To think most women on here hate men

[Tanyahawkes]

Sorry for the rant but I’m noticing a pattern on mn, any post involving a man and a disagreement results in multiple calls of he’s a narcissist, he’s abusing, he’s controlling, leave the bastard!

I’ll admit that a list of posts do involve behaviour that is not nice from dh and dp. So many posts also can be interpreted in many ways too, I just feel like a large number of women jump to the worst conclusion first about a strangers partner, having only one side of a story told in a short version.

for anyone misunderstanding me, if a post says the partner is hurting physically, calling names, cheating, putting the op down, then yes I agree, ltb (so long as the post is true) it’s when a post says “great relationship, today partner upset me and we couldn’t see eye to eye” and everyone calls the poor guy a narcissist etc

@MarioIa but again, it is not our society dictating anything, it is men who are doing the dictating. Bar the last 75 or so years, they have been solely in charge! As I've said, they need to get their own house in order.

And you could do with looking at the difference between equality and equity as the two terms are used interchangeably and often incorrectly. Women cannot just be treated like men in pursuit of equality. We are completely different. Women spend 30+ years menstruating, women give birth, women go through menopause etc etc. Women need additional support as a result of their biology. Give me an extra 5 years at work instead of the physical, psychological and emotional toll of periods, menstruation, pregnancy, childbirth and child rearing any day!

@CurlewKate, read my comment again. It wouldn't be me describing him like that, but how many posters would choose to interpret it to suit their narrative of male abuse.

Men are much worse at addressing health issues and part of that is the way our society dictates that men shouldn't complain/boys don't cry etc.

And you know who has dictated that society - men

I've never yet met a feminist who thinks men shouldn't complain or boys shouldn't cry. I've met plenty who have been willing to talk about why the patriarchy doesn't actually serve men either because of issues like this. But men have fought women every step of the way when they have tried to change this. Plenty of men have fought other men every step of the way when they have tried to change this.

And every once is awhile it would be nice to have a conversation around the abuse of women without someone popping up to derail the thread about men killing themselves and other men.

You want to do something around men's health and men's suicide rates go for it. You will probably find plenty of women support you. In fact in my workplace it was recently pointed out that loads of women turned up for evens around men's health to see how they could support the men in their lives. Yet hardly any men turned up for women's health events to see how they could support women in their lives...

Women are already showing up for men. If men won't show up for themselves then that's on them unfortunately

Just a quick calculation: the average woman will spend nearly 6 years on their period over the course of their lives. These biological differences must be accounted for in order for us to achieve true equality.

Men have had lower life expectancies for decades, probably longer, and yet worked an extra five years up until recently.

The sheer stupidity of complaining on behalf of men that the retirement age was later for men when men were the ones setting the retirement age

Its like complaining to the staff that there's no one in on a Sunday when you are the boss and you set the working hours and haven't scheduled anyone in on a Sunday

You don't get to be the ones in charge, make the rules and then complain you don't like the rules.

Women are already showing up for men. If men won't show up for themselves then that's on them unfortunately
Here we go! Women have many reasons why they can't fight for themselves -which I agree with-, but men, no excuses whatsoever, if they can't fight for themselves, women are not interested in hearing why, it's their problem.

Standard MN!

This.

I mean I'm talking about workplace sponsored events about gendered health issues

What is the reason men can't turn up to talks about men's health problems?

What is the reason men can't turn up to talks about men's health problems?
Maybe we can start a thread on this. I can already give quite a number of valid reasons from their perspective. Until recently, women didn't like to talk about the menopause either. Why was that?

It's because of today's feminists that the government are making it law new non-domestic buildings in England must have single-sex toilets.

It's because of today's feminists in South America that that they have secured several landmarks that legalise abortion during the first 24 weeks of pregnancy.

It's because of today's feminists in Scotland that Scotland passed the Period Products bill, which makes free menstrual products available in public restrooms.

Men have had lower life expectancies for decades, probably longer, and yet worked an extra five years up until recently.

Men didn't set the lower retirement age for women from the goodness of their heart.

The reason is because men usually married younger women so they needed women to retire early in order to care for the retired man in the home, as well as to provide care for elders.

Go for it, it's sounds like an interesting topic for a thread and would stop derailing this one

@PamPamPamPam Eh?!! What has periods got to do with anything?!

I'm going to assume you're being purposefully antagonistic so I'm not going to respond to you-I have included enough information in my previous posts (and there's plenty of literature out there that you can read) on the importance of accounting for biological differences in any conversation about "equality".

You’ve clearly been completely brainwashed by your partner - LTB 😜

I agree.

Fair enough if the bloke concerned is drug addled wife beater etc but when you get someone saying ‘he’s a hard worker, passionate, great with the kids, supportive of me but he went out for his brother’s stag night and woke up in the flowerbeds last night. The last time he got this pissed was for the millennium’ and everyone is responding ‘LTB, he’s clearly a functioning alcoholic’ and I’m thinking ‘really? You’d end a marriage for one mistake?’

