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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Humiliated by John Lewis staff

578 replies

FTMaz · 01/05/2024 21:53

Hi
okay so I know this will seem very trivial to some but it is playing on my mind because I think I am a very reasonable and polite person and feel I was humiliated for absolutely no reason.

so I bought a jumper from a John Lewis store (Sweaty Beaty brand). The jumper was in the sale for £65. I wore it once and washed it according to the instructions. I put it on yesterday and my Mum commented that it had faded, the jumper is beige but I noticed it had a big white patch where the colour had seemingly ran out of it on the front. As I know John Lewis is known for their customer service I decided I would take it to the store to see if they would offer an exchange, I still had the receipt showing it had been purchased recently.

I went to the womenswear till but the queue was massive (I had my 12 week old baby with me) so I went to a till near the shoes. The girl serving must have been about 17/18. I explained to her what had happened and said I wasn’t sure if I could swap it but thought it was worth an ask. The girl was very polite but said she needed to check with a colleague, fine not a problem. She returned with a colleague who didn’t even acknowledge me. At this point there was a now a queue at the till. They both turned away from me and girl number 2 started whispering and inspecting the jumper. This probably went on for about 10 minutes. Girl number 1 then turned back to me and said something to the effect of I’m really sorry but I need to check with a manager…I assumed girl 2 was a manager but again I said okay. She then called someone on the phone. I continued to wait and at this point my baby started to cry, girl number 1 obviously feeling uncomfortable called again and apologised, again fine as not her fault that baby is crying or that manager is taking a long time. So eventually the manager turns up and calls me ‘sweetheart’ okay a term of endearment but I am a 34 year old professional so odd of her to do. Anyway…she inspects the jumper and says she can’t see the white patch, I said to her I couldn’t either until I went into natural light and my Mum pointed it out. At this point I am starting to feel agitated and embarrassed as there is a queue, my baby is crying and I am basically being told I’m making things up so I say ‘don’t worry about it for the sake of £60 I’ll just have the jumper back,’ she then says to go with her outside the store to natural light to show her the patch…seriously? I reply no it’s fine I’m not dragging my baby outside I’ll just have the jumper back. Again she insists I go outside with her and I again say it’s fine I’ll have the jumper back. She then turns to girl number 1 and says ‘you’ll come with me outside to look won’t you’ so they both then walk off and leave me at the till with my now screaming baby. Sometime later they return with ANOTHER member of staff, so now 4 people have looked at this bloody jumper! The manager says they all agree there is nothing wrong with it. Now I am quite frankly pissed off and humiliated and say ‘ I told you I would take the jumper back but instead I have been standing here whilst 4 people inspect it, I didn’t demand a refund I simply asked if it was possible to do anything such as an exchange.’ She replies there’s nothing wrong with it. So I say (probably wrongly so but I’d had enough) ‘if you go on my account you will see how much money I spend in this store, do you seriously think I would make things up to get back £60?’ She replies again there is nothing wrong with it.

for context I worked in retail for years both before starting university, during and after (the irony is I actually also worked in that John Lewis 😂) I get that it can sometimes be shit and people are rude but I was honestly lovely and feel I was humiliated and spoken to like an idiot.

However I am also overly tired from the sleepless nights….so AIBU to wait to complain to the store?

OP posts:
Nubnut · 03/05/2024 21:31

Honestly, your baby is three months old, you can go shopping etc in a few months time, just focus on having a calm, nice daily life. Is my advice.

Bumblingbee101 · 03/05/2024 22:08

This sounds ridiculous 🙄 poor you OP. I would contact their customer services to explain. Your poor baby.

Hollysberries · 04/05/2024 07:13

Maybe your Mum needs a trip to Specsavers.

No one else but her could see the mark.

You don't sound too sure yourself that it was there anyway.

And the store staff could have taken it to the window without you going with them. If the mark was that obvious, they would have seen it.

If you used to work in retail, you'd appreciate that telling the staff how much you spend in J Lewis would make you sound just awful.

They were bending over backwards to try to help you but what comes over is that you weren't happy to be challenged, lost your temper, and were shocked that they queried the mark.

StarlightLime · 04/05/2024 09:12

Bumblingbee101 · 03/05/2024 22:08

This sounds ridiculous 🙄 poor you OP. I would contact their customer services to explain. Your poor baby.

Poor baby??

Motheroffourdragons · 04/05/2024 09:49

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on behalf of the poster.

Lambriniwages · 04/05/2024 10:22

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on behalf of the poster.

Wow are you ok Hun lol

Well if I was trying to get a refund and my baby became upset only for a member of staff to say let's go outside and look at the mark etc I wouldn't be happy at all

Tbh I'm over this thread I'm going to enjoy my bank holiday lol

StarlightLime · 04/05/2024 10:25

Lambriniwages · 04/05/2024 10:22

Wow are you ok Hun lol

Well if I was trying to get a refund and my baby became upset only for a member of staff to say let's go outside and look at the mark etc I wouldn't be happy at all

Tbh I'm over this thread I'm going to enjoy my bank holiday lol

Your baby would still be irrelevant as to whether you were entitled to a refund or not.

Hun.

Lambriniwages · 04/05/2024 10:25

StarlightLime · 04/05/2024 10:25

Your baby would still be irrelevant as to whether you were entitled to a refund or not.

Hun.

