Child wants to change name

[time2changeCharlieBrown]

My son is 7 and wants to change his name! Forename
hes one of two in the same class and to make matters complicated they have the same surname too! Surname is quite common but fore name is not the most popular but still relatively well known just not in any top 50 names
let’s say he’s Charlie Brown
they call them Charlie B and Charlie Brown but often they gat the same Charlie Brown it is confusing and often get items lists clubs etc mixed up
for example I’ll go collect him to find out he’s been sent to after school club even though he’s not signed up!
also I’ve received pictures and letters of the other Charlie Brown
there’s also other Charlie’s in the school

the other Charlie is also quite misbehaved and often into trouble
he broke a window and every one was talking about it, kids and parents and we had to keep on correcting
it also caused issues at beavers and cubs when signing him up as the other one is older and they said he has a space I had to point out the dob was different the child is different!

my son is now asking to be called Benjamin (the name we almost chose for him)
and he says Ben for short he knows no other Ben despite it being popular name.
he says it’s embarrassing when everyone looks at him in assembly or class especially when they are shouting Charlie Brown sit down be quiet and telling him off!

my son is quiet and reserved.

im kicking myself for not giving him a middle name on the birth certificate and we nearly used Benjamin, wish I’d have used Benjamin Charlie but alas too late! Shame certificate cannot be changed. As then he could have a choice of his name to choose. It seems wrong to change it if it can’t be officially changed.

my husband said no to change and he can be good Charlie other is naughty charlie

ive said I’m not sure as don’t see the point in changing it by deed poll as it seems pointless and complicated
but if we could change the birth certificate I probably would to Benjamin Charlie as he wants

so Aibu or (we my husband and I)
to say no to our 7 year old name change request??

(obviously names have been changed)

I wouldn't change by deed poll but as it's a name that you all like then yes go ahead and let him be known as Benjamin/Ben

Sorry but no .you could maybe say to them to call him a formal version of himself. Says Charles instead of Charlie. Billy instead of William there must be some shorter or longer version

I’m worried
it would be confusing for the others kids and teachers and seem odd to them all but I guess eventually they would get used to it?

I wouldn't change it by deed poll. It's too big a decision for a 7 year old, especially as it will have consequences for the rest of his life.

What I would do is let his use Ben, or another variation of his real name, as a known by name. So for example if it was Charlie, he could go by Lee.

Thing is it won't solve the problem. All his official paper work will be Charlie. You'll have to explain to everyone that yes he's called Charlie but he prefers Ben and there will still be people who knew him as Charlie who will get it wrong causing more confusion.

No unfortunately no the name can’t be shortened
imagine Sam as a boys name it’s a bit like that

I think you are right it would be strange .I get its annoying but sorry not at 7 when he is an adult do what he likes

How about nn cha (shay)..

It would be just as confusing and odd for everyone if he actually changed his name. Especially as lots of parents would know the reason why he's change it.

School will have to have him listed as his proper name but you can ask for him to be known as something else. For example, our Ukrainian students are known by an English version of their names which they picked themselves but on the register it says their real name.

Yeah you're going to have to explain the change to everyone

My eldeat changed her named, her grown up cousin did so my daughter decided she wanted to as well. Easier as it was nickname to full name.
We told the school, she told her friends.

Do his initials work as a nickname? Think AJ etc.

If you were to change his name I would keep Charlie as the first name and add a middle name of his choosing so he can be known as Charlie Ben etc.

If you can't shorten it, can you lengthen it? I wouldn't do a permanent change for a temporary problem. The other kid might move away. Does the school go up to y6?

If its Sam just say to school could you call him Samuel there should be a longer formal version .of whatever it is but not a complete change

First world problems. You realise in a few months this won't even be an issue to him and it will all be forgotten or looked back at with humour? It's annoying yes, but don't make it into something it really isn't. They are not the only children in the only school with exactly the same names. At 7 years old the biggest lesson he needs to take away from this is resilience, not hiding behind a different name to make the problem go away.

In those circumstances I would absolutely let him change his name in school.

I'd ask him to ask himself why he thi ks he (not the other boy) should change his name. I'd read up on how to reinforce a Sense of Self.

This sounds like a school problem more than a name problem. Would it help him if there was more distinction between him and other Charlie? I was known as "Little First name" to distinguish me from the older "Big First name" through primary (which continues to this day between our mums!). Are there nickname/shortening options? I would expect school to take this fairly seriously and make a real effort to stick to a standard format for addressing the two boys. Also, is there more than 1 class and do classes get mixed? Can one of them move classes?

I really wouldn't change anything by deed poll at his age, but would be open to tweaking his school 'known as ' name.

As a teacher, this wouldn't be confusing at all and I can see it working well. On many register systems you put 'known as' name anyway - Ellie for Eleanor etc. and I make all my own book labels and that sort of thing. Most primaries are small enough that people would quickly come to call him by the right name. The issue would perhaps be when they go up to secondary.

I'm thinking about names of people I know with short names, what would you do with Mark or John? I mean you couldn't say Marcus or Jonathan but those are different names not lengthenings. Or Jake or Kyle

I don't think theres an easy answer

This. I taught two lads called Matthew Taylor, but one of then only had one t in his first name. He left after a year in school but the other one went through the next three years known to everyone as ‘Matthew two t’s Taylor’ He loved it. Bit confusing for new staff though!

Could you add Benjamin as a middle name and then he can use it?

I'd just let him use it. You don't need to change it, just tell school he goes by Ben and get them to use it. It's incredibly common in some cultures for people to have a home/official name and one they use in the world. I've taught loads of kids who use different names.

He may want to reclaim his original name at secondary school, so don't officially change it yet. You can change it if he still wants to when there's no pressure of someone else having it.

I'd let him change his name. But I would want some answers from the school too-they seem to be handling this really badly.