Would you be offended if your Bil picked you up?

[Stressedjustthinkingaboutit]

If you were flying to visit your sister on your own with your kids to another country. Would you be offended if her other half came to pick you up at the airport and drop you at your hotel?
Reason being, it’s at night and your sister is doing bedtime with their dc, would this bother you? Or would you expect your sister to be the one to come?
They will see each other the next morning

How far's the hotel from the house? I would bring them back to the house for some food if it wasn't more than 20 minutes away.

If Bil was Ted Bundy I wouldn't be very happy about it.😱

In my family my husband would have gone. I'm one of those women who others here get annoyed with because I don't like driving, especially not at night and as a couple we'd have much preferred me to do bedtime, him the pick up.
I am clearly more easy going than some high maintenance sisters however, because it wouldn't have even popped into my head to make a thing of this.

Nowhere has it said what the sister thought/said about being picked up by bil

No, it would be so weird to have a problem with this!

I'm a bit confused as to why people are asking if it's a reverse.

Op has posed a question from a fairly neutral position.

I'd be happy to get a lift but maybe wonder why BIL can't do bedtime (unless it's a younger child who is BF)

I wouldn't be "offended" BUT I would feel "some kind of way" as Americans put it. And it wouldn't be a nice feeling either.

@Tyiue What way would you feel?

Again, it depends on the family. We’re the type of people that pile into a relative’s minibus and go to the airport en masse to welcome overseas visitors the moment they step off the plan. Then we stay up all night eating and chatting (holidays allowing).

Maybe being met at the airport is OP’s sister’s love language.

As I said, OP shouldn’t be made to feel bad for not wanting to go, but I can see why the sister may have been disappointed.

Why, Is he a sex offender or something?

OP - you have not included in any of your responses any info on the distance your sister will have travelled and how long since you last saw each other

I do think the above is relevant as like most people I would not be offended in the slightest if I'd just come off a short haul flight and saw my sister less that a year ago but the chance of her being a bit put out is likely to increase the further she has travelled and the longer it has been seen you met up with her

Why do you keep on posting these updates no one needs, just ask her if she's offended

@CheeseSandwichRiskAssessment What? I‘m replying to people

@UltramarineViolet Sorry, so short haul flight-2 hrs, last saw each other 1.5 years ago

Yeah totally fine unless there’s some backstory and they’re sworn enemies or something

If I hadn't seen my sister for 1.5 years I would expect her to pick me up from the airport and her dh to put the kids to bed.

Is the BiL better able to help with the luggage 😉
I really wouldn’t care, I’d just be glad to be picked up.

So are you the sister who is putting the kids to bed? And your DP is going to pick your sister up? Or is it the other way around? It might be helpful to clarify stuff in the OP rather than these short unhelpful updates about who is going to bed when. Has your sister said it’s a problem or something?

If my sister was travelling to see me and I hadn't seen her for 1.5 years I would be the one picking her up. I wouldn't be sending my dh. He is capable of putting his children to bed.
Sorry, wanted to cover both sides 😁

I always hire my own car or make my own arrangements for transport.

What's the story?

I’m the sister putting Dc to bed, my sister hasn’t complained as I haven’t decided to do this yet, I just wanted to see if it would bother/upset others?
Reasons are:

1.My parents will only just have arrived and I would have done their airport run the day before

2.I would have been food shopping with them that day, cooking, entertaining etc

3.Dc is adhd and will be overexcited with everyone visiting, I’m much better to calm them and get them to sleep, but it will take a while

4.Not a massive fan of driving in the dark and admittedly I will be tired collecting again, dropping at airport then back home quite late, ready to be up to drive to hotel to meet them in the morning with everyone

Am I a bad person? Would you be disappointed as the other sister?

Dh has always done night pick ups from the airport before for parents and sister when parents come separately or sister comes with them

I'm assuming you're the sister at home with the kids.

No way would I be offended, in fact have been the travelling sister in this exact scenario and was very grateful to get the lift. I find it weird for anyone to react like that.

However I'm not your sister and she clearly is offended so if I was you I wouldn't make matters worse by building a case on how she's unreasonable. Try instead to see where she's coming from. Does she always make the effort? Is she feeling left out?