Salt burn makes me worry for poor kids at ‘posh’ unis.

[Pippetypoppity]

Im beginning to think certain Universities have much wealthier students on average and a kid from a poorer background would have a hard time perhaps ? Oliver in Saltburn was almost ostracised. Dc is looking at Exeter and Bath as favs. Not going to have any of the spending money, nice things from home the private school kids there will have I’m guessing. Will they have a hard time and be excluded in any way do you think. Horrible to think that as pretty shy and socially awkward anyway 🥹.

No, maybe just your interpretation of events is about your own social Hang ups and maybe not to do with how others would interpret it?

Bath and Exeter aren’t “Posh!”
Let your son enjoy his time without parental angst.
He’ll likely meet people he feels comfy with.

Op, you are absolutely right, but there are many other things you should be worried about than your dcs’ universities being like Saltburn.
Never go to the Yorkshire moors - who knows, Heathcliff could easily be lurking, waiting to hang your dog.
If you go to Oregon or Montana avoid hotels like the plague: Remember those scenes in The Shining? That could be you……
Likewise, motels in Fairvale, California.
Transylvania is supposed to be beautiful but don’t go there. Those fangs could be coming to your throat sooner than you think….

Same here. Only two of us on my course had been to a comprehensive school (this was decades ago) and I was the only one who hadn't studied Latin. Everyone was lovely and it wasn't a big deal at all. In fact my horizons expanded in a way that I don't think they would have done if I'd gone somewhere where more / most people were like me.

Okeydokes. If you're saying that not a single one of the tropes/stereotypes shown in Saltburn has any basis in real life events/facts at all, then we might just need to agree to disagree! I'm glad your experience at Oxbridge didn't expose you to any snobbery/tribalism/class division though - nice to know that people can come through unscathed 😁

it is a film, it is not real.

plus, Bath and Exeter unis are not posh universities, Bath is not even a russel group.

you are over thinking it.

Missing the point entirely...
Oliver in Saltburn wasn't a poor kid. His problems fitting in at college were because he was strange.

Did you actually watch the entirely fictional film? The point is he wasn't a poor kid, he was a middle-class boy trying to make himself seem more interesting.
Also... fictional.

the % of private school/ privileged state school at childs top 10 uni is shocking! yes my child has found it difficult especially when exposed to comments like " his family are so poor they had family time playing board games, whereas I had expensive holidays and meals out" That's a friend about a potential boyfriend as questioning whether they were compatible. No idea regarding Bath but Exeter seems more normal!

I love Emerald Fennel but the whole MC boy wanting to be like the rich poshos just showed how out of touch she was with, well non-poshos!

Absolutely. One of the things I remember most was discovering people who knew what they wanted to do for a living, and it was in a field I didn't even know existed, like opera directing or art restoration. That was a complete eye-opener for me, as the first in my family to stay in school past 15, and whose relatives were all shelfstackers, waitresses, cab drivers, mechanics and binmen.

I mean, everyone wasn't completely lovely, in my experience, but I wasn't scarred by encountering an average amount of assholes or anything.

Spoiler: But if he does go the way of Oliver, look at the magnificent house you'll end up with! 😄

You have raised a child who has done well enough in their school career to be looking at good universities. That’s a huge achievement both for you and for them.

Two of my GCs go to Exeter. It’s not posh. It’s just a uni with a mix of students.🤷‍♀️

You realise that Saltburn was fiction? Don't you?

The OP is getting some mean comments - actually, I think the movie reference worked as a good entry point into a really interesting discussion.

It's about social mobility, British class + wealth barriers, - and how universities can offer positive exposure to people with very different backgrounds, values and perspectives - and generally better equip people to navigate in society (including, if they want, upwards - see point (a) about social mobility!!)

If what you took from Saltburn was that it was about a poor kid being treat badly and not fitting in because he was poor then I think you completely missed the whole point of the film.

It was ever thus.

I turned down a place at Cambridge in the 90s, as the open day, interview, communication from 2nd year they wanted to mentor me before arrival and feel of the place, the accents of the students showing me round made me feel so poor. I knew this free school meals kid from a single parent family would never fit it.

@AlltheFs my DD went to an all girls school in Belgravia and most lived within a five minute walk (she had an hour walk/tube). She said no issues - she was more envious that they got more time in bed in the morning!
OP, most privately educated kids are pretty down to earth and normal and not particularly wealthy. And there are some state school kids who have fairly wealthy backgrounds. There's 'reputation' and reality.

The Saltburn guy was middle class. Also most uc I met at my "posh uni" were perfectly nice.

Honestly it's fiction. In more than one sense.

I went to Exeter in 2009 as a poor kid and absolutely yes there is a divide between rich and poor. I now work somewhere where plenty of poor Exeter students work part time and yes they struggle emotionally and financially because most of the kids there don't need to work. It didn't really bother me though, but I can see why it bothers them.

You would have been fine, and you shot yourself soundly in the foot, there, mate.

Inverted snobbery is foolish.

Except even the film did no such thing.

I went to Bath. I had a good education but not boarding. Lots of other people there came from boarding schools. Also a lot of them had lived all over the world (or their parents’ had) and I remember thinking how confident everyone was.. I was quite shy. But had a good time. I came from a big city so actually found Bath quite small and a bit tedious… although in hindsight I think it’s a good place to spread your wings for the first time! I wouldn’t worry too much based on a fictional TV series…