To be annoyed he cancelled and lied.

[namechangingforthis100]

Had a date planned with a guy from online dating.

Day comes and I ask him what time as we hadn't set that. He tells me he had to go away and it was impromptu, apologised and we can reschedule when he's back.

I decided to check his online profile. This particular dating site tells you what area user was in when he was last online.

His showed he was in Belgium. Flitting between 2 different towns over there.
We messaged back and forth and his location was still showing Belgium.

Monday comes and he asks how my weekend was and I ask him where he went off to. He tells me he had to go to the Lakes for a couple of days. Blatant lie. Not a stalker but I did keep checking the location as something seems a bit off. If he had to go away could he not have told me this a day or 2 before?

Where have I said I haven't met him?
I have. We've been on 3 dates.

You said that absolutely nowhere in your first post.

I interpreted your op as not met yet so apologies if i got that wrong too but i still think it's stalkerish checking his location

I have mentioned it in the posts since because a few people mentioned that. and where did I say I have never met him???

Hmmm I'd probably give him another chance if you clicked well when you met and you want to see him again. But I am far too nosy and curious and would have to ask about the lying thing which may put him right off

Run for the hills! With OLD it's about quantity with first dates. Go on as many dates as you can (safely, obviously). Be brutal in culling the ones you're not keen on and be utterly unemotional at the very many who ghost you. I used to have a spreadsheet lol.

If you’re certain he lied then I wouldn’t see him again.

Why are you even bothering with him? I can't believe you checked up on his location!

I think it's more likely the technology has got it wrong somehow (vpn?). Why would he lie about being in Belgium?

But, he let you down without telling you his pans had changed, and you're feeling the need to check up on him this early on. Walk away.

I hope he runs.
If you are tracking him like this after just 3 dates…
do you seriously not see this is quite disturbing behaviour?

This

Baby Reindeer

If he uses a VPN it will obscure his location.

If he cancelled last minute I am afraid he is not interested. He has done you a favour in showing you who he is relatively early on.

I kinda sympathise OP, as someone who can get too emotionally invested in…everything. But he’s done you a favour really, don’t waste any more time on him if he keeps being flakey and cancelling. The VPN thing could be right but it’s immaterial.

The right guy will be just as enthusiastic as you are, don’t settle for less.

He's probably seeing other people too and got a better offer. I too think you're weird for tracking him. Too early on to be getting so invested.

Never mind that he might've lied about his location (although I do agree with others that you can't rely on the internet to show where he is - my Facebook often shows my phone as logged in hundreds of miles away), the fact that he can't keep you abreast when he knows in advance that he can't make a date that you've arranged shows a complete disregard for your time. He's either incapable of considering others, or you're just not that important.
Let this one go.

Yabu. The dates probably didn’t go as well for him as you, you’re on the back burner. You do sound a bit stalkery.
I would just not bother chasing this one op.

Just move on. You’re being obsessive and stalkery and he’s being flaky. Neither of you like each other enough

I think it's weird that the app shows you location anyway. I know it's not a pinpoint locator but still, I think that's a bit off. If I was on a site like that I'd consider using a VPN for that reason alone.

Well you already sounds nuts so I'm thinking he got away good 😂

Online dating is a bloody nightmare and I was on a few proper dating sites for a while and met a few head fucks online and in person including one from Belgium! 🤣

I then just decided to use one called I think Thursday or something like that and Happn. I connected with a few guys on the Thursday app but got frustrated as you can only use it on Thursdays but on Happn I much more prefer it because it’s supposed to tell you where you bump into men or women. I’ve had a few dates and a relationship of a year from then.

This man isn’t for you OP but internet dating and the dating apps can send you mad. I have also met men when out in pubs and bars preferably with music or an old fashioned cheesy disco with a DJ. One friend of mine met her now DH on Plenty of Fish.

I just want to add this isn't the first time he's cancelled. More like the 3rd, that's why I decided to check

this..it reads like he has cancelled on you 3 times

More likely he is using a VPN (and good thing too!)

She's purely fact checking as acting on her intuition. You can tell you're a misogynist male. 🙄