To think most women on here hate men

[Tanyahawkes]

Sorry for the rant but I’m noticing a pattern on mn, any post involving a man and a disagreement results in multiple calls of he’s a narcissist, he’s abusing, he’s controlling, leave the bastard!

I’ll admit that a list of posts do involve behaviour that is not nice from dh and dp. So many posts also can be interpreted in many ways too, I just feel like a large number of women jump to the worst conclusion first about a strangers partner, having only one side of a story told in a short version.

for anyone misunderstanding me, if a post says the partner is hurting physically, calling names, cheating, putting the op down, then yes I agree, ltb (so long as the post is true) it’s when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye” and everyone calls the poor guy a narcissist etc

What you’re seeing on MN is women speaking out freely, sometimes you might not like it, and you might disagree with what some say, but so what? That’s life, if you don’t like it scroll on.

this is your words, copied and pasted, yet you didn’t like what I wrote, and wouldn’t move on

hypocritical a little bit wouldn’t you say

I think the bloke in that post sounds like an absolute twat.

Equality is just that, equal, it seems as though the sales are tipping in the other direction from history, or at least posts on here.

I'd post a crying laughing emoji if I didn't believe those are the emoji equivalent of multiple exclamation marks.

Equality would be women killing 3 men a week. We don't want that, we want the end to the patriarchy. Start with Chimamanda, then Germaine, finally Andrea. You'll be LTBing in no time. 👊

It’s funny how 30% say not being unreasonable, but the resounding cry mostly is “females, speak up, have your opinion, so long as it matches 70% of mumsnet

The shark has just been jumped.

If you think that female posters on this forum think that women posting about being emotionally, financially, sexually and physically abused is the "icing on the cake" then that is... Well I can't say what it is because I'm flabbergasted that someone would actually type that out

Are you there yet, Tanya? You've been going for ages, it can't take that much longer?

I was just trying to read through it but yes.
OP, you can see all of these points? No?
It is just about actually hearing what the poster is saying but also trying to get empathetic about how she feels and felt at the time. It can be hard for men to learn to do this, which is why it's like learning a new language for a lot of men and because it isn't easy a lot don't want to do it. Some men flourish at it and flex it like a muscle. Anyone can gain empathy in my opinion, reading helps a lot as you have to suspend your sense of self to really get into the characters. More men should read I think.

Thankfully pretty much every man I know irl is a good guy. Almost every ’partner’ I read about on MN sounds awful - stands to reason as it’s the people with problems who post for advice. So no I don’t hate men at all but if you read my responses to many posters on here I guess you could be forgiven for thinking otherwise as obviously I do have a problem with men who behave badly (and women who behave badly).

There's a certain kind of person who uses 'females' rather than 'women'.

There’s a difference between wanting validation in a blanket statement that MN ‘hates’ men (rather than being one of the few places left that doesn’t excuse shitty male behaviour in the many many forms it presents itself) l, and freely giving a response to that opening post in disagreement. Especially when the original poster’s only given example of ‘wrongful LTB’ is very much a classic case of shitty male behaviour.

Except nobody told you you can't have your opinion, however biased and incorrect it is.

And nobody will threaten you with stalking, rape or death if you keep posting internalised misogyny.

You came here to scold women for their opinions. It didn't work out for you. You can learn from that, or keep doubling down.

There certainly is.

Isn't there just

Sure it's already been said, but generally noone comes here to post about how lovely their quite normal, non-bastard partners are. When you see posts, it's because there's a problem - and generally this veers between thoughtlessness, selfishness and utter abuse by the men in question. First one can possibly be sorted, 2nd more tricky, and 3rd - well you should just leave. It's important as we model our relationships to our children and if they grow up in such an environment that is not challenged then the cycle continues. We need to call it out for what it is. It's not man-hating, it's behaviour hating. Women behaving in the same way would be equally berated, but it's far less common, or at least you won't see it here.

Lol. It’s mumsnet, a discussion site.

You’ve started a post accusing mean women of hating men, of saying LTB based on nothing (except it’s not nothing, it’s behaviour many of us recognise of old), and we’re defending our opinions. As we are all allowed to do.

I’m quite enjoying this discussion, I’m appreciating posts from some great posters, so I’m sticking around. If my posts upset you, and that’s certainly not my intention, then sure, reply, but if you’re not enjoying them or getting anything out of them ignore them.

No do carry on, I’m sure my skin is sufficiently thick enough to withstand you saying I am in fact stupid 🤣

Exactly.

It’s a terrible example.

It’s always interesting to hear views, no matter if I agree or not, and I’ll also agree with a huge amount of what’s said in here, even if only about 3 people have noticed I’ve actually agreed with a fair bit

You're terrified of a woman-centred parenting/lifestyle website and find it a threat to men's societal equality, and you think you're well hard? Tanya?

But you’re agreeing whilst telling us off for being mean about men, and suggesting that our behaviour (calling out shitty men) is on a par with men being abusive scumbags - do you not see how bonkers and wrong that is?

I liken it to what I've heard about policemen. Many (apparently) don't want kids because all the kids they encounter are yobs and thugs.

Same for MN. As others have said, women come here to moan, so it's easy to think that all men are like that, when in reality, we're only seeing the worst 1% (arbitrary %).

Conversely, you'll never see women admitting to what they've done. They'll say in an argument that he called her names and be told to ltb, but omit the part where she kicked his dog first, for example.

I must in fact be a man then