Did anything good happen to you in your forties?

[Sashamalia]

To anyone over 40, I am not calling you old.

I just turned 40. And i feel sad.

I've bought into the marketing that women are over the hill at 40, and basically nothing good happens to us after that age.

I need to snap myself out of it

Life got easier as DC needed less full on care and became more self sufficient. Family life was very enjoyable.
Meanwhile my career really took off.
As a bonus DH and I were earning well and had money for great family holidays.

So far (now late 40s)...

Positives:

successfully supported DC through nursery and primary school;

became single/a single parent;

trained and am working successfully in a completely new profession;

started writing a novel;

met a DP and got engaged;

made some great new friendships;

feel more content and comfortable in myself...

getting hrt...

Negatives:

worries about ageing parents;

worries about ageing and health;

grey hair (dyeing is a hassle) and plump;

needing hrt.

Got a degree, had a child, moved to a nicer area, made new friends.

On the downside, lost a parent, an aunt and an uncle. Didn't find a suitable job on the back of the degree.

It balances out. I don't feel hard done by or dissatisfied.

I went on a festival cruise alone, made new friends from all over the world who I go to gigs and festivals with still, lots of fun times with friends and family, new house, new job, promotions and have doubled my salary, enjoyed my ds growing from an 8 year old to a 13 year old who is a delight to spend time with. A few more years to go but so far totally recommend the 40s

What marketing ?

Loads of fab things happened to me in my 40s.
Even more so in my 50s.
I generally would say that life gets better with each passing decade (I presume I might change my mind if my health suffers in my 80s).

I married my DH at 43. I fostered our foster child at 45.

Hmm, 40s has been v challenging so far but 30s was harder (DH cancer diagnosis and death). I’m only half way through my 40s, and I’m still generally hopeful and definitely achieving things.

What do people mean "what marketing".

Every media there is: films , TV, adverts, magazines

Promotes young women as the ideal woman

Hollywood actresses talk a lot about being shunned by the industry once they are over 40

Half way through my forties and loads of good things have happened

Returned to workplace and have progressed in my new job
Have more income
My kids are getting older and independent so I have more time for myself
I have an appreciation for my health & body that just wasnt there when I was younger
Can spot a fake person a mile away and have zero tolerance for them
Im a lot more confident in myself and my own skin.

I love my forties so far!

I landed in my best job. Pay was crap but the work was easy and I had the best manager of my life - still in contact nearly twenty years later.

Now if only I can repeat that pattern!

I'm trying to embody this myself! Turned 40 in 2022 and honestly I had a bit of a crisis. I felt - and still do - feel old.

Those of you being snarky about the 'marketing' comment - cop the fuck on, stop being disingenuous. We all know that pop culture (and incel men) points at women over 30 let alone 40 as over the hill, especially if we have th audacity to be single, or overweight, or not stunningly beautiful. Just Google for any article from an actress asked to play the mother of a man only ten years her junior, for example.

Anyway, some good things - we bought a new house, I got a new job, we're going on a fantastic holiday soon and generally life is good.

The best thing about being in your forties is that you start to worry less about what you're "told" (especially by men!) I cared a lot less about what other people thought of me.

My kids were at junior school, so a great stage, I was able to work a few more hours a week, I felt a lot more confident in myself, personally and professionally and went for promotion. Financially I started to be in a better place (in credit 😂). I ran a marathon, I was probably the fittest I have ever been.

My relationship has got better the longer we've been together, we got married just before I turned forty and it brought a new dimension to things.

I think it's a great age to be! It was the decade I came into myself!

Got married, had a baby, moved into our forever home.

Finally found stability and my happily ever after

My 40s were phenomenal. I achieved so much career-wise, started earning more money, had some joyous times with my DC, paid the mortgage off, and stopped giving a shit about what other people thought of me.
I did a masters and a PhD and now working in my absolute dream role just in time to turn 50.
I've never felt better

I moved to the USA, got a green card, moved into professionally supervising others, studied "abroad" and have a job I enjoy.
I am more confident in my own skills and abilities.

It's not perfect, I've struggled for the first time ever with weight, hormones aren't great for my skin and my body doesn't bounce back like it used to. But I've done a lot of living.

Good for you @CutthroatDruTheViolent embody away!

I spent a good chunk of my year last year learning a very obscure language from a lovely native speaker. When we got to ages, I said, in the language, "I am 21" and laughed. She looked confused and said, "oh yes, I've heard women in the West value youth" with a little sigh. In her culture older women rule the roost, and wisdom and knowledge are more important.

Men might fetishise youth but they don't respect it.

I raised DC who were born in my very late thirties and early forties. I got a book published too... but mainly raised DC and that was good. Worthwhile. Moved to a lovely house as well.

I'm 44. In my 40s I've had my 3rd child, started my second business and made my first million. Going well so far.

I think you need to stop thinking about what others think about, or want from you, and make the choices you want. Your 40s generally give you that power and freedom. That’s why so many posters speak about new careers, fresh starts and feeling less constrained by the demands of children. For me it was a huge decade of change and opportunity. By the end of my forties I was in a different world, literally. Moved countries, got a different career, boosted my earnings, learned loads. All with my husband and kids, and they also had a huge transformation which has benefited the rest of their lives too.
Anything can happen! Look forward, not backwards.

Bought my first home at 40
Had my 3rd, amazing funny, loving and crazy child at 42
Became financially comfortable for the first time in my life at 46
Became confident in myself, my overweight body in my mid 40s
Finally cut off my toxic narc mother and have become happy confronting my demons for the first time in my life I know I’m worth something and although I may be physically fat I feel so light emotionally and mentally.
Stoped caring what others think of me in my 40s which has made me so happy.

I still have just under 2 years left of my 40s and I plan on enjoying them and I don’t want to wish time away but roll on my 50s!

Decided it was time to mix things up career wise - having been in the trenches of small child rearing in my 30s. Took on a volunteer role in a new challenging area; then pivoted to working there; then applied for a new job in tech: currently on my third promotion, after 3 years in role.
Alongside that, watching my kids grown into capable, funny young people and really become themselves.
Rediscovered my own interests and hobbies (more so as I head into my 50s)

don’t believe the hype, OP!

Met and married my DH, which was the start of 20-plus years of fun and happiness so far. In 50s I got a new job, did very well and loved it.

Well, I've not read a magazine in the last 30 years or so, and I don't watch adverts and am selective about what I choose to watch on TV or which films I watch.
But, as other posters have already said, the older you get, the less you care about 'what other people think' and the more you do what is right for you. So that, in itself is something that is good about your 40s, or 50s, or 60s.

I wasn't a Hollywood Actress in my 20s, so that doesn't affect me particularly.

I was promoted in my 40s and then I moved into a much better job, which I have really enjoyed.

Life got easier as the dc got older and could be left without an adult for initially short and then increasingly longer periods of time. Plus they can do so much more for themselves - baths, showers, hair washing, homework, strapping themselves into the car, going swimming, getting their breakfast, and oh so much more.

Had a baby, graduated with degree number 2, got married. Made some new good friends.

Started doing some voluntary work I'm passionate about. Realised I don't care what 99.9 percent of the population think. Started running again. Lots of good holidays doing things I want to do rather than just pleasing others. Learnt to knit and to speak my Grandfather's mother tongue.

Considering retraining in an entirely different field.

My 40s seem fine so far.

The forties are brilliant