To make a complaint against cashier at supermarket?

[Tess1011]

I have an invisible disability (neurological) and I was made to feel really small and stupid during our shop visit today. I have only recently began joining my husband and children on the weekly shop again run to rebuild my confidence after an operation.

The cashier was scanning very quickly and the shopping was piling up before my husband was able to get to it. I was keeping an eye on our son (who has special needs and is prone to running off)

She remarked to me, in a way I can only describe as sarcastically, that I should help him.

Following this, because we were paying for the shopping in two parts (because I was using a healthy start card for my fruit and vegetables) she then commented to me again that I should have just used that card in the first part of the shop. That part of the shopping totalled £68, it wouldn't have worked because there was only £17 on the healthy start card IE enough for the fruit and veg only.

I felt put on the spot and under pressure as I stood there trying to work out if I had made a mistake. Other people in the queue were looking at me and I was embarrassed.

My processing isn't very quick and I can only do things the way that I know them. It took my husband explaining to me after we left the shop that she was wrong and the way I did it was fine as it would have been declined if I had done as she said I should

I'm generally a very laid back person and this is the first time I've ever felt the need to make a complaint like this but I left the shop feeling humiliated, judged and very small.

Were you in Lidl/Aldi? If so, then you are expected to get packed up ASAP. It's part of what keeps the prices lower. So if you complain, the manager will genuinely just roll his/her eyes.

https://www.healthystart.nhs.uk/what-youll-get-and-how-to-shop/#:~:text=You%20need%20to%20activate%20your,PIN%20on%20the%20next%20transaction.

the cashier was correct - you don't need to separate the shopping into 2 lots - that is just wasting time. It sounds like there was a queue at the tills, your DH couldn't put the shopping in the trolley quick enough, you were to all intents and purposes doing nothing to help and because the cashier made a comment about maybe helping him, you've taken umbrige.
You have a hidden disability, so might the cashier!

Remarks and comments ?

Was she actually rude or were you anxious and looking for offence and judgment which maybe wasn't even there?

Don't be so ridiculous. I don't want any money from them, I just want to be able to checkout without multiple unsolicited comments.

Is that unreasonable? Why?

She didn’t make multiple unsolicited comments. She advised you to help pack the shopping and explained that you didn’t have to pay in two separate transactions.

She made one helpful comment about the HS voucher, and one comment about you not helping with the packing. The first was definitely useful and correct. The second isn't crime of the year, she's human too.

What unsolicited comments?

Suggesting you help your DH and offering you advice on how to do things in the future? She's just doing her job.

*Don't be so ridiculous. I don't want any money from them, I just want to be able to checkout without multiple unsolicited comments.

Is that unreasonable? Why?*

Because that's not the sort of society we live in. We live in a country where you are allowed to talk.

It sounds like a horrible experience OP but I don't think getting the cashier in trouble is the solution. It doesn't sound like she did anything really wrong other than be a bit insensitive. I would just chalk it up to experience and think about strategies to deal with similar situations in the future so you feel prepared.

She wasn't suggesting your £68 shopping could be paid for with £17 healthy start card, she's telling you the £17 would come off qualifying items. Agree with pp you seem to just want her admonished because you feel she upset you.

Er no she wasn't, she was definitely being rude. Were you there to hear how she spoke to me or are you just changing the narrative so I sound bad?

Of course she didn't. Total over reaction.

In an ideal world cashiers would have lots of time to scan items and the training/ability to figure out whether someone has an invisible disability or not. Chances are though, they're likely trained to get on with the job and everyone through the tills as quickly as possible.

If you struggle with processing, perhaps go through the self scanners where you can take your time or shop during one of the hours which are designed for people who are neurodiverse. Alternatively you could wear a sunflower lanyard which might make people more aware.

She wasn't overtly rude, probably just a bit frustrated at your speed and that things were being held up. I don't think I'd want to get someone in trouble over this. I think the jobs of retail workers are hard enough. Sorry OP!

Good God what a drama over very little. The fact you say you "don't want her sacked" well what company would sack someone for something so utterly trivial??!

Mountain out of molehill

I'm a bit confused OP - so you were just standing there, watching your children (multiple, including one special needs). But not actually holding their hands?
Why did you look like you were not doing anything?

*Don't be so ridiculous. I don't want any money from them, I just want to be able to checkout without multiple unsolicited comments.

Is that unreasonable? Why?*

Gosh.

Off with her head.

How come you were so discombobulated in the shop but now you are full or rage?

You are not coming across as someone who can't fight their own battles.

If that's the case, she should be more mindful how she talks to others then.

No it was tesco, although I think they must be following suit with the quick scanning as she was scanning through our shopping before the precious customer had even removed all of her shopping.

No she wasn't? Its a card now not vouchers so can't be used in that way.

She was rude. I know when somebody is being rude to me, it's all in the delivery.

You are determined to play the victim in this scenario. Just move on.

No, I'm giving my opinion, just like everyone else on here.

This is a discussion forum, not a dictatorship where everyone has to agree with you.

None of these are a cashiers business the op was looking after her child trying to cope with her disability and keep herself together. She doesn't have to help pack and she can make 2 transactions if she wants to.

WOW!