Re my parents and childcare

[Theroadnottravelled]

I think I’m going to get blasted for this but my lovely parents are being frustrating imo. Me and DH moved from London to the south coast to be near them. We have 2 girls, 2 and 4. Both in nursery 4 days a week as we both work FT. My parents do a day for us, have done for a year. They offered and I’d never expect more. I am grateful. My dad has now said it’s too tiring for them to do all day so will do half. So we have no cover and can’t really afford more nursery. We get by but I felt that as there are two of them, almost 70 but very fit, play golf most weeks and are very active that it’s disappointing they won’t do the whole day once a week plus DD1 goes to school in sept.

This.

Me and DH moved from London to the south coast to be near them

Does this help?

My parents did offer the day, before we moved, yes

They aren't backtracking. They did the child care for a YEAR now they can't

It does tell you who thanked you

Op, you need to find other childcare arrangements for the one day that your parents provide.
Could you and your spouse each work more hours on the other four days, every second week? (so one of you is there for the kids as normal for four days) Effectively taking turns to take the fifth day off.
Ask your parents if they would be willing to be emergency child carers sometimes, or maybe one half or full day per fortnight or month.
They are being honest and they sound like they still will help you out and enjoy seeing your children.

Buy a clue, seriously.

Mine doesn't, it simply informs me that the post was thanked - unless I am missing something?

I think many grandparents think they can manage it but forget the reality of looking after small children.
Im guessing that’s what’s happened with your parents.
Its lovely that they wanted to but have realised they are just not as capable as they were when they had you.
I hope you find a solution and this doesn’t create a wedge between you.

It’s hard accepting that our parents are getting old and can’t do all that they used to do. Todays 70 year olds may look and behave younger than our grandparents did at the same age, but 70 is still old. My 70 year old mother and mother in law both fully enjoy their retirements, and regularly go to the pub, to book clubs, for long walks with friends, play tennis etc but a whole day with the grandchildren absolutely wipes them out. And they are shattered the next day! There is no way that they could do it every week, despite the fact that they do love the grandchildren. Just a few years ago they were much more capable, but I see them now struggle to get up from the floor when they have been playing with the kids, and they can’t walk as far or as fast.

@KeinLiebeslied54321
i don’t know if you’ve spotted how to see who thanked you yet but if you see a small number above the clapping hands just click on the clapping hands and a name will appear. I’ll thNk your last post now and you can try it.
Not sure if it’s the same for all devices, I’m on an iPad

"So they got OP to move"

I take my hat off to OP for being offered childcare and by the following day she had found a house, sold her house, all of the legalities taken care of, a removals firm booked, all moved and chilling with a glass of wine within 24 hours. Absolutely incredible.

If you click on the hand under the post that has been thanked you will see the names of people who have thanked you. (I've thanked your post so you can try it out :) )

Ah right, it's that easy.
Thanks for pointing out to me in a kind way (unlike some folk).
Edit - thank you @patchworkpal too.

I wonder OP, did you know your grandparents? I never knew mine and I've learned about aging parents from watching my friends with their parents. Most of them have parents that are a bit older than mine. Things can change with health and ability to do things very quickly at that age. Mine are 70 and it's the stage I would be starting to do things for them if they lived closer. I think my parents are in much better shape than most their age too. The reason I'm asking if you knew your grandparents, or have much experience with older people in general, is that maybe you didn't understand that an offer of childcare or anything at all from a person that age is not secure. It's not anyway, but especially at that age. A lot can change in a year since they started caring for your child. In the past year my mother has lost the ability to drive suddenly, for example.

The OP says she chose to move ‘to be close to her family’ - she does not say because they asked her, or that they moved in exchange for promised childcare - this was offered, apparently, after they moved.

The OP's parents offered a day of childcare per week before she moved to be closer to them.

The parents have been taking OP's dc for that one day a week.

The 'day before she moved' narrative has been invented by echt and others makes zero sense.

It's probably just time to "find another thread" like you've been telling others to do 💤

this was offered, apparently, after they moved.

Or in fact before.

But your highlighted section means they offered the day - before OP moved. Not they offered it on the day before the removal van arrived.