Ok Hun 😂

Lambriniwages · 04/05/2024 10:27

Lambriniwages · 04/05/2024 10:25

Ok Hun 😂

Can't see where I said she should get a refund because of her baby what a strange reply

Motheroffourdragons · 04/05/2024 11:10

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on behalf of the poster.

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 12:07

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on behalf of the poster.

Yes what I do is make up scenarios THEN I make sure my baby is as wound up as possible to go to the store, make them cry on queue all so I can get a refund 😂

seriously there are some strange people on Mumsnet.

so far

  1. ive made the whole thing up
  2. I made up I work in education
  3. I made up I worked in retail
  4. I made up the white mark
  5. People should wear sweatshirts in the first place
  6. people shouldn’t buy from a brand called sweaty Betty
  7. I made it up because sweaty betty don’t make a beige jumper (probably the weirdest reply)

if it appeased anyone I just bought myself a new sweatshirt….please hate me even more because I can afford to clothe myself 😂

as PP states I am SO over this.

OP posts:
Dogsaregods · 04/05/2024 12:20

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 12:07

Yes what I do is make up scenarios THEN I make sure my baby is as wound up as possible to go to the store, make them cry on queue all so I can get a refund 😂

seriously there are some strange people on Mumsnet.

so far

  1. ive made the whole thing up
  2. I made up I work in education
  3. I made up I worked in retail
  4. I made up the white mark
  5. People should wear sweatshirts in the first place
  6. people shouldn’t buy from a brand called sweaty Betty
  7. I made it up because sweaty betty don’t make a beige jumper (probably the weirdest reply)

if it appeased anyone I just bought myself a new sweatshirt….please hate me even more because I can afford to clothe myself 😂

as PP states I am SO over this.

What a ridiculous over reaction.

thepastinsidethepresent · 04/05/2024 13:12

What a ridiculous over reaction.

I dunno. OP's had some pretty ridiculous responses on this thread, I think I'd be fed up too at this point.

PeppaPigIsQAnon · 04/05/2024 13:46

Dogsaregods · 04/05/2024 12:20

What a ridiculous over reaction.

I mean, not really. People have been batshit on here and said all those things 🤣

RobBeckettsGiantTeeth · 04/05/2024 16:01

It's cry on cue. Not queue.

Why didn't you just take your baby elsewhere to calm it down?

ironedcurtain · 04/05/2024 16:19

Dogsaregods · 04/05/2024 12:20

What a ridiculous over reaction.

It's actually quite a factual restatement of the thread lol

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 17:22

RobBeckettsGiantTeeth · 04/05/2024 16:01

It's cry on cue. Not queue.

Why didn't you just take your baby elsewhere to calm it down?

‘It’ dear God I hope you don’t have kids, which makes the amount of time you spend on Mumsnet even weirder.

OP posts:
Burpie · 04/05/2024 18:02

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 17:22

‘It’ dear God I hope you don’t have kids, which makes the amount of time you spend on Mumsnet even weirder.

The it is your grammar not your baby

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 18:05

Burpie · 04/05/2024 18:02

The it is your grammar not your baby

Can you read? They said to ‘calm it down’ in reference to the baby. Also it’s not a grammar error it’s a spelling mistake…different things.

OP posts:
RobBeckettsGiantTeeth · 04/05/2024 18:57

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 18:05

Can you read? They said to ‘calm it down’ in reference to the baby. Also it’s not a grammar error it’s a spelling mistake…different things.

What are we meant to say in the absence of knowing the sex of your baby? Repeatedly type "him/her" or "the baby"? That's laborious and unnecessary. "It" is a pronoun, nothing more nothing less.

The point I am trying to make is that you played the "but I have a baaaaaaaaby" card and that's not acceptable. If the baby is crying, take the baby (there, is that better?!) elsewhere to calm the baby (again) down so you can deal with the errand at hand. Had you done that, you would have been able to do what the staff required of you, but you chose to make a big deal out of it instead then complain that they "humiliated" you. Very tiring behaviour, like when women blame their hormones for their behaviour.

And it's not a spelling error, it's using completely the wrong word. The phrase is "on cue", not "on queue". A queue is what you wait in at the till.

Growlybear83 · 04/05/2024 19:02

OP, why did you start a thread in AIBU to ask people's views when you clearly think you weren't being unreasonable? You have been quite aggressive in some of your responses to comments that other posters have made and don't seem willing to listen to what many people have said.

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 19:11

Growlybear83 · 04/05/2024 19:02

OP, why did you start a thread in AIBU to ask people's views when you clearly think you weren't being unreasonable? You have been quite aggressive in some of your responses to comments that other posters have made and don't seem willing to listen to what many people have said.

Hi
you would need to read the whole thread to see what’s happened and unless you want to be bored to death I suggest you don’t 😂. Lots of people have given their view in a really polite and helpful way, and I have responded to these in kind. However others have used this thread to just be nasty and have a go, so I have responded appropriately to them. You probably haven’t seen but I’ve been accused of all sorts of weird things!

OP posts:
Burpie · 04/05/2024 19:23

FTMaz · 04/05/2024 18:05

Can you read? They said to ‘calm it down’ in reference to the baby. Also it’s not a grammar error it’s a spelling mistake…different things.

You quoted "it's cue...not queue", nothing to do with calming anyone down

Growlybear83 · 04/05/2024 19:29

@FTMaz I have read the whole thread, every post, which is why I asked why you had started this in AIBU when you don't seem to be prepared to accept that many people think you were being unreasonable.

StarlightLime · 04/05/2024 19:32

We've all read the full thread, op. You're still unreasonable.