It's strange as when I was younger I generally enjoyed the company of men more. Do they start off nice and become knobheads as they get older?!

Many of us grow up with poor male behaviour as standard. Brought up to believe that this is how men behave, and women are the ones who are the default parent, default cook, cleaner, bottle washer, who allows her incredible husband to treat her badly, because she literally doesn’t know any better.

Then you get older, and if you’re lucky you stumble across MN and the FWR boards or you see the advice given, and you start off thinking “fucking hell, what a mean bunch!” And “poor men”, and eventually you recognise what they are saying in your own life - in your husband, your father, your brother, your friend, and you slowly come to the realisation that you’ve put up with this socially accepted bullshit for long enough.
You wonder how your mother, sister, sister in law, aunt, neighbour haven’t seen it, while they’re still defending their dickish partners. And they may not be perfect themselves, but they are still the ones doing the metaphorical heavy lifting within the family, as happens in the majority of families, even when they don’t recognise it.
You see it in more men than you could ever imagine, you see the injustice of women being called out for being able to see it (going to add The Rules of Misogyny at the end for anyone who hasn’t seen them yet!).

The men were always the same, it’s women who learn to see and stop putting up with it.

There’s a reason why liberal feminism has been accepted by patriarchal societies, and that’s because it centres men. It calls sex work and porn empowering, blindly ignoring trafficking and the danger these women are often in. Who benefits from prostitutes and porn? Mostly men.
The women spewing this “sex work is work” nonsense tend to be women who are still at the stage where they are pickme’s who still desperately want to please men.

This made me think.

It seems that on most MNetters hate pretty much everything here.
That’s why I most likely keep coming to this place.
I’m a miserable bastard and enjoy reading people being even more angry about things than I am.

Forgot to add the rules of misogyny!

But only 7% of UK women identify as feminists going by the study done by the feminist org Fawcett Society. I think it's naive to think that men aren't massively influenced by women. Part of the reason why men don't want to appear weak is because women on the whole prefer assertive men.

And I've heard that argument so many times on here about men needing to sort their own issues out, but feminists will often actively object against things like International Men's Day.

Some examples that spring to mind are the councillor Jess Phillips sniggering in parliament as a man outlines his proposal to have a day to talk about things like male suicide (the no1 killer of men under 50). When he asks her what's so funny she replies "oh well, every day is men's day".

I was cringing because we're talking about the single biggest killer of young men and obviously the men committing suicide probably weren't living the dream. If this had been a man laughing as a woman talks about other women dying he'd have likely lost his job.

Anotht example I read about on here was York University cancelling IMD due to a petition signed by 300 feminists. They released a statement saying that they would 'instead focus on the problems faced by women'. And this was days after a male student committed suicide.

So, I'm not in any way downplaying the issues we face as women. It's just naive to think that life is a walk in the park for men and most people spouting this rubbish don't even have a good overview of the facts, they just parrot what they've read online.

It's always been a few powerful men at the top and the rest as cannon fodder. I wouldn't want to have been a man in the trenches during
WW1/WW2 or right now in Ukraine tbh.

@Tanyahawkes I was going to post something similar recently. MN had been reading like the equivalent of an incel chat room recently. Always backed up by those who tell us that is OK to hate a human based on the body they were born into because the statistics show they are more likely to commit crimes or assault etc.

The troubling thing for me is many of these posters are parents. They are instilling hatred into a girl or shame into a boy, its like feeding poison to an innocent mind.

But only 7% of UK women identify as feminists going by the study done by the feminist org Fawcett Society.

You mean, feminist as defined by the Fawcett Society who are going through a bizarre phase of thinking that the sex class women can include men?

I wouldn't 'identify as' a Fawcett Society-style feminist either.

“fucking hell, what a mean bunch!” And “poor men”, and eventually you recognise what they are saying in your own life
Alternatively, after 10 years or more, you feel even more for the 'poor men' and hope your sons won't fall under the claws of a MNer's descent 😁*

I dont think some mum netters see how abusive they sound in their post sometimes.
I also read and notice how so many women twist things.

And I've heard that argument so many times on here about men needing to sort their own issues out, but feminists will often actively object against things like International Men's Day
That reminds me of a not long ago thread where the poster complained that her OH dared talk about their relationship issues with his mum. The poor guy did get a beating on that thread! How dare he show a sensitive side to him, open his heart to someone he trust, a mature female voice, to seek advice! No,such men are called mummy's boys and according to MNer's, that's a very unattractive trait.

If he spoke to his male mate, that would be just as bad. So he's left to not talk to anyone. Oh wait, that's bad too because it's their fault if they don't open up!