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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for your most minor, irrational ick?

415 replies

trekking1 · 28/03/2024 22:39

The thing that men do that is completely normal to most people, but gives you the ick?

Mine is men wearing long socks with shorts. I'm sorry I just can't

OP posts:
PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:13

VictoriaEra · 29/03/2024 13:10

Yes! Me too. Even guitars in their houses!

I’m the opposite, if a man can play guitar well, he instantly increases in attractiveness to me. 🤣

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:16

Mintleafcocktail · 29/03/2024 13:05

That's all well and good but saying things like "posh voices" or "sloping shoulders " or "hairy backs" - none of these features can be changed and it's derogatory towards men because you are placing a judgment on someone's worthiness by the physical attributes

What a load of pompous bollocks. I said I did not like the word "poorly" which is neither a masculine or feminine trait, it can be used by either gender. Neither is it a physical feature that a person cannot change, it is merely a word that I personally find "ick" and you told me I needed "therapy". Telling women they are "crazy" and need therapy just because they hold a different view point to you on something so entirely insignificant is misogynistic AF.

It's also worth noting that these "what about poor menz and equality" posters are on a site predominantly for women policing our language, rather than one of the millions of other sites where men are massively derogatory towards women trying to police them.

Almost like they aren't fussed about equality at all really.

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:20

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:16

It's also worth noting that these "what about poor menz and equality" posters are on a site predominantly for women policing our language, rather than one of the millions of other sites where men are massively derogatory towards women trying to police them.

Almost like they aren't fussed about equality at all really.

👏 👏 👏

Blackcats7 · 29/03/2024 13:23

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 12:12

Women who don’t like cats
Women who only like butch looking dogs
Women who use their car as a toy instead of just transport
Women who walk around with no shirt on when not on the beach

Still not bashing of one sex, as opposed to 'ick'?

As I am not a lesbian I interpret the “ick” as something small which stops me fancying men.
If I was attracted to women I am sure I would have things to say about them too.

Guardian800 · 29/03/2024 13:24

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:02

The old 'offended' line - I am NOT offended, merely pointing out that criticising a man's behaviour or appearance, just because you don't like it and not because there is anything fundamentally 'wrong' with it, is essentially bashing. Crack on if it makes you feel better but don't pretend there wouldn't be outrage if there were a similar post written about women by men.

Exactly spot on 👍👍

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:30

Blackcats7 · 29/03/2024 13:23

As I am not a lesbian I interpret the “ick” as something small which stops me fancying men.
If I was attracted to women I am sure I would have things to say about them too.

Oh, I am sure you would, yes. 😫

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:33

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:16

It's also worth noting that these "what about poor menz and equality" posters are on a site predominantly for women policing our language, rather than one of the millions of other sites where men are massively derogatory towards women trying to police them.

Almost like they aren't fussed about equality at all really.

Most laughable response yet, and that's saying something.

OriginalUsername2 · 29/03/2024 13:33

BronwenTheBrave · 29/03/2024 13:03

Yes, what a bastard, so many red flags there. A lucky escape. Phew!

That’s why it’s irrational!!

MrsBosomworth · 29/03/2024 13:34

Guardian800 · 29/03/2024 12:27

Or maybe you should try and refrain from being sexist ? Maybe try that first ?

Now don't be silly! Some of the women on MN are amongst the most sexist individuals I've ever come across. They just can't resist a bit of men-bashing.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:35

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:11

Yes, really.

There’s no reason to be offended that not everyone will find you attractive and may find certain things about you unattractive.

Are you so vain that you think you appeal to everyone?

You seem to have (wrongly) assumed people are offended, when really they are pointing out how sexist the whole thread has become.
So no, not 'really'.

OriginalUsername2 · 29/03/2024 13:36

irrational
/ɪˈraʃən(ə)l/

adjective

  1. 1.
  2. not logical or reasonable.
  3. "irrational feelings of hostility"

@BronwenTheBrave

BobbyBiscuits · 29/03/2024 13:37

@Sandytoesandcrabs lol. Nope.
I remember another time I got scolded by the mum when I had a can of coke...'those are bfs little brothers special drinks!'
I never got fed in that house. Think the mum was trying to tell me something? Haha.

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:40

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:33

Most laughable response yet, and that's saying something.

Maybe you should re-read some of yours. They have given me a chuckle anyway.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:42

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:40

Maybe you should re-read some of yours. They have given me a chuckle anyway.

'Glad' to hear you find sexism amusing.
As stated, several times, men writing a similar thread about women would be chastised (and rightly so).

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:43

MrsBosomworth · 29/03/2024 13:34

Now don't be silly! Some of the women on MN are amongst the most sexist individuals I've ever come across. They just can't resist a bit of men-bashing.

This is correct, and whenever you point out how reversing the situation would be seen they somehow decide we are 'offended' - nope, just pointing out the hypocrisy really.

Guardian800 · 29/03/2024 13:44

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:20

👏 👏 👏

Well my response to that is simply - you either accept the principles of equality between men and women. If you simply don't want to acknowledge blatant sexist remarks, then that is your prerogative. However don't start complaining about men being sexist towards women.

Mazuslongtoenail · 29/03/2024 13:45

Men drinking from the those water bottles that have an inbuilt straw instead of tipping them up like a sports cap. I could never sleep with a man again after seeing that.

EatCrow · 29/03/2024 13:46

Solonelyifeelsolonely · 29/03/2024 09:17

It reminds me of the Barbie film where all the women are having the guitar tediously played at them by various men 🤣

I haven’t seen that film and don’t think I’ll bother now! I still feel embarrassed that I agreed to that but glad to know I wouldn’t now.

InTheShallowTheShalalalalalalalow · 29/03/2024 13:51

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 29/03/2024 13:42

'Glad' to hear you find sexism amusing.
As stated, several times, men writing a similar thread about women would be chastised (and rightly so).

Men write much, much worse stuff about women all the time.

Why aren't you on one of those sites telling them off?

Let's not pretend that a thread about minor icks is anywhere near the level of vitriol that women get online, or irl.

You keep on fighting for those poor, hard done by men though. Don't let the actual issue of real sexism stand in your way. This thread about icks is definitely the problem.

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:52

Women who don’t like cats
Women who only like butch looking dogs
Women who use their car as a toy instead of just transport
Women who walk around with no shirt on when not on the beach

Still not bashing of one sex, as opposed to 'ick'?

Nope, still not bashing. If they’re your icks, they’re your icks. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Just asked my partner what his icks are for women are and he said

big hoop earrings
cool wife types
being very muscular
short hair
lip filler
vocal fry
being interested in football only for the world cup
gossiping about friends
being scared you break a nail/nail varnish

Still not bashing.🤷🏻‍♀️

Cherrysoup · 29/03/2024 13:53

genericbrunette · 29/03/2024 08:40

People who hold their knife and fork in the wrong hands

It should be fork in left, knife in right.

But what if you’re left handed? I eat ‘cack handed’ according to my DH, but it’s because I broke my arm as a child and got into the habit of holding my cutlery in the opposite hands. I also wear my watch on the ‘wrong’ wrist ie the right because of this.

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 13:56

Guardian800 · 29/03/2024 13:44

Well my response to that is simply - you either accept the principles of equality between men and women. If you simply don't want to acknowledge blatant sexist remarks, then that is your prerogative. However don't start complaining about men being sexist towards women.

Your chatting shit. Having icks isn’t sexist. I’ve just listed my male partners icks about women.

I have an issue with actual sexism.

Why don’t you go back to justifying men going to Thailand to find a bride? Interesting responses from you on that thread.

We see you.

PlayOurSong · 29/03/2024 14:01

*You’re

Swashbuckled · 29/03/2024 14:01

takealettermsjones · 29/03/2024 11:06

Haven't RTFT but my ick is when men greet each other in that over the top way - "here he is, the man the myth the legend, Mr Bridger! How are you doing sir? Top man" etc etc

God, yes!
Why do they do this?
Mental.

KreedKafer · 29/03/2024 14:03

totallylost1 · 29/03/2024 02:42

I have a whole long arse list.

Crocs or even worse, crocs with socks.

Shirts on men when they leave them unbuttoned or wearing clothes 3 sizes too small.

Dirty fingernails.

Grown ups using text talk. I mean, are you that lazy you can't put in the extra 2 letters that's usually needed to formulate an actual English word?

Loud chewing/swallowing. Nose picking. Fingernail biting.

People who don't want their hands after using the toilet. That literally makes me want to puke.

Liars!

Bad fucking hygiene! (Pull the foreskin back.. it stinks!)

Middle aged gamers.

People who can't ever apologise or believe that they could be wrong.

Ignorance and arrogance.

Untidiness.

Anyone who says..

"My kids are my world" - well duh! Surely that's the most obvious thing in the world, doesn't need to be said.

"Work hard, play harder" 🤮

Men on dating apps who do the whole, holding the fish pic, standing next to their Audi TT like it's their firstborn, sweaty gym pics where they're flexing (who is genuinely impressed by that?) or when every picture they're holding an alcoholic beverage and a ciggie..... just no and finally when they think 2 messages is enough to want to meet for sex! Does that ever work!????

Know-it-alls annoy me!

People who look down on others for whatever reason and they think they're better. No one is better than anyone!

Cheaters!

Racists.

Misogynists.

Flatearthers and conspiracists.

People who mistreat their animals, that gives me more than the 'ick' that's giving - I want you to go to jail!

Cars that are filthy inside!

People who piss on the toilet and don't wipe it.

Abusive people to their partners, gaslighters, narcissists....

People who don't like music - like WTF!?

Uncultured individuals.

Men who are dripping in jewellery who like to point out the brand of watch.... not interested! I wear a Casio that cost £9.99 - see me flexing my retro wrist wear!?

Those who incapable of compromising.

I think that's it.... for now!

The OP asked for ‘minor, irrational’ icks. I don’t think ‘animal cruelty’ and ‘domestic abuse’ really come under that umbrella, do they? You might as well say “Call me picky, and I know I’m being unfair, but I just get really irritated by paedophiles.”