To think this wasn’t a joke

[FogChill]

And was actually quite a nasty comment?

I have just turned 40 and I was discussing with my partner that I am likely to start menopause in the next few years. My DM had terrible hot flashes and I said to him that he’s got all of this (sharing a bed with a heater) to look forward to. He immediately said - no way - I’ll just trade you in for a younger model who’s still able to get wet.

I’m absolutely upset that he has said this to me. I can’t believe that he thought this to begin with let alone said it. He’s now furiously backpedaling saying that it was a joke and that I need to get over it.

AIBU to be upset? I really don’t think I am.

He's got preconceptions about menopausal women.

I suggest you take HRT and get rampant with someone else.

I'd just laugh and say .. don't worry I'll be on HRT and that's well know for giving high libido.. so I'll be trading you in for a younger model who will beable to keep up with me.

Joke or not, he sounds gross!

The get wet part. What a fucking toe rag 🤬

Less of the animal slurs. Pigs don't behave like pieces of shit

Less of the animal slurs. Pigs don't behave like pieces of shit

Less of the animal slurs. Pigs don't behave like pieces of shit

Time to start taking the piss about his baldness then @FogChill Because it’s just a joke, right?

Why is he being so stupid and cruel?

I'd be taking the piss with his next ED non performance. Fucking grim bastard

It's a really disgusting thing to say. While it's possible he misjudged and went to far, the response of a loving partner would be to apologise sincerely and deeply for the hurt caused. A joke is only a joke if the person it's aimed at thinks its funny, otherwise you're just being nasty. He's made it even worse by not owning what he's done and doubling down on it to make out he's the victim. He should care that he's hurt you and want to fix that more than he wants to be right or whatever idiotic reason is behind him not owning his behaviour and apologising.

ew. He’s gross. No one’s getting wet for a man like that. He’s repulsive

You know what, you are absolutely right. Fair point.

Erm yes by human standards, of course they do.

Male pigs will sniff out the reproductive females and force them to mate. It’s not their fault because they lack emotional intelligence.No one’s being “mean” to the cute piggies, it’s just a fact.

It’s rather apt to call a man who behaves similarly a chauvinist pig.

I’m not sure you can be sanctimonious about “animal slurs” when you go as “QueenBitch” 😉

I’d wait for the next time he can’t get an erection, then sigh and say “I got wet for THIS?”

Agree! When the time comes, go on HRT and find yourself a younger model.

That's just what I thought, the 'wet' bit is so crude. I would not accept such a joke from my husband, to be honest I cannot imagine a husband talking, or even thinking, about that.

Op, you probably have a good few years before perimenopause and what I wish for you is that, when it happens, it is fairly easy. It's not a big deal for all of us.

Sort your man out! He needs telling.

Now ask him how he would feel if you had replied "what am I getting wet for when you can't get it up anyway?"

As others have said, the trading in part is old school humour (not hilarious but meant as a joke) the other part crossed the line and was grim....

Only you know what your husband is really like.

Not all men like talking about things like periods and menopause.

It wasn't really a mature approach to a conversation if launching into drama about hot flushes and "sleeping with a heater".

And you didn't get a mature response.

And now you're sulking and one of the "perpetually offended".

Not really sure what you wanted out of the conversation with your husband. But when you work it out, sit down and have a mature discussion about it.

should have come back with something like ‘that’s ok I’ll trade you in for someone who can actually get me wet..’

This 👆

He obviously has no idea how upsetting and potentially painful vaginal dryness is. I don't think I could bear him near me after his comment.

Tell him you might already have traded him in for a younger model who can get a decent stiffy.

Time to demonstrate that hurt by doing so!

If you're not "wet" enough that's his fault not yours lol 😆