To think alot of women don't have their 'girl gang'?

[SlB09]

Doom scrolling through social media, got me thinking, do most women have a 'girl gang'? Or is this saved for those who remained in the place they grew up/got lucky/other reasons or dissipates as you get older?

I have I handful of close women friends I've made along the way, none remain from school. But they are separate friends so to speak, no 'girl gang' and I think I only know one or two other females who have this type of friendship group (I'm 40). Sometimes wish I had it and other times happy as I am.

What are your experiences?

I get what you mean and no I don't have that either. Friends that seem to live in each others pockets. I have my best friend who I've known for about 13 years but even we're not super close.
I have mum friends from the children's school, we socialise occasionally but certainly not as close as a couple of years ago, we've drifted apart, still polite and have long chats at the school gates but it's not really the same.
I do get lonely sometimes but it's OK, I get by.

I certainly don't. When I was younger I felt so awkward trying to fit in with the Prosecco/squealing/clubbing in high heels that a lot of women I knew enjoyed. It just wasn't me.

Now I'm in my mid 40s and pretty fucking lonely tbh. The few women I am friends with are always busy with family commitments at weekends.

Same as @EvenStillIWantTo here!

I have a group of university friends and sometimes just the women get together for weekends away.

Quite a lot of my female friends know each other from my industry, so we might go out in a small groups, but not constantly.

So not really.

I think you are right if your main / only friendship group is what you call a girl gang you probably haven’t moved far from where you grew up.

I do but we are scattered around the country and only meet once a year. We WhatsApp every day.

No not really. I have a few friends not in a group and also a group of lovely ladies I meet for coffee once a month (met them through a more long standing friend but we are not a “gang”.

I don't have this either, but I don't think I'd like it. I find social situations very difficult in big groups. Hen nights are my idea of hell.
I see some schoolfriends on fb who go for weekends with their mates, and they look so happy and contented and I'm glad for them! But it's very far from my reality, and far from what I'd be comfortable with.

No girl gang here.

Hated it at school so haven’t kept in touch.

I have several wonderful female friends now from different areas of my life, but no gang.

Not my cup of tea. Couple of good friends I see occasionally. That’s enough for me.

I have different pockets of friends - some from school, work, uni and post uni, we're all very close but don't do things that often as we're all at different stages in our lives. I like that though. Makes it a special occasion when we do get together.

I looked at joining my local Lonely Girls Club but everyone except me seemed to be there with existing friends. I just want to find other women with similar interests to me, ones that are open to accepting people with eg different (GC) viewpoints to them, intellectually curious and not ready to go quietly!

No. Because I am not Taylor Swift.

I have my random weird mate who I don't speak to for months and then we talk again like we've never been apart. But it's usually to share memes not drinking Prosecco. Does that count?

This might be a little off topic, but to be honest, I hate the 'best friend' thing, especially when peddled to children. Like the 'girl gang ' thing, I think most people don't really have it and those that do have either never really moved far from home or aren't that close anyway.

I think it's just a social media thing. Most people I know socialise with different people according to occasion. Some know more people then others. Some prefer to socialise through work, others the opposite.

All these things like 'girl gang'/ 'best friend' are just terms that make people feel like they are missing out 🤷‍♀️

We moved a lot (military family) and I only see a couple of uni friends. I do have a gang who I met in my late 20s, 20 years ago. I also have other small groups and individuals I’ve met along the way. I would love a ‘best mate’ but other than DH I don’t really have one. I am envious of people who an old group of friends they still meet up with. I would love to have this. We

Some do, some don’t. Girl gangs work well at some stages of life, less so at others.

They are harder to manage when people’s lifestyles change ie some have had children and others have not.

I think they are quite overrated tbh and often the group obscures some problematic dynamics. Inevitably not everyone in the group will like everyone equally and there are always going to be frictions and internal differences which are harder to resolve. Over time most tend to splinter into smaller groups.

I do but they don't live close.

I think its important to not out all your eggs in one basket... I have a few friends groups, males and females for different hobbies, work and family events.

It's good to be connected.

@ChampagneNightmares actually laughed at that first sentence hahaha x

I do have a ‘girl gang’ so to speak: 3 girls from my school days (1 I lived with) + 2 girls who also lived in the same flats. But we all grew up around here.

In our 20s we were in each other’s pockets, but now in our mid 30s people have moved further afield and have partners and/or children.

We usually meet up altogether once a month and meet individually in between. Other people have dipped in and out over the years, but as we get older we are definitely dwindling in numbers.

I don’t anticipate us all being as close in another 10 years. We will still see each other, but perhaps a few times a year. I’m hoping at that point I will have made some local mum friends to fill the gap.

Although I’m lucky, because I have a lot of cousins locally who form my ‘family girl gang’.

It’s definitely hard though, particularly because I’m a SAHM, so I have a lot of potential socialising time which can be quite lonely when everyone else is at work.

I agree I have friends from different stages, work friends, mum's friends and acquaintances, my close close friends, netball friends so people for different parts of my life. Just not one central core who all know each other - not sure I'd like that either I don't do politics or bitching, don't spend time with people I dont particularly click with and also can't be arsed with constantly messaging and keeping up with things!! This man change when I'm not working and parenting though. One of my friends has a lovely saying 'a friend for a reason, a friend for a season or a friend for a lifetime'

I'm in the edge of one and to be honest, I've lost my best mate to it.

They know every single thing about each other's lives, have strong opinions in anything they do and let them be known. They holiday together, eat together, they're always in some combo, together.

I find it exhausting, expensive and overwhelming. It's not for me. I also think it can get a bit weird and nasty, but they don't seem to mind!

They seem to thrive off it.

Different strokes and all that.

Nope and don’t want one either! The only real ‘gang’ I know of are total bitches behind each others backs!

Nope, that has never happened . I had one close friend at school, and 50 years later we're still great pals. Email about once a month, see each other about once a year. I'm an introvert and I've never had a "gang" of friends.

It's a load of bollocks made up by women either to make other women feel inadequate or because they are tone deaf to other experiences.

I have a boy gang from school. We have been really close for over 30 years but only one still lives in our hometown.

I have a gang from when I lived abroad. I haven’t seen them in over 10 years but we Whatsapp on an almost daily basis.

I lived in my last town for 6 years and didn’t make a single friend. I now live in a village 20 miles from there but it’s a different county and a totally different mentality. While I don’t have any close friends that I can message every day or call upon with my woes, the people are very friendly and there are a couple I meet for coffee once in a while.

I think it's hard because soooo many fiction books are written around the concept of the 'best friend' that it can make you feel like a weirdo for not having one.

I remember my DD feeling like this around 10-11 when so many books 'for girls' are centred around this unrealistic ideal of female friendships.