he jizzes on to the curtains.

PaintDiagram · 19/05/2024 21:32

Businessflake · 19/05/2024 21:25

Howling at someone using the terms sex blanket and sex products 😂

Guessing you loved the penis beaker thread 🪡

LondonFox · 19/05/2024 21:33

Pee, quick wash with water (outside only) and a pad.
I have incontinence ones (extra long and big) since childbirth and they will absorb it all in whatever position you sleep.

GrowThroughWhatYouGoThrough · 19/05/2024 21:33

Have sex at a different time of day

JanglingJack · 19/05/2024 21:34

Who wants to get up, shower, peri (?) their fanny after having sex in bed before sleep?
I've always found that I have leakage quite a while after, so that wouldn't help.

As to your wondering @fairyliquidbubbles it's because you have a baby and you're mind and body is not ready for another one. It's nature. I bet there was a time when you only wanted him to finish inside you.

The urge may come back!

I recommend keeping lined pants by the bed so you can put them on and conk out.

Or... Get a fanny beaker 🤣

Wherewerewerewear · 19/05/2024 21:36

Businessflake · 19/05/2024 21:25

Howling at someone using the terms sex blanket and sex products 😂

It was the ‘don't dry your fanny, it's never recommended’ that made me laugh 😆😂