Nursery keep spelling child’s name wrong

[QueryAutism]

Child has a name that has multiple legitimate spellings, at least 4 that I can think of, but it’s a name that’s popular across Europe and tends to be spelt slightly differently in each country. We have used the second most common UK variant, which is only slightly less commonly used than the most common variant.

It’s spelt wrong all the time by family, friends and strangers. Fine, a tad annoying when it’s family or close friends but whatever.

Nursery persistently spell his name wrong. I’ve told them this multiple times. It was spelt wrong on his peg and I had to tell them 3 times before they finally changed the label. It’s spelt wrong on his drawings. Then today we had an assessment report from them and it was spelt wrong throughout. He’s been going there for almost 2 years.

Aren’t they supposed to be the ones helping him to learn to recognise and write his name? Surely it’s going to confuse him seeing it spelt wrong all the time.

I think I’m going to send a polite but strongly worded email in response to the progress report. Surely his key worker should be able to spell his name at the very least? Am I being unreasonable?

They probably found the Rebecca spelling came with its own variants too, Rebeca,Rebbecca. Rebbeca,Rebeccer……….. sighs heavily.

When my son started nursery everyone was like what’s the spelling, what’s the spelling. I thought they were barmy as this kind of thing doesn’t bother me. But actually as they moved up classes I see now that at nursery they do have their names on bloody everything so it probably does matter.

Well that's what you when you choose an unusual name unfortunately

It's down to your choice not others that can't spell it

Ha, if only it just happened with unusual spellings! 😂

You could have both changed your names to something else.

Primary did something like this to my child.

Instead of misspelling their name, they would send letters with her cousins name in by mistake who used to attend the school. I think they were using a template saved by surname maybe?

Several face to face conversations didn't work, so in the end I would send back whatever it was with a note asking who X was?

This happens if you have a child called Johnny to be fair - Johnny, Johnnie, Jonny, Jonnie, Johny…

Not really. The first spelling is the traditional way.

People are lazy and thoughtless. Sometime I have signed my name in an email and the person responding has written it with the wrong first letter. Think Jerry and Gerry. It isn't rocket science when it is there before you.

Only if it is a diminutive for John. It would be an illogical spelling as a diminutive for Jonathan, hence Jonny / Jonnie.

I have noticed over the last 4.5 years of using a nursery (two children with two years apart in age) that the staff don’t have great written communication skills, including spelling, punctuation or grammar. But as this isn’t a prerequisite of providing good care to my children I let it slide right over my head.

Do the staff engage with your child, provide good care and is your child happy to attend?

Is it? My FIL was always Johnnie and he was born more than 100 years ago.

I would say Jon is a fairly recent diminutive for Jonathan as years ago anyone named Jonathan used John. I have never known anyone refer to themselves as Jonny.

My daughters name has 2 spellings and as long as it's spelt most of the time with the correct spelling I don't fret too much. Having her name spelt correctly on her peg would be a deal breaker.
In one of her reports from nursery we had one paragraph when she turned into a completely different child! We just laughed!
I had a 5 letter name that was very common. It has 2 spellings and I still got lots of different spellings. I worked in a restaurant where it was never spelt on the rota the same way twice

I discovered at 25 that my dad spelt my middle name incorrectly on my birth certificate!

John and Jonathan are totally separate names with different Biblical sources. The diminutive of Jonathan is Jon, not John.

Yes sorry I meant 2nd spelling, Johnnie. Female names used to end with a y and male ie (Lesley, Leslie). I do realise all the "rules" are now out of the window which is why it's much more difficult now and you have to ask.

I know they are separate names. I'm just pointing out that when I was growing up Jonathans always used John. I am very old though.

My maiden name had 6 possible correct spellings and no one ever got it right. Every certificate through school was spelt wrong. I was relieved to get married and now have an easy to spell name with only one spelling. My first name had two common variants, mine is by far the most commonly used and people still get it wrong.

My name (as pronounced) is actually only spelt one way, although there are variations on the theme in terms of pronunciation (think Georgia / Georgina). Doesn’t stop people spelling (and pronouncing) it the male way, and also one of the the alternate version ways.

My surname, on the face of it, is very straightforward, has one correct spelling, is English in origin, and gets absolutely butchered in spelling and pronunciation. The result is, I end up getting called things which bear very little resemblance with my full name…I do correct people though. It’s amazing how little they care though!

Yep it's irritating.

DD is 17 now but when they were younger, nursery, infants school and two primaries spelt it wrong constantly. Their name can be ie at the end, or y. We even had someone spell the start with a letter that it's never spelt with, probably down to the bloody Kardashians.

Now? Doesn't happen, they're at 6th now and shortened their name when they registered. Also, no one in the family including us calls them the name and hasn't in years because they have a nickname that has stuck.

You will ask and ask, but I wouldn't waste your breath. It's not done to be offensive, they just have so many kids and so few staff it happens.

Teach your DS his name and spelling at home, then he can point it out. It will come in handy for adulthood! My name has three different spellings, it's always spelt wrong.

Oh goodness I have to correct people on how to SAY ds's name.

If it was one or two instances I’d leave it but the fact it’s the wrong spelling on everything, for two years, would make me want to bring it up quite sternly. Both my names are misspelled or mispronounced frequently and most of the time it doesn’t matter but if I was trying to learn my own name I’d be pretty confused! Is the nursery generally good in other areas? Because they sound a bit lax if they don’t care about this simple thing.

How have friends and family got away with spelling the name wrong for years? Do you correct them?

My mum wrote my auntie’s name wrong in cards for years until I noticed and corrected her. My auntie was very sweet and never said anything but because of that the misspelling had just carried on and on

I would email asking for YOUR child’s assessment as they have sent the wrong one and perhaps ask if they had sent yours to someone else as they obviously have the children muddled up

Don’t do this either! Why do so many MNers make such passive-aggressive suggestions for perfectly straightforward communication?

It used to drive DS (16) mad at school. He has an Italian name (DH dad was Italian and we have an Italian surname). It’s 4 letters! Pretty easy to spell but school would insist on changing a letter or adding a letter to more English names. Even as young as 5 DS would have no problem correcting them!