Nursery keep spelling child’s name wrong

[QueryAutism]

Child has a name that has multiple legitimate spellings, at least 4 that I can think of, but it’s a name that’s popular across Europe and tends to be spelt slightly differently in each country. We have used the second most common UK variant, which is only slightly less commonly used than the most common variant.

It’s spelt wrong all the time by family, friends and strangers. Fine, a tad annoying when it’s family or close friends but whatever.

Nursery persistently spell his name wrong. I’ve told them this multiple times. It was spelt wrong on his peg and I had to tell them 3 times before they finally changed the label. It’s spelt wrong on his drawings. Then today we had an assessment report from them and it was spelt wrong throughout. He’s been going there for almost 2 years.

Aren’t they supposed to be the ones helping him to learn to recognise and write his name? Surely it’s going to confuse him seeing it spelt wrong all the time.

I think I’m going to send a polite but strongly worded email in response to the progress report. Surely his key worker should be able to spell his name at the very least? Am I being unreasonable?

Would you really do this to people you are leaving your child with? Grow up.

Could your Dcs key worker have dyslexia?
I would once again speak to her directly, point out that your Dcs name has been spelled incorrectly throughout her report, and get her to write down the correct spelling. It’s annoying, but it’s not the end of the world. I currently teach in a school and in the 3 classes I cover there are 6 boys with the same name, all spelled differently! Every time I mark their books or need to write their names I have to check the spelling.

I have an 8 year old son whose name is spelt wrong all the time. It’s a legitimate spelling, just not the ‘usual’ one, but it’s always assumed to be the more standard one so that’s what people use.

It drives me insane!

Last year he was part of a cricket tournament and despite being part of the team for over 2 years his medal still had the incorrect spelling of his name on it.

Sometimes I wish I had a Time Machine so I could go back in time to his birth and call him something else 😂

🙄

And yet your user name is spelled with a ‘y’?

Yes extremely annoying OP. Be prepared for a life of this unfortunately.

I have a variant spelling of a name used in the UK. To be fair it is a foreign spelling so I accept people will get it wrong if giving my name verbally. However it really totally fucks me off when people misspell it when it's been spelt correctly for them eg in an email etc. where I've signed off with the correct spelling, the correct spelling is part of the email address and they still can't work it out. See also invitations arriving spelt wrong when they've asked me or DH for the correct spelling.

Or even worse when they pronounce it with the wrong starting letter directly after you've introduced yourself. Idiots.

Ever had it with the ‘er’? Samanther 😂

Seen that quite a bit.

OP, I have the same. My kid has a popular name with multiple spellings. Even some Mum friends get it wrong, although they always ask me the ‘correct’ way. Nursery sometimes used to get it wrong, her school get it right!

They need to sort it as nursery is where they learn to recognise and even write their own name. I have daughter with a name with many different spellings her nursery never got it wrong.

My child has a Scottish name with multiple spellings. We chose the most popular one (though not strictly correct Gaelic).

We kind of take it if someone spells or says it wrong because we chose a more unusual name-though still quite popular. Every day when I get him from nursery there is a list of what they have had for lunches and they spell it different every time.

I have been surprised at the people in my life who have spelt it wrongly consistently and I do take note of the people who always make the effort to check it and spell it properly. That being said I never use his name as a password as its a nightmare to type out quickly 😂

A mum of one of the kids I taught, taught her pre 5 yr old child to verbally spell his name for teachers because it was unusual. Bet she'd had problems with it in nursery/ relatives.

Yes, anything slightly out of the ordinary sends them into a tail spin! Good luck to you and Ieuan for keeping enwau Cymraeg going. (I have a Siân and a Rhidian - not easily spelled here in the frozen north).

This happens all the time. I have to call children from waiting areas & it's a minefield. I'm always checking I've pronounced things correctly, but it is difficult! I've had a Mia pronounced My-ah which did throw me. And lots of African/Asian/Polish/Irish names that I've never seen before so I just try my best & tbh I've been known to Google the pronunciation to try & make sure I'm not saying them wrong! But if I'm writing them down I ALWAYS check. It's a lack of care that people don't I think! It's one of the reasons I gave my own child a name that's said as it's spelled. Easy but still nice!

I have the slightly less common version of a name with two spellings, and have had this all my life.

It can be irritating (it is careless at best, disrespectful at worst), but I’d say pick your battles. Most of DP’s family spell my name wrong, which I shrug off, for various reasons. But I’m now doing some voluntary work where details are crucial, and it’s happening there. I’ll be fucked if I’ll put up with it from them, and I’ll correct it every single time. Nurseries and schools should absolutely be getting their children’s’ names right.

They need to get it right, learning to recognise your name is a basic part of the EYFS.

It’s both rude and pretty stupid of the staff. How hard can it be? Really? I’d take a look at the EYFS framework and highlight all the parts of that they aren’t meeting by continuing to disregard his name. Might make them think!

There were 7 girls called Rebecca, in my year. Becky, Beccy, Becki, Becci, Beckie, Bekki, and Beccie. I'm really not joking. How are people expected to remember which one is which?

My cousin Becky went to live in New Zealand and now she is called “Bicky”!

I used to work with a chap called Martyn. What on earth were his parents thinking? He had to say “no, Martin with a y” all through his life!

Ridiculous, passive aggressive suggestion. I hope you’re joking. What a way to live your life.

How did you get on when you raised it with the nursery @QueryAutism?

DS is in year 11 and still none of the teachers throughout his entire school career have managed to spell his surname correctly. Even when physically in front of someone and I spell it out, they will still get the two letters in question the wrong way round 😖

I think you're being precious, OP.

As someone with a very normal, short name that has a couple of spellings, I've had 50 years of misspellings and honestly, it matters literally nought!

I think pronunciation is way more important than spelling.

Some people on this thread miss the point that this is at nursery.
Where children learn to recognise and write their name
That's surely the most significant point here

My cousin Becky went to live in New Zealand and now she is called “Bicky”!

This is sarcasm, right?

I'm guessing Mohammed or one it's many variants.

I use my full name - e.g. Elizabeth. That's my name, it's who I am. If I introduce myself to someone and they immediately call me Lizzie, I tell them politely but firmly that that my name is Elizabeth. One person replied, "Oh, well I know another Elizabeth who's called Lizzie." Maybe so, but I'm not her. By that reasoning, I know a Susan, so should I call every female Susan?
Names are important and we should respect that, whatever age people are.

I once worked in a school where there was a pair of twins of Bengali heritage in reception. They had unusual names ,think something like Polly and Dolly, names that were on the register, their books, that they used for each other, answered to etc. Until the day one of their teachers asked Mum about the names, turns out mum and the babies had spent some time in hospital after a complicated delivery and the midwives/ nurses had given the girls the Polly/Dolly names, and written them on their wrist tags/ cots because their Bengali names were “too hard” to pronounce and remember. When they started school nursery Mum had assumed that all English people in authority were equally as rude/entitled/ ignorant so had given the Polly/Dolly names for school, “But we use their proper names at home” . From that day on Amina and Ameera used their proper names at school too.

Names have been changed (again) for privacy reasons.