To think it's childish when grown women ask other women what they're wearing somewhere?

[pregahes]

Especially when it's days in advance it just seems...trivial.

AIBU to find it annoying?

If I had £1 for every online shopping screenshot I've sent to my best friend saying "what about this?" I could afford to shop at Dior.

I'm 60.

YABU 🙂

Sometimes you don't know the vibe of the place you're going and you don't want to be over/underdressed. A good friend of mine has asked me what I plan to wear a few times recently. Until the last six months she has been stuck at home with toddlers for years and years (seven years). Her measure of what people wear to evening events is a bit out of touch, which she realises. She's dropped heels and nice tops with skinnies as they're making her feel dated. She just wants to feel current and comfortable, and attractive. Seems reasonable given the years-long drudgery of kids.

I kind of know what you mean, as I don't tend to consult with my pals about outfits. I enjoy dressing up and don't tend to check with others to see if I'll fit in.

BUT I think for big events, it's part of the built up and anticipation of going to the do. Kind of like a conversation starter to discuss how much everyone is looking forward to it and to show it's being treated as a big deal. Which is rather lovely, really.

It's not something I'd think of asking as I don't care what other people are wearing but I accept that other people do.

I don’t bother asking because I just wear what I want and can dress appropriately for an occasion, but I don’t mind when people ask me! I just answer them 😂
I’m neither an exceedingly dressy person nor do I go out looking like a scruff, I veer on the casual end of the spectrum most of the time, even when going to a wedding I will wear a dress and heels but I don’t do matching bag etc and I don’t wear jewellery or accessories. I do look tidy!

When I was a child I never asked anyone what clothes they were wearing to an event. Never.

Now I am an adult I do.

Yabu - get over yourself

Doesn’t really explain the childish comment though. My children don’t converse about what clothes they are/will be wearing.

It’s an odd thing to be annoyed about, save your annoyance for bigger fish!

But I want to know what the vibe is - dressy, non dressy etc.

YNBU. Unless it was some kind of very unusual occasion l agree it's something people can generally work out for themselves.

Also when people ask me I generally don't know, unless it was a big occasion like a wedding or something.

Yes i agree, its the sort of thing teenage girls do! I couldn't care less what someone else has decided to wear.

OP, you're giving Adrian Mole vibe. Chastising his mum for being trivial thus distracting him from his efforts of being a full time intellectual.

Why? I’ve only ever done this when I am unsure of the dress code. Why isn’t that ok?

Wow you must be a ball of fun!

YABU

I like gauging the casual / dressy vibe. It also once saved my friends & I going out dressed practically identically in black trousers suits 😂

You’re right of course OP, and so much better than the rest of us 🙄🙄🙄

I have lived in several countries and Britain was the only one where I ever saw women consult one another about what they were going to wear. Wear what you like!

Just because you think it only happens in Britain, why does that make it a bad thing?
Incidentally, I have also lived in several countries and can think of at least 2 others where someone has asked what I’m wearing to an event.

It's usually smart casual.

YABU, my friends and I always do this. We love a chat about outfits, it's also a good way to make sure everyone is on the same wavelength (e.g. We're not going to turn up with one person in cargos and trainers while the rest of us are in dresses and heels).
I know some friends use it to try to elevate the style of people that underdress for occasions too, a polite way of suggesting they need to dress up a bit more.

It isn't something I'd ask as I have no interest in clothes or fashion but I suppose for lots of women into fashion and dressing up its part of the fun or they want to make sure they aren't wearing the same thing or whatever. I don't think its childish, we all have our areas of interest and things that make us happy even if others find them trivial.

DH and I always ask each other what we're wearing whenever we go out! Sometimes we'll go casual and sometimes we'll go dressed up - we don't want to out looking mismatched 😳

Absolutely love chatting shit about what we’re wearing! My friends are such fabulous dressers though.

I sort of agree..

If the girls and I are going somewhere new or where we don’t go very often, I think it makes sense to ask what each other’s wearing, so no one is over / under dressed.

However, when going to the same cocktail bar in town that we go to once a month, so we know the vibe / style etc then I don’t think there’s any need to text asking what everyone is wearing then- I have a friend who usually does ask and I always reply saying I don’t know, because genuinely I decide about an hour before we go out, when I’m getting dressed.

Well aren’t you just too cool for school. I enjoy thinking about what I’m going to wear for different occasions, I find it interesting, so I also enjoy discussing it with friends who share that interest and enjoyment. It’s called conversation.