Put your frikking babies to bed!

[Plsdiscuss]

I went for a very exclusive dinner Saturday night. I'd been looking forward to it for ages. £150 per head place, which is a huge splurge for us.

A family of 4 were seated next to us at their 7.45pm arrival. The (about) 3 yr old was 50% pacified. The (about) 9 month old in the high chair squawked for about 30 mins then fell asleep, looking very uncomfortable slumped over the side of the highchair.

If their noise wasn't bad enough, I could hear another child crying in another part of the restaurant for about an hour. That child's noise got louder as they were pushed in their pram crossing the restaurant to leave around 9pm. I commented and gestured to my partner. I wasn't as subtle as I thought in this, as the mum looked cross, waved her arm at me and mouthed fuck off.

When my now adult children were that small, they were in bed by 7.30, unless there was an event like a wedding. We got babysitters for evening meals out...very rare as very hard to get babysitters. I would never have dreamt of taking my under 5s to quiet intimate adult spots, then letting them cry for the majority. For 1, I wouldn't have enjoyed my food and 2, neither would those around me.

There's a reason deliveroo exists. Use it. And stop being so frikking selfish. Babies need sleep, not fine dining.

Agreed

It's your fault for not checking if kids are allowed sorry

i wouldn't like this either but if kids are welcome that's what happens rightly or wrongly

Children have as much right to be in a restaurant as you do. Times have changed, people enjoy spending time with their children and if they want to bring them out for dinner then why not! And bed at 7 is very early for most families

You chose to leave your dc at home, and they would settle for a babysitter. That may not be the case for everyone.

I would class 7.45 as an early dinner, and would expect dc at that time, if I wanted adult time I would probably choose a later sitting, 8.30 or 9pm.

No!

I wasn't as subtle as I thought in this, as the mum looked cross, waved her arm at me and mouthed fuck off.

Perfect response!

I’m with you OP and I have a 2&4yo. They’re not happy out that late and should be in their beds!

I think it's odd OP to take kids to a posh restaurant. I expect to see overtired kids in aToby Carvery perhaps.

Was It a ‘quiet intimate adult spot’ though? Possibly not if there were multiple children there.

I don’t think taking them is necessarily an issue (in plenty of countries it’s normal to see children in restaurants in the evening), but obviously the parents should be not letting them disturb other diners.

TBH I find adult diners are more likely to be a disruption - someone with a shrieking laugh or who is too loud, too drunk etc etc!

Your children might not be, mine don’t go to bed until 9, or later for older one, and would be fine out at that time.

Glad you got the response from the Mum that you deserved.

I went to a lovely restaurant the other day and It was no under 12 and so the adults were eating inside and the kids were sitting in chairs outside with iPads!!!! I mean come on! We were 😮

we just would not of gone there - not thought oh that's ok the kids can sit outside and wait with a bag of crisps!!! I said its like the 1970s again 😂

I probably wouldn't take my DC if they were young and likely to be tired at that time but everyone parents differently.

If you want no children, you need to go somewhere that doesn't allow children. You were extremely rude to the mother.

I agree, the kids don’t enjoy it (otherwise they wouldn’t be crying), so it’s about the adults putting themselves first. And a baby asleep late evening slumped over the high chair clearly needs to be in bed! Why do these parents spend all that money to have a stressful time with their crying kids?

Someone paid 150 quid to feed a 3 year old?! I'd tell the restaurant that charging that much and allowing kids is just not compatible. I'm not paying 150 quid for a nice meal with toddlers and babies crying.

The selfishness of some parents is mind-boggling

Yeah YABU. Clearly it was a family friendly restaurant, go somewhere else or go later if it bother you.

I wouldn't take my toddler out at that time but we definitely went as long as he was young enough to sleep in his pram. To celebrate birthdays, new year eve, or just to have f*cking break once in a while! And no, we can't afford the £60 babysitter top up!

£150 per head including wine is pretty easy to spend nowadays on dinner with wine.

£20 that is service charge.

£130 of food / drink bottle of wine can start at £60.

Might have been a special treat for OP but entirely normal for the parents of the children.

Unless it's an adult only place YABU

You're not wrong OP. I wouldn't dream of taking my 3yr old out for a late meal to a place like that. I'd be on edge

My 4 month old goes to bed at 10pm when we do and sleeps through the night until 7am. This works for us so not every baby is being put to bed at 7pm, especially when it’s nearly summer with the very light evenings lots of people make the most of the longer day light.

That being said I probably wouldn’t take my baby to a fancy restaurant but if they allow children, which they clearly did, then I don’t see the issue with it. Find one that doesn’t allow children at all if it’s an issue for you.

I'm no advocate of children should be in beð by 7. That's a ridiculous British thing that you rarely see anywhere else

The issue of children disturbing others meals is the issue. Those children should have been taken outside

I wasn't as subtle as I thought in this, as the mum looked cross, waved her arm at me and mouthed fuck off.

I raise my glass to her

YANBU Op. Babies should be in bed by that time. It's selfish of the parents to drag them out at that time. If you are paying that much per head, it's reasonable to expect to enjoy your meal in peace and quiet.

Broadly I agree, except that other kids‘ bedtime isn’t up to you, the point is more that the kids should be at home not in a restaurant. Or if they are brought then they need to be removed if they start being noisy.