No shorts at my wedding

[MumOfHals]

I'm getting married in Spain, in a really formal venue. I want to ask the men NOT to wear shorts for the ceremony, AIBU lol?

How can I word on the invite NO SHORTS?

Dress code:

Summer elegance for the ladies and matching formal attire for the men. NO SHORTS ( just doesn't flow well LOL)

It would be really helpful if the formal venue didn't allow shorts.

If you are getting married in the summer, in Spain it feels a tiny bit unreasonable not to let people wear shorts. Why do you want your loved ones to be uncomfortable. I'd rather shorts and knees than crumpled linen suits.

I am willing to bet that Spanish men going to a nice wedding in Spain wouldn’t be wearing shorts. Dunno why English men can’t put up with it…..

This sums it up pretty well.

It’s absolutely fine to say formal attire, including long trousers.

it’s an invitation not a summons. If anyone has a problem with it they don’t have to attend.

I don't think this is unreasonable tbh, in the context of Spanish weddings, which are quite different to UK weddings in many ways.
@MumOfHals which part of Spain, what time of year, and what time of day? Will the other guests be Spanish?

As a rule weddings in Spain are extremely formal - think dressing for a gala more than dressing for a garden party - and if you have selected a formal venue I understand where you're coming from. Having said that, British guests who are not used to Spanish weather or dress codes might not know this or understand, so it's a bit delicate. Agree with PP you could put "formal - no black tie" or similar on the invitations as most people will know what this means and select chinos etc. Your guests will have spent money and probably taken annual leave to attend, so you want to make them feel welcome, while giving them enough information to know what to expect. Because on the flip side I'm not sure anyone would want to be "that one person" who turns up wearing shorts at 7pm when everyone else is in jackets and long trousers, and still eating outside at gone midnight!

Most Spanish weddings I've been to start late, ceremony at 7.30pm for example with dinner at 10pm (I've been to one with dinner starting at midnight :-O), which is specifically to avoid the killer afternoon heat. By the time you go home at 3am it can be quite chilly! My (Spanish) husband always wears his full suit including jacket, leather shoes and tie on properly for the ceremony, no matter the temp, and his family and friends (as far as I have seen) do the same, as a mark of respect for the occasion. These days I've noticed many men wearing braces and bow ties without a jacket. I've yet to see anyone wear shorts, ever. I think this is one of those rare situations where women draw the long straw in life😆

I also think that on the day you probably won't even notice what other people wear, let alone let it bother you :)

One thing- if you are expecting it to be very hot, consider providing fans as gifts for guests as they arrive. The guests, particularly those not used to hot weather, will thank you for it! And they can keep them as a reminder and use them in UK heatwaves ;-)

No one has said they can’t. Why is anyone assuming that these English men are going to turn up in shorts anyway? We went to a wedding in Spain last year, lots of English guests. No one worse shorts, and no one had to be told not to, either. The vast majority of people are able to dress themselves appropriately without being told what to wear.

I agree with this. Shorts to a formal event or wedding in Spain? Only tourists would think of that.

@MumOfHals Your polite request is perfectly reasonable.

To all those who can't simply envisage being in Spain without your man wearing shorts perhaps introduce him to lightweight summer trousers or linen trousers.

I would word it

the service dress code is ladies - summer elegance , gentlemen - formal, long trousers jackets not required (unless you want them that is 😂).

the reception- summer elegant/casual.

then the men can change into more comfortable clothes if they like

@Bluevelvetsofa

Was about to say the same. I've seen some absolutely ghastly suggestions as wedding guest attire on style and beauty here, as far from elegant as you can get, far more "look at me". I think tailored shorts are the least of the worries.

This is like a reverse of what Bernie Saunders wore to the Presidential Inauguration with the mittens 😆

Just put

”The couple kindly requests no nobbly knees at the ceremony.”

What if a woman has an above the knee dress and nobbly knees?

I find it curious that there's so many cool posters on this thread who are fine for guests to wear whatever they want to a wedding, yet on literally any other wedding attire thread on MN people are clutching their pearls at the very idea of exposed shoulders 😱or anything above the knee, or anything that has more shape than a hessian sack, or shows cleavage, or anything remotely white, or black, or red, or anything that could be remotely considered bridesmaidy, oh and make sure you put a blazer over it! 🙄
But nooo on this thread, OP is a bridezilla apparently...

😆 just get the popcorn

Is it possible you’re overthinking it? I’ve been to loads of weddings in the south of France and not once has any chap over the age of 10 appeared in shorts, despite this not being indicated on the invitation. The most recent one included more than a few Americans and Brits, and still not a make knobbly knee in sight.

@MumOfHals wouldn't like Bermuda.

"Men's Custom-Fit Shorts Collection - SPOKE - SPOKE" https://spoke-london.com/collections/shorts

Direct them here

My father is an old school gentleman, in his 80, and in his mind shorts are good for camping and beaches. In the city it's a big no. There are linen trousers. Anyway, summer suits are also a thing. They are nice and light.

I didn’t notice what anyone wore to my wedding on the day. I was too busy getting married and having fun. I might have noticed someone in a mourning veil or something, but generally people know how to dress to suit an occasion.

What's the reason for getting married in Spain? If you are expecting guests to come to a destination wedding and spending a sum of money to travel there, I wouldn't be imposing a dress code

ive only read your posts OP. Could you put:
Summer elegance for the ladies and Lightweight suits for the men.

I’d lose the matching but as people may think you mean literal matching.

although ‘summer elegance’ is a bit blurgh so I’d put something like this:

dress code: semi-formal attire such as cocktail-length dress or dressy separates for women and a lightweight suit (tie optional) for men.

I went to a fairly fancy wedding in Spain, majority British guests. It was 30 degrees and no one wore shorts, I wouldn’t worry.

FWIW I agree with you OP. I didn't want strapless dresses at my church wedding. Was a small wedding though and our attendees knew my thoughts on it so didn't need to put it in the invitation.

What does the “matching” mean? If it’s that you want couples/families to coordinate their outfit then I see what it means and find it ridiculous. If you don’t then the word is superfluous.

no matter what you say, someone will still wear shorts