To say I'm dreading Easter Bank Holidays ?

[Pappadontpreach80]

DH & 2 mid teen DC at home. They will game, maybe see mates etc. They are too young to be left at home all day alone. Me and DH are always around, even if we're in & out the house doing errands etc.

There is nothing going on this bank holiday. Its due to rain the whole time. DC refuse to go away (uk). They might come out for a day. I do not want to be stuck at home doing jobs the whole time. Which is what I do most weekends.

I'll go for a run, see local family etc but apart from that it's going to be be bloody boring. I could go out with friends but I would feel bad leaving DH at home, alone, bored on a bank hol weekend. I don't even know if my friends are around tbh.

What on earth am I going to do ?

Tbh, Friday night I just wanna piss off to the pub with DH. But a bit meh just the two of us. DC like us to be at home, even if they are gaming in their rooms. They like to know we are there. Boring.

Saturday we will go out with DC in the eve for food.

To add, DC don't do walks/ national trust/biking etc so anything like that is out of the question. We don't do the theatre. There's nothing on at the cinema.

Please can someone give me some inspiration. I can't face 4 days in the house/ doing jobs.

How old are they? If they’re mid teens then they’re old enough to be left alone for the day (unless there are extenuating circumstances you’ve not mentioned) so if you’re choosing not to then that’s on you really… in the nicest way possible! I understand that you’d like to all go out together, but it’s hard if you don’t have shared interests. There must also be places you could go to for the ‘day’ that wouldn’t involve being gone for 10 hours?!

Christ OP that's dreary, can you really not think of anything. We've teens, we're going to the cinema to see the Ghostbusters film, Godzilla is out too. We'll get a takeaway, play some board games/VR, there's a new mini golf place we want to try on the Monday. And they'll hibernate gaming for the rest. DH and I could go to the local pub for a couple hours if we fancied it.

Funny how pizza is always mentioned too.

It's hideously expensive for what it is?
Why don't the teens learn to cook a roast dinner or a nice spag bol, then they can help their mum out sometimes and get a decent meal.

Being in the house all weekend ≠ doing jobs all weekend though. If my kids left me alone I would watch so much telly in bed, read, exercise, craft, go out for lunch etc, basically do whatever I want.

I left DD15 from 7-7 today whilst I went to work.

She looked after poorly dog, revised for GCSEs, emptied the dishwasher and washed and dried the dog's bed from her being poorly first thing.

Why on earth can't they be alone or 'allow' you to go out?

You sound like you don't enjoy doing anything very much OP. I'm not surprised you're bored! Are you sure you're not just a prisoner of your own mind?

I'm struggling. Six weeks ago my partner of 17 years ended our relationship. I can honestly say I never saw it coming, he was perfect for me, so loving, so kind, my soul mate. He told me he didn't love me any more and had felt like this for a year. He completely shocked me. Since the day he told me he has ignored me other than when I go to him to try and talk (we have a house together which needs to be sorted out). I feel nothing but utter grief, I hate that I have wasted so many years of my life.

This is so weird. Why can’t you leave your teens alone? My 11 year old can be trusted home alone for a short while… Why does a day trip need to last 10 hours? You could go to a local forest or on a walk. A typical day out for us like this would be: lazy morning, out at 11, couple of hours in the fresh air, pub on the way home for a quick pint, back in time for a take away or movie night. I’d be making your teens go if it were me!

Why can’t you and your husband go for a local walk and pub trip or lunch for a couple of hours?

If they're not old enough to be left all day fair enough, but are they old enough to be left for a few hours? Could you and your husband go out for lunch and a mooch round the shops? Or a nice walk? Or a coffee shop?

The two adults in the house don't have to spend the whole long weekend doing nothing, because the two teenagers in the house don't want to.

That sounds AMAZING.

4 days op:

One obligatory day out as family biking, visiting a local attraction, walking or hiking, and ending up in pub.

One day where you meet a friend for half a day and spend half the day pampering. And your dh stats at home and does chores/cooking/gardening.

One day where your dh gets to go out and meet his friends and you stay at home and catch up with chores/gardening/cooking. Maybe cook for everyone that might? And your teens invite friends over?

And one day where your dh and you sneak out for some alone time, to the cinema, or to lunch, then go for a walk and bring the teens a pizza or a takeaway back in the evening.

That covers all bases I think!

We have a young child so we are hosting friends on Friday. Couldn’t you invite friends over for a takeaway and some drinks if the pub isn’t an option

Your kids are mid teens, yet they are 'too young' to be left at home alone and can't cope when you go out?

Have they been treated like babies their whole lives? How on earth do they cope at school / sixth form? I moved out of my parents house at 16! They're plenty old enough. Stop letting them dictate your life and crack on.

You’re kind of in a prison of your own making though. They can “expect” you to be around all they like. Doesn’t mean you have to be. By mid teens I’m assuming they’re maybe 16 and 14. You used to be able to join the army at 16 so I think they’ll be ok while you go to the pub ( assuming no SEN). Just do what you want.

Turn wi-fi off. Don't understand what the problem is. Either they come out or you leave them with no WiFi. Good old board games.

Really sorry BeCoralKoala that sounds really hard 💐. I can understand why you are dreading the Bank Holiday. Maybe you will get a better response if you create a post of your own? Or find some good ideas here. I hope you are ok.

Just as an aside, you haven’t wasted the years you were with him. You had a good sustained relationship. It’s recently come to an end and you understandably feel shocked and bitter and angry atm. But those feelings will eventually change and subside and you will see that an unhappy ending doesn’t negate all the good times that you had together.

Probably so that people don't advise going to the theatre.

Hm. Sorry, deleted. Mistake. 😁

What do you like doing? Obvs we are all different but I’d lovely a lazy weekend where the kids let me ignore them :D

I’d read a book, potter in the garden, have some nice wine, do some creative writing, go for a walk!

my mum used to say ‘only boring people get bored’. Not saying you are boring, but you are in charge of how much fun you are having! Figure out what you love and do that. Some with kids, some without!

That wasnt really the point I was making

I would rather go out than eat at home, I love eating out, but not at a chain pub.

I find it quite hard when people panic about being ‘bored’ and in the same breath mention a list of privileges like having local family, eating out, cinema, etc. It seems we’ve stopped seeing any of things as privileges and are always looking for more, feeling hard done by if we don’t get it.

This! Just leave them on their own and go out with your husband.

Mid teens? You can definitely go out for 10 hours. Go out wherever you like with your husband or your friends. They do not need you to be there all the time.

I have one classed as mid teen and one almost teen. Both are perfectly capable of being home alone all day, amusing themselves and making lunch. We're working on their clearing up their own shit.

Over bank Holiday weekend, this will happen:
Gardening if it ever stops raining. Kids might help if bored enough or bribed.
Younger dc will already have made plans with friends.
We will do film nights.
We will visit family for a few hours.
We will have a day out.
Everyone will get to do something they enjoy at some point over the weekend.

I don't get this. Your teens want to be in their rooms gaming all the time but dont want you to leave the house. Sounds very entitled of them. Not sure why you are pandering to it. Why don't you use Easter as an opportunity to change the dynamics in the house. Tell them what they're doing with you as a family and then spend the rest of the time as you please. You don't have to live like